Chapter 16

Weekday evenings were generally quiet in the town of Lamar. Cordia usually spent the time after supper reading in her room or playing the piano for her father in the den. Occasionally, a few of the elder men in town would meet with her father in the parlor, the door closed, voices low and secretive, and the only indication of what was going on in there was the continual smell of pipe smoke that seeped out from around the door. Of course, Cordia knew they were discussing the imminent war and the defense of the town, which was a welcome idea, at last. By late April, there seemed no way around it. There was a fight coming, and they could no longer pretend it away. Several men were leaving the county every day to meet up with regiments from one side or the other.

The State Guard continued to drill on the square, and sometimes, when she was bringing lunch to her daddy, Cordia would see Jaris drilling right along with them. He was very good, too, she had noticed, never seemed to miss a beat. Most of the time he was too consumed by what he was doing to realize she was there, but from time to time, she'd see him catch her out of the corner of his eye and a crooked grin would pull at the corners of his mouth. Eventually, the men were drilling every day and Cordia knew it was just a matter of time before Jaris left, went off with his unit to join up with Claiborne Jackson's men.

It had been several weeks since Jaris's birthday celebration, and Cordia had not seen his cousin, Will, since that day in the rain. At church, she had gotten a chance to talk with Julia, who was still very thankful for all that Cordia had done to help her regain her composure after her brother's murder. She had said only that Will was not in a religious mood these days. Then, she said that she was pretty certain that he would be joining up with Franz Sigel's Union men, who were now encamped somewhere between Lamar and Springfield. Cordia couldn't help but ask why Julia thought he wouldn't be joining the Southern cause like his cousin, but Julia explained that Will felt like it was the Confederate Army that was partially responsible for Nolan's death. Guerrillas of Southern sympathy had been terrorizing the area, and there was no doubt that the men who had shot their brother were in support of "the cause."

Though she had not seen Will for many days, her mind had wondered to him many times. She wasn't sure why. There was just something about him that made her want to stare into those infinitely deep brown eyes. At first, she had tried to put him out of her mind. She had concentrated on Jaris—even tried to make herself think of all the horrible things her poor fiancé may have to go through in battle—so as to avoid thinking about his cousin. But, eventually, she gave up trying not to think about Will. Now, it seemed almost every time someone began to talk to her, she wasn't listening. She was daydreaming about a time when there was no war, and Jaris had decided upon marrying someone else. Then, Will (who hardly knew her and surely had not thought of her at all since he saw her last) could declare his love for her and they could ride off on a white horse….

"Cordia!"

"Fiddle," she said under her breath. She had done it again. Here she was, up in her room, supposed to be reading her Bible, and instead her mind had wandered off to the point that she did not hear her mother yelling for her. She could tell by the tone of her voice that this was not the first time she had hollered up the stairs at her.

"Yes, Mother," she said running to the landing that overlooked the staircase. She could see by the expression on her mother's face that she was not amused at having to stand there and scream.

"Jaris is here! Please come down!"

And then, Cordia saw him, standing behind her mother, his hat in his hand, looking at the ground. "Strange," she thought. "Why would Jaris be here on a Thursday?" He had never shown up in the middle of the week before—ever. She began to think maybe something had happened. "I'll be right down." She ran back to her room to straighten her dress, and then bounded down the stairs. Her mother was still standing in the foyer, smiling at Jaris, who seemed to be making polite conversation. Her father and several men were in the parlor, doors shut, smoke billowing.

"Jaris," Cordia began, "what on earth are you doing here in the middle of the week?"

"Now, Cordia," her mother reprimanded. "Is that the way to greet the man you love?"

Cordia had meant no disrespect, and Jaris could see that. "That's all right," he replied. "I thought you would be surprised to see me, but I need to talk to you."

Once again, Cordia's mind was spinning with imaginative explanations for his presence. Was there a battle? Had his home been attacked? He looked too calm for that. What could it be?

"Would you mind joining me on a short stroll, Miss Cordia? If it's all right with your mother, of course?"

Cordia looked at her mother, who nodded her approval. She grabbed a hat from the hook by the door and stepped outside.

At first, Jaris took her by the arm and led her out into the moonlit sidewalk without any explanation at all. In fact, it took him several minutes before he even spoke. It was all Cordia could do to keep herself from asking questions, but she was trying to downplay her role as the curious girl who could not be patient. And Jaris was intrigued, so he kept her in suspense for as long as he could, wondering what was wrong with her that she hadn't started asking him questions.

Finally, he turned to her and asked, "Well, don't you want to know what I'm doing here?"

"Of course." Cordia blurted out, no longer able to control herself. "I was trying not to be nosey, but if you aren't going to explain yourself…."

He was laughing at her now. She expected as much. She wasn't sure why so many people found her curiosity so amusing. "Cordia, I am going to miss you something awful," he said. Her eyes opened wide with realization at what he was saying, and she could hardly believe her ears.