Rethinking my life

She's dead. I didn't want any of this to happen, but I was trapped. I was the victim! Victims, like me, have a hard time saying they are one, until they snap. I snapped, and my urges, ugh...my urges got to me. They take over, and now I'm on the floor with blood on my hands, and a dead woman's eyes staring right at me. Those brown eyes, those deep, brown, chocolate eyes are now dead to me, and I despise them. Her eyes were the warmest feeling I had ever felt. I should scoop them out with a scorching hot spoon, and the contact with her eye will steam into the atmosphere causing the air to be filled with her essence, her slain essence. I have to clean this up. There is blood on the walls, the nightstand, bed sheets, couch, and my body. Bleach, Clorox, Pine Sol, my cleaning gloves, and my superior cleaning skills, will get me through this mess.

"OH MY GOD, MY DATE!", I need to go right now!

"Julian, I need you to come see this!" says a young woman with curly black hair.

"What!"

"This book, I need to buy it now! It talks about a young girl who falls in love with an alligator. Seems pretty cool, huh!"

"Sure. If you want to marry one!"

"So funny. You should be a comedian one day, and I will be your assistant to roast on."

"It seems like my career will go really far, and successful!"

"I would think you shouldn't be commenting on my good capture of wonderful books, knowing you are the one that reads about anime girls becoming a peasant to the higher man and fall in love."

"First off everyone loves that and secondly maybe you should read those sometimes."

"I don't want to read about men being mean and hateful to a woman who is helping and how he "claims" he doesn't like he but he's just a aggressive little b-"

"Hey, hey now. I understand where you're coming from but the people love what they love. If you were a author you research what people like today. Like maybe the trends starting now and other things that catch people in the mood of reading, and you know us women we love that dominating man taking control of us and submitting to him."

"Heh. Not me missy. Only anime does that and not saying all anime does it but the majority overrules it all. I'm not the anime type, and I don't submit to a man on any circumstances."

"Ok, ok. We just see things differently and I understand."

"Mhm. I don't think you do but that's a conversation we'll finish later on."

"Yea."

"So...don't you need to be going on your date?"

"My date? What do you mean?"

"I think the submitting to a man conversation wiped your date memory away."

" Oh my god, Sicily! I need to go right now I totally forgot and your ranting got me all up in the clouds."

"Hey Julian don't switch this on me! I'm just say-"

"But, but, but, that's where I stop you. I love you girl I'll catch up with you later! Bye!"

"Bye! Don't screw this up and if you see one red flag, get the heck out of there!"

"Gotcha! hehehe"

"Vin, I thought you had a date today. You could have taken the day off." said the manager.

"Nah. I'm good. I'll call her later anyway."

I need to focus. I can call the chick later, then we'll meet up later tonight and I'll easily take her by my grasp. Easy peasy. I work at Spencers five times a week then I have the weekend off all to myself. Usually I'll swipe on tinder or maybe look at some girls on facebook and scroll through their profile and see who they're related with. Some of the girls I look at on Facebook are married! Yep, married, and sometimes I wonder why be married and always text me back when I say let's me up at my place. It's funny because women always submit to me. It's so easy to get them because my charm and aggressiveness holds onto them like a toddler not wanting to let go of his mother's leg. I know it's wrong for me to dm them, but why not? I'm looking for the right one and not to just be dating. I want a beautiful, intelligent, remarkable wife. I want to relate to her and travel the world, give a piece of my precious heart to her so she can keep it and protect until death. I think everyone wants that love, that wife. But I noticed the women that are married to men, and are replying back to a man like me, is a dirty woman. She's filthy in her disgusting attitude and vibe. Her presence is negative and deceiving. Who would want that? Not me, I want a wife who is loyal to me. I know I might fall rock hard for this woman, this future woman I call my wife. If she ever tried to pull some slick mess like that it would be completely over. Basically a done deal for the both of us.

I never had trouble getting a girl, I had trouble finding the one. I can always get a girl's number of Facebook, sometimes Insta. Just like the time at my job, Spencers. Getting a girl's number in Spencers is too easy. They are already gothic and fragile anyway, so asking them out, going on a date, and striking them in the back of their head, is not even difficult. I'm in no way at all goth, and I will never be goth, only if I have to be.

James is the manager. He is very chill, and I can tell him about my life problems, but he always suspects my problems are with girls. Yes, I do have issues with certain women, well maybe all, but I never wanted it to be this way. James knows the deal, we see them come and go all the time with their boyfriends, and let me tell you, those gothic women are insane. Like not in a mean way, but in a way where I'm a little attracted to them. I still want to be the alpha in the relationship but they are in the middle. Some can be aggressive in way you fall head over hills for them, and some have you looking twice at their beauty. James is always trying to mack on the girls, even when the boyfriend is there. He goes and scans their items, and he made a one hundred deck of business cards that has his cell phone number on it. And when he gets the bag to put the items in, he slips the card in there and winks at them. Only when the boyfriend isn't paying attention. Now, not saying it wasn't a good idea, but one day he'll catch the wrong man and the wrong woman who checks in her bag and tells her boyfriend. And me? I'll stand there with my phone recording how stupid he is. It was a good plan, well, a decent one, but I have a better one. My looks will get any girl and I never had a rejection, EVER! I will never have one either because women love Vin (which is me). And I will always love the good looking women.