CHAPTER 13

I woke up the next morning with a serious head ache, I also had a running nose due to the rain of the previous day,

I was doing all this for a reason, taking so much shit from that nut head,

I stood up from the bed and my whole body weight rested gallantly on my legs, I was feeling so heavy today maybe it was because of the way I was feeling, yeah I wasn't feeling really good,

I walked into the bathroom to take a look at myself in the mirror,

I was pale as fuck, my lips were still very cold and colorless, I had bore sacks beneath my eyes,

Look what he was turning me into, a fucking living dead body,

I was messed up, big time.

*you don't look go*mama said as I walked into the kitchen

*i feel worst*i said walking towards the refrigerator to get some milk,

*you need to lie down*she said

looking at me like I was going to fall down any minute,

*stop looking at me like that, this is partly your fault*I said,

And it was true in some way, I blamed her for what was happening and probably what was to come

*what did I do?*she asked,

I took out the milk from the refrigerator

And looked at her,

*dont act like you don't know what I'm talking about, you always do that and that's not fair, I know you and Morris's father had already talked behind my back and without letting me know, you decide what you think is best for me....*I said raising my voice a little bit,

*I'm your mother, I know what you need*she said,

Honestly, that was the best reply she could give right now,

*well, thank you for knowing what I need cause all i needed in my life right now was more shit*i said taking the glass of milk and leaving the kitchen,

Well, that's just fucking pleasant, I said to myself seeing Morris at the entrance of the kitchen, relaxing by the wall,

Probably listening to me and mama argue because of him and his bloody household, I looked at him to see if he had any remorse but there nothing there, just emptiness, that was all I could see.

After hours of trying to sleep, which was futile by the way and restless turning, I got up from my bed and sat down, this room, this house was suffocating, I needed fresh air,

I got up and walked out of the room, it was dark already, I guess when you're caught up in your room, time just bloody flies.

As I stepped outside, i could feel the breeze crawling beneath my clothes, nothing in my life right now felt better than this, this house could make anybody go mad, and the people in it,

I walked into the garden and fell to the ground staring up at the stars, I remember my papa telling me to always be like the stars, that like them  no amount of darkness can prevent them from shining,

*what are you doing?*his voice pulled me out of whatever it was I was having,

I sat up and folded my legs to my chest

He sat down beside me, everything about him always changed how I felt, i was so mad at him but there was something very compelling about him that made me melt every damn time,

*what do you want?*I asked gently, not that I had any strength to yell at him,

*I didn't realize you were compelled  into this relationship too*he said

*you think*I murmured out,

*I think from now on we should try and get along, that way this all blows always faster*he said waiting for me to say something else,

Every other guy will start with an apology but I guess he wasn't every other guy, he was Morris Lugard rude and ignorant as fuck and he wasn't sorry about it,

*okay*that was the only thing I could say to him, I watched as he got up and left, i was back to sitting under the stars alone.