Crazy Talk

"I need to go some where. So, I'll drop you off at your friends house that way you won't be with our parents." I said.

Lo said "So, like a free day!"

I said "Exactly."

Lo smiled and I asked "Aren't you cold?"

Lo said "No but I see you are. Even though you ran alot."

I said "I know right. Anyways, your bodyguard will be with you just in case."

Lo nodded and they left. I said "Drive me to Suga's house please."

My bodyguard nodded and he drove me to his house.

I got off the car and knocked on the door nervously. His parents opened the door and we greeted eachother.

"Can I see Suga?" I asked as I walked in.

His father said "He's in his room. Goodluck trying to talk to him."

I said "Is there something wrong?"

His mother said "He hasn't came out of his room."

I said "Ok I will go up to his room, thank you."

I went up and knocked on his door. No one responded or opened. I continued to knock on the door.

"Who is it? Go away!" Suga said.

I rolled my eyes as he didn't even let me speak and continued to knock again.

Suga opened the door and it was so dark inside his room. I couldn't even see where I was walking. I went to his curtains as I saw a little bit of light. I opened them and turned to see Suga lay down. He put the blanket over his head and said "Close the curtains."

I said "I came to talk to you."

Suga didn't say anything.

I said "Look I been talking to Meri my therapist and me just going back to that house made me react like that. I hope you understand but I talked to her again. I'm terrified of getting married and having kids. Everything, I went through made me like this and its still not easy for me."

I sighed and said "Sometimes I feel like I'll never be able to overcome my fears and I don't want to drag you into anything. That's why I just want to let you go even though I love you so much."

Suga took off the blanket over his face and looked at me with an unreadable face.

I said "I do want to get married to you but I'm scared I'll turn into one of my parents or both of them. I know we're like Lo's parents but I just don't want to hurt you."

I looked away and said "I'm sorry I may push you away sometimes but I know how it feels to be hurt. I don't want to hurt you or anybody. I just want everyone to be happy and most importantly you."

Suga got off the bed and my heart rate started to raise quickly. He came over to me and said "You know I would never hurt you or Lo."

I looked at him and said "I know you wouldn't. You're the perfect guy and I'm not perfect."

Suga chuckled and said "We're nothing like your parents and if we ever do act like them. We'll be here for eachother and we'll get help together. Lo is happy and so are we. We have this under control."

I started to tear up and said "Please help me not change my mind again."

Suga looked at me confused and said "You wanted to marry me before?"

I looked away and said "Yes but things just kept happening and changing."

Suga said "Moni, you control your life now and I control mine. As long as you want to marry me, everything should come out fine."

I bit my lip and said "Now my parents."

Suga said "I'm sorry."

I quickly looked at him confused and asked "What?"

Suga looked away and turned around.

I widen my eyes and asked "What did you do?"

Suga said "I paid to get their citizenship."

I walked around to face him as I said "You what?!"

Suga said "I know! I'm sorry but you can't support them forever. Your giving them money and they are getting money from the business too. You can't be living your whole life a lie. You know it's illegal to hide people like them here. You could go to jail and what would happen to Lo?!"

I sat down on his bed and processed everything he was saying.

Suga said "I just wanted to prevent things from happening in the future."

I let out my breath slowly and said "I don't know if they even deserve to be here."

Suga widen his eyes and said "When did the love you had for them change?"

I said "I always have loved them but what about them? Look at me. I have mental problems because of them. I know I'm a good person but I feel like I'm not good enough at all. I feel like they never loved me and all I have for them is fake love."

Suga squated down infront of my knees and said "You have every right to not love them. I never understood why you cared and loved them so much."

I looked down at him and said "I know they have worked so hard for us but they missed the most important thing you give to children. It's love and not just for a few seconds. Your supposed to give them so much love everyday no matter what."

A tear rolled down my cheek and Suga said "I just helped them so we don't have to deal with them anymore. They can get help from the government and they won't get in trouble by the law."

I said "I know and thank you."

Suga said "If you don't want to help them that's fine."

I said "No I will still help them. They're my parents but I won't love them anymore. I don't hate them I just dislike them."

Suga chuckled and said "Hate is a strong word. I love how you used the word dislike instead of hate."

I chuckled and said "I hope they lighten up a little bit."

Suga sighed and said "You know now I'm scared."

I laughed and asked "Why?!"

Suga said "I need to ask your dad for your hand."

I felt really sick when he said that and Suga stood up quickly and said "Moni! Are you ok?!"

I blew air with my hand and said "My mother will kill me."

Suga said "If you don't want me to that's fine."

I stood up and said "No, we will do this right. I'm just terrified."

Suga said "We're protected. They won't be able to do anything."

I said "I know but she can still kill me in front of her."

Suga said "We'll have a doctor in the car if we need one."

I laughed and said "Your so funny."

Suga said "I'm serious. You never know what could happen."

I held Suga's hands and said "Don't let me down, please."

Suga kissed my forehead and said "Don't worry. I'll never let you fly away. Your mine forever."

I said "Once, we marry there's no going back."

Suga said "Ever since we met I knew I couldn't go back."

I laughed and said "I forgot to tell you. I went out for a run and I'm all stinky."

Suga said "I don't care. So, let's go tell my parents."

I said "No, please."

Suga looked at me and asked "Why? What's wrong?"

I said "Let's tell mine first. Just in case I die or you. It won't hurt them as much."

Suga asked "If your parents disagree, will you leave me?"

I quickly said "No, I'm not going back anymore. I will not hurt you again. I feel like I have hurt you my whole life and it's time to show you love for the rest of my life."

Suga smiled and said "You sound so different right now."

I said "I always hid this side of me because of my mother."

Suga kissed me and smiled. "I know." He said.

"I don't want to go..." I said really scared.

Suga laughed and asked "You were so confident a few seconds ago and now you want to hide?"

I laughed and said "Good thing your by my side so I won't chicken out. Anyways, let's go pick up Lo and tell her the news first."

Suga chuckled and said "Let me shower and change first."

I said "Hurry because I been gone for awhile already"

Suga said "Ok."

*20 Minutes Later*

Suga came out changed and we headed out to pick up Lo. We went in the car that had my bodyguard.

Lo said "I don't think Suga can go home with us."

I said "Lo, we need to tell you something."

Lo asked kind of scared "What?"

Suga looked down at Lo next to him and said "Me and Moni are getting married."

Lo gasped and said "What?! This is amazing! I can't wait! When?"

Suga said "First, we're going to tell your parents and then we'll see what happens."

I said "Wait! Stop the car."

Suga asked "What's wrong?!

I said "We can't tell them."

Suga asked "Why?"

I said "If they don't agree they'll kick me out the house and Lo will be alone with them."

Suga looked out the window and Lo said "Your right! I can't stay with them alone. Maybe they will kidnap me or do something."

I looked ahead and thought of a new plan.

I sighed and Suga looked at me and asked "What?"

I said "Before, I tell you, I need you to know that I'm not using you and this wasn't planned."

Lo looked at me confused and then looked at Suga.

Suga said "I believe you."

I said "We would have to get married now."

Suga asked "What?"

I said "Remember you said that the guardianship process would fasten up if we got married?"

Suga gasped and said "Of course! I forgot but are you serious?"

I said "We can wait until the four months and do it all right or just get married now."

Suga said "I have never heard you speak so crazy in my life but I love it."

Lo said "I feel like this is my fault."

I said "No! I love Suga and we already talked about this."

Lo said "I don't think our parents want you to marry, Suga."

I said "I'm positive they don't but I do want to marry him."

Suga said "Let's get married then."