Chapter 39.

A few days flew by in an awkward silence, each of the three humans reacting differently to the new knowledge : the author of the booklet they studied, the one who made their survival possible, was partly responsible for their presence in this nightmare. That was a truly demoralizing thought. Nick looked extremely pissed, while Rose was obviously still wrapping her mind around it. When it came to Enora, she tried her best to stay calm and composed, considering it as unimportant for the time being as it did not change a single thing about their immediate predicament.

As the three entered yet another unexplored cave, the scenery operated an enormous change. The ground turned dark brown, into loose soil, while the walls almost disappeared behind a large forest as far as they could see. The trees were a bit weird though, with a light grey colour to its bark, and pale orange leaves. Stepping onto this new ground made even Enora lightly moan in excitement : it was tender and pleasant to tread, not too moist, not sticking to their boots. And there was no grass, only the brown dirt.

- At last, something new., mumbled Nick in a thankful tone.

The feeling was very much shared, but Enora still tried to stay cool-headed, preparing herself for the new challenges that they would probably face in the future. She vividly remembered the way they laboriously dealt with the mine battle. They risked their lives, made mistakes and almost died in there, and even though they prevailed, the tanned warrior did not feel good about it. "We had too much trouble. If the next step turns more difficult, we're screwed.", she grimly thought.

- Guys, let's take a break and talk., she said.

The others did not complain, welcoming it after the last few hours of travel.

- I don't know if you noticed, but we're beginning to show our limits., she began, serious in face and tone. Even with magic, we almost died in the mine, and I'm not optimistic in the coming fights.

- Well I don't see how to get better., objected the man to her right. I may not be a master of the different Schools of magic we know, but I do my best to improve, as does Rose I imagine.

The girl nodded a few times, adding :

- We cannot learn more about proper weapons handling either since we would need a teacher for that. What do you propose Enora ?

The tall woman took a few seconds to organise her thoughts, to find the best way to explain her idea, then she went for it in the simplest way.

- Nexus of Minds.

Silence fell on the group, as they all took in the possibility and its consequences.

- You all read it., continued Enora. It would link our minds, senses and memories together, allowing us to maximize our battle efficiency. The Weaving of Elements, as powerful as it looks, is still a theory while Body Strengthening takes time and is dangerous. I think …

- There are drawbacks though., interrupted Nick. For a start, it is permanent, and even if we accept that, we would also share our deepest secrets, which feels … uncomfortable, at best.

- True., agreed Rose. We would gain battle prowess in exchange for the most basic individual intimacy.

- Come on., frowned Enora. You read the book. It clearly says that we can all hide things with practice. It's not ideal, I know, but what are we gonna do ? Mmh ? If you two got better ideas, go ahead and tell.

The other two took a few minutes to think about it or wonder if more adequate possibilities were available to them. Enora could see the mental struggle of her companions, frowning and wrinkling their faces in the effort. Nick tried to argue a bit :

- What if nothing comes next ? What if we get out of it in like a day or two ? We would have done this whole nexus thing for nothing.

- And what if we don't ? You ready to bet your life that we'll be free before encountering greater danger than before ? I'm fucking not.

Even Rose did not rebuke at that point, simply saying :

- Well, if you think that's the way to go, then I'll follow you. Even if I don't like it …

Enora nodded with a smile while the man stood up and began pacing a bit, gnawing on his right thumbnail. He really looked annoyed and frightened at the same time, as if he was cornered, forced to choose between two equally bad options.

- Do you have something in your mind that you are afraid to share with us ?, guessed the warrior.

He stopped every movement, his back turned.

- Yes, I do., he said lightly. Of course, I do. How could I not ? My mind is a secret place where only I can access, where anything that I think is stored and never shared. And you are afraid too ! I won't believe for a second that you're not !

Rose had a scared glow in her eyes when realising how deep that choice would affect them all. Every secret, every thought, every desire, free for other people to see. That was terrifying. Enora felt the same but had an alternative.

- Let's talk about it beforehand then., she said. I mean, not everything you know, just the worst that we can think of.

A few minutes had to pass before they all came to terms with the proposal, and they sat in a circle, ready to say what they always thought they would never put into words. Enora was way too scared by what was about to happen, even more than all the times she fought against monsters out her worst nightmares. Yet, Rose was the first to go.

- I feel excited when I kill., she whispered. Physically I mean.

"What ?", reacted Enora in mind. But she did not have time to develop her surprise that the girl continued.

- Not at first. At first, I was frightened and all, but the more I did it, the more I realised how … exhilarating it was. It's … disturbing.

The blond had her face hidden in her arms, leaning on her knees, but even in that position, Enora could guess how deeply red her face must have been. That was definitely personal, intimate and sickening. "I like killing them too, I guess, but it's because every one of them dead means less chance of me following. For her it's … a game ? A filthy game.". Long moments ensued before the tall woman took her turn.

- I … In case I had to choose between leaving this place and saving you two, I don't think I'd choose the latter. There would be hesitation, a lot of it. Enough for the situation to force me into leaving, as an excuse maybe.

Nick's eyes became very cold. He never wore this kind of expression before, that of profound disappointment and disgust. But a second was enough to remind him that it was his turn to talk, and that reaction may come from the other two next. He took a look at Enora, a longer one at Rose, then breathed heavily once.

- I'm attracted to Rose., he said at a fast pace.

The shock of this statement made Rose's head rise, with wide eyes and traces of many feelings mixed inside. Enora would have tried to understand those if she was not almost in the same state, fixing her gaze on the man, himself avoiding them.

- It was the case from the first moment before I knew how old she really was., he continued. I don't think it is that surprising, every man is attracted to youthful and innocent looking women I think, right ? … Right ?

That last part was pronounced in a pleading, trembling voice, asking for understanding and maybe forgiveness while knowing very well nothing of the sort would be given. This whole event was extremely difficult for the three of them, suddenly sharing what they thought deep in their minds, the most shameful ideas hiding in there. And Enora knew, she knew why Nick shocked her the most. "Because perverted thoughts are the most intimate possible, and those that would be honest about it are rare. Because that specific perversion is disgusting, more so than I could have imagined …". The Nexus of Minds plan looked quite compromised indeed.