maybe he does miss me#8

Tyler pov

As I sit here looking out the window thinking maybe he does miss me? Maybe he accualy cares about me,but on the other hand i fucking doubt he cares about me or he would have come and told me how much he loves me. At this point i could care less, he's supposed to sign me as a singer,im just waiting for that to happen, all of these pictures on my phone they are starting to mean nothing to me, maybe he went back to my adoptive mother.. maybe he wants pussy instead..maybe everything was a lie that he told me.. I wish I never fucking kissed him or touched him or let him touch me..its so wrong to fantasies about him..im going to make it a little more clear on how fucked up my family is well. He is my biological father he made me with some unknown whore.. and my "mother" well he was forced to marry her,so that explains it a little more. And the women he got pregnate well she got him really drunk and used a date rape drug and yeah here I am.

I walk into the bathroom and grab one of my razors..I know this is not the best fucking idea but hey what can I lose,its not like he wants me anymore.. even if he did..nah what am I even saying of course he would never want me..

I push the blade into my stomach,I press down a little bit and pull it across while I watch the red substance known as blood drip out of me onto the white bathroom tiles. I keep draging it across my skin until there are about 5 cuts going across my stomach,I place the razor onto the counter and start to clean my cuts up,I use proxide and wrap them up so they can't be infected,been there done that its not fun. I clean up the floor and head towards my bed. Its almost midnight and I need sleep,I haven't been sleeping so I atleast need to try and get some rest..I climb into the hotel's king size bed and fall into a deep sleep.

Allen pov

"damn it mark the rose petals are supposed to go on the ground and the walk way!"

"How many times do I have to tell you people where things go like holy fuck are you dumb are just not listing".

"S..sorry boss my bad".

"Yeah,yeah."

If you're wondering why im so stressed well im getting Tyler's supprise ready and my im sorry supprise,its almost set up because tommrow it's the day to tell him how I feel. If he pushes me away I can't blame him for it,but if he takes me back then I have alot of making up to do,I know its going to be a slow process for him to trust me,but it will be all worth it in the end. The rose petals are down the tent is up, the candles will be put up soon enough,the pizza and wings are going to be here around 8pm tomorrow night.

He is all that I can think of,I have only gotten atleast two hours of sleep since I fucked up..that was the worst thing that I could have done in my life. He is my princess and I be his prince,but only if he allows me im not going to push anything on him,but I might change the sleeping arrangements,he would most likely sleep with me in the same bed,unless he dose not want that then,thats what we're gonna do.

I step into my black Mercedes and my driver starts to drive towards my house,the time now is just about 4:30am,i started setting up the whole idea around 6:00pm yesterday,lets just say I'm really fucking tired,but non the less it needed to be done,and I was not about to let a bunch of movers bring stuff in and set it up when im not there. I really dont trust people,you can call me crazy but im famous and so is my son so god knows what someone could do to the food or etc,and im really not in the mood to get kidnaped. 

Finally im home,i lock the door behind me and make my walk up the stairs,im so tired that I feels like ill never make it up these stairs. I finally get inside of my room,I take off my shirt and jeans,all im left in is my black boxers,I walk into my bathroom,I brush my teeth and do a face scrub. Well I guess im all done and there is nothing left to do,ill just get a shower in the morning I dont have the time or the patience to take a shower right now,I just hope he is taking take of himself...and not hurting himself,if I find out hes hurting himself so god help me,that boy will be tied up and he will give me answers.

I slip into my black velvet sheets,I stare up at the ceiling until my eyes start to get heavy and I drift of into a nice sleep.

***************************************

Snap:rainbow_pride21

Insta:rainbow_princess212

Twitter:rainbow_princess21

Tumblr: rainbowprincess21

Spotify: rainbow_princess21

Pintrest:rainbow_princess21