The Reaper’s Line of Sight

Earth...

Pit and Jared rush to the door to start the adventure.

"Here we go!" Pit said, happily.

"I'm so excited for this adventure. Wherever it may be." Jared said, looking over at Pit.

Pit and Jared leaps through the door and flies through the air.

"So, what's our mission this time?" Pit asked.

"You remember Reapers, don't you? From the Underworld?" Palutena asked, telepathically.

"Not those guys!" Pit said.

Jared closed his eyes to picture the classic, 8-bit appearance of the Reaper from the original Kid Icarus.

"They're always freaking out and calling in their little Reapettes. Ugh, I'm getting worked up just thinking about it!" Pit said.

"And I really don't want to mess with Calli, not today." Jared said, sadly. "She is gonna kill me if I do."

"Yes, anyway...about the Reapers…" Palutena said, telepathically.

"Sorry, sorry, go on." Pit said.

"They have a fortress near the entrance to the Underworld in Reaper Valley."

"Heh. Which is where? Reaper Boulevard? But seriously, thank goodness we don't have to go there, right?"

"..."

"That silence means we have to go there, doesn't it? Will you at least tell us why you want to go to a place crawling with Reapers?" Pit asked.

"And can you tell us why you want us to go to Calli's home turf?" Jared asked, holding his bow and arrow.

Underworld…

"You talking about visiting my home?" Calli asked, telepathically.

"Oh, Calliope Mori. Just the idol reaper I was looking for. I'm trying to find another one of Medusa's commanders, Pandora." Palutena said, telepathically.

Jared closed his eyes to imagine the classic, 8-bit appearance of Pandora from the original Kid Icarus.

"The goddess of disaster and calamity? THAT Pandora?" Pit asked.

"Yes, and she's currently residing in the Labyrinth of Deceit...however, some force in the Reaper fortress is obscuring the labyrinth's location. I can't find it, not even with my all-seeing Eye of Palutena." Palutena said, telepathically.

"It isn't me, that's for sure. I was having problems with playing Minecraft with my daughter. And I don't know where the Labyrinth of Deceit is." Calli said, telepathically.

"Wait, Lady Palutena, if you have an all-seeing eye, and if Calli doesn't know where it is, why can't you see Pandora's location?" Pit asked.

"Because of my slightly botched laser eye surgery." Palutena said, telepathically.

"Are you messing with me again?" Pit asked.

"She is." Jared said, sadly.

"Maybe. Regardless, your job for now is to infiltrate the Reaper fortress!" Palutena said, telepathically.

"R-roger that!" Pit said.

"I really don't want to get to Calli's home without her permission." Jared said.

As Pit and Jared continue, they spot red dots in the distance.

"Not unless it's Kiara. But she's back in Australia." Calli said, telepathically.

"What are those red lights?" Pit asked.

"They look like something from laser tag." Jared said.

"Are they…" Palutena said, as red lasers suddenly shoot out from the dots. "...Reaper eyes?!"

"This is really bad!" Pit said.

"Sorry!" Calli said, telepathically. "I don't want to attack you."

Pit and Jared narrowly dodges the red lasers.

"Calli, please don't get mad at me when this is all over." Jared said, frowning.

"We need to find the both of you a safe route." Palutena said, as a ravine comes into view. "Down there is your only option!" She sends Pit and Jared into the ravine. "This ravine should take you to the Reaper fortress. But it's tight, so be careful. If you get stuck, I won't have time to get you out."

"Man, things are really heating up! Time to bust through here! Full speed ahead!" Pit said.

"Excellent idea, Pit. Naturally, I had the same thought. Let me help." Palutena said, telepathically.

As Pit and Jared maneuvers through the ravine, a large gust of wind appears.

"Why is it so windy?" Jared asked. "So...cold…"

"Is that a windstorm up ahead?! Hang on!" Palutena said, telepathically.

Palutena sends Pit and Jared through the windstorm.

"Ow!" Pit said.

"Gah…" Jared said. "That hurt!"

"Don't be babies. It's only wind. I mean, at least it's not poison or acid wind. Then the two of you would be in real trouble." Palutena said, telepathically.

"Ooh, lucky me." Pit said, sarcastically.

"I really love this." Jared said, frowning.

"You're heading into a cave now. Be careful!" Palutena said.

"I don't want you hurt, okay? We had to be on opposing sides today." Calli said, telepathically.

Pit and Jared pass through the cave.

"There are many enemies ahead!" Palutena said, telepathically.

"We'll take care of 'em!" Pit said.

"Why'd we stop?" Jared asked.

Pit and Jared abruptly stops at a wall.

"This looks like a dead end. There must be a way out...hmm…" Palutena said, telepathically.

"Oh yeah, Calli, isn't your birthday coming soon?" Jared asked.

"It is. I'm releasing a new single. I hope you're looking forward to it." Calli said, telepathically.

"April the Fourth?"

"Yeah."

"Down there! I'm getting you both out!" Palutena said, telepathically.

Palutena sends Pit and Jared through another cave.

"The Underworld forces really stepped up their game!" Pit said.

"This is so annoying." Jared said, taking out another Underworld troop. "Why is that?"

"I doubt those underlings managed it on their own. It's a sure sign that Medusa is back in power." Palutena said, and the exit of the cave comes into view. "You're almost there! 3... 2... 1... Contact!"

Reaper Fortress…

"Calli!" Jared said, angrily.

Pit and Jared arrive at the Reaper Fortress, where red lasers shoot at tiem from all directions.

"I said I'm sorry!" Calli said, telepathically.

"Whoooaaa! It's hot hot HOT here!" Pit said.

"There's no chance of getting in from above. You'll have to break through the front." Palutena said.

Palutena sends Pit and Jared through the front of the fortress.

"Here we gooooo!" Pit said.

Pit and Jared arrives inside the fortress, collapsed on the ground.

"Pit! Are you all right?" Palutena asked.

Pit gets to his feet, "Never...better…"

"How about you, my deadbeat?" Calli asked, telepathically.

"Lasers? Really? Why couldn't you go with a light show?" Jared asked.

"I had to keep the place defended. Hope you're not mad at me."

"No, I'm not."

"Then let's get moving. The force obscuring Pandora is deep within this fortress." Palutena sisd, telepathically.

Pit and Jared proceeds to the doorway to the right.

"Reapers may look all evil and crazy, but there's a good reason for that. They ARE evil and crazy." Palutena said, telepathically.

"I take great offense to that." Calli said, telepathically.

"Everyone except Calli, of course. But here's a little tip: they won't bother you if you stay out of their sight."

Pit and Jared enter an enclosed space full of enemies.

"Considering this is the Reaper fortress, there really aren't very many Reapers." Pit said.

"There must be a huge soul harvest going on somewhere." Palutena said, telepathically.

"Which is where I'm at." Calli said, telepathically.

"I thought you were in Japan." Jared said, frowning.

"I use magic to go down to the Underworld and back to the surface."

"Oh. I get it."

"What do you mean? What soul harvest?" Pit asked.

"Reapers are soul carriers. When a being dies, they take its soul to the Underworld. The humans probably started another war, which means a lot more souls to deal with." Palutena said, telepathically.

"Why are they always fighting? It's so sad and pointless." Pit said.

"Yes, but we gods fight too, and when we do, humans are always caught in the middle."

"So, this war against the Underworld Army is causing the Reapers to work overtime." Pit said.

"And I'm one of the Reapers forced to work overtime. Due to the war." Calli said, telepathically.

"I'M the one who should be working overtime. Not you, Calli. Then there'd be less soul harvesting...humans get frustrated, even destructive, when we gods don't provide for their welfare." Palutena said, telepathically.

"Don't be ridiculous! Everyone loves the goddess of light! You know that!" Pit said, excitedly.

"You're amazing, Palutena! You're as awesome as the Law of Cycles! You're smarter than me even in the simplest of things." Jared said, smiling.

"Thank you, Pit, Jared. I do my best. Now, then...let's proceed." Palutena said, telepathically.

Pit and Jared break open the boulder obscuring a secret area.

"Cool! A hidden area!" Jared said, happily. "I love secret areas."

"Head inside." Palutena said, telepathically.

Pit and Jared fall into the ditch with an Orne.

"Uh-oh. There's an Orne around you, Pit, Jared. I forgot one was there on guard duty." Calli said, telepathically.

"Is it the floating skull? And how do you know what we're seeing?" Jared asked, telepathically.

"Yes. I do. You left your Augma feed up. I have access to it on my phone. The slightest touch from one of those Orne will annihilate you."

"That sounds painful. Not to mention totally unfair!" Pit said, annoyed.

"More unfair than knowing how good Watson is at shooters." Jared said, crossing his arms.

"Fair or not, just stay away from it. Try breaking nearby rocks to find a way out." Palutena said, telepathically.

Jared broke a nearby rock and he hops onto a Grind Rail with Pit.

"Whoa-ho-ho! Nice!" Pit said.

"That's a grind rail. It beats walking, huh? You can ride it right into the courtyard." Palutena said, telepathically.

"Y'know, Kiara isn't going to Australia. But Austria." Calli said, telepathically.

"Was the Australia thing for the memes?" Jared asked.

"It was. Have you ever been to Austria?"

Jared got off the grind rail with Pit.

"I have. Been to Salzburg. Nice city." Jared said, looking around the place. "Loved it when I visited that place in 2014."

Pit and Jared proceed through the fortress and enter a room with an Eggplant Wizard.

"Not this guy!" Pit said, annoyed.

"An Eggplant Wizard!" Palutena said, telepathically.

"But I don't want to be an eggplant again!"

"Way back when, you had to visit a nurse to get fixed up, remember?"

"I was there so much, they named the place after me: hosPITal. Get it?"

"..."

"Really?" Calli asked, telepathically. "Really?"

"It's funny. It's OK to laugh." Pit said.

"No, it's really not. Anyway, there aren't any hospitals when there are Kid Icarus Uprising chapters in the fan fiction." Palutena said, telepathically.

"Great, I can't believe that I'll be an aubergenius." Jared said, coming up with a bad pun.

"I thought Ina was bad enough with puns. Now I have to deal with Jared, Pit, and Palutena." Calli said, telepathically.

"We're Ina-cent. Sorry if our puns are Pit-iful"

"WHAT?! No hospitals?! But what are we gonna do?! If me and Jared are turned into eggplants?!" Pit exclaimed.

"Calm down, Pit. I can help you and Jared with this, too. If the both of you are turned into an eggplant, my powers will transform you back. After a while." Palutena said, telepathically.

"Thanks, Lady Palutena!" Pit said.

Jared took out the Eggplant Wizard with ease.

Pit and Jared enter a room with swinging blades.

"Those blades look like they could really put a hurt on someone." Pit said.

"Be careful not to fall." Palutena said, telepathically.

Pit and Jared fall into the ditch with a Clubberskull.

"Oof!" Pit said.

"Gah...that hurt…" Jared said, sadly.

"Don't panic, Pit, Jared, but there's a Clubberskull nearby. It's trapped for now, so I suggest leaving it alone. It's one dangerous enemy." Palutena said, telepathically.

Jared had his bow behind his back and it accidentally attacked the Clubberskull.

"Shit!" Jared said, terrified.

"The Clubberskull's loose! Get out of there!" Calli said, telepathically.

Pit and Jared approaches the level 5 Intensity Gate for the first time on an intensity lower than 5.0.

"I don't think I can get through this way." Pit said.

"For now, why don't you just go back?" Palutena asked, telepathically.

Jared's eyes glowed gold for a moment and it increased the intensity he was in with Pit. His eyes went back to the brown hue it was before.

"What happened?" Jared asked.

Pit and Jared opens the level 5 Intensity Gate on a subsequent playthrough after triggering the previous dialogue beforehand.

"Oh, I guess we can get through here now." Pit said.

"That's because Jared raised the Intensity level!" Calli said, telepathically.

"Can someone tell me what happened?" Jared asked.

Pit and Jared proceed through the fortress.

"Your eyes glowed gold." Calli said, telepathically.

"There are Reapers creeping around in there. They'll summon Reapettes if they see you, so be careful." Palutena said, telepathically.

In the room with Reapers lurking around, a random conversation may trigger.

"Glowing gold? As in god mode?" Jared asked.

"Yes." Calli said, telepathically.

"How?"

"You started having visions after Manhattan, right? After wanting to change the future constantly."

"Well, yeah. But how does that explain me having god mode? Doesn't that make me more overpowered?"

After Pit and Jared enters a room full of the enemies and defeats them, a Grind Rail appears.

"Nice, another grind rail." Pit said.

"This one works a bit differently. As you're riding it, shoot the targets on the walls. This will extend the rail to your destination." Palutena said, telepathically.

"That sounds easy enough." Pit said.

"It does." Jared said, happily.

"Just keep in mind that the two of you can try it as many times as you need to." Palutena said, telepathically.

Pit and Jared take an elevator to a lower floor, where he encounters two different Hot Spring rooms.

"Well, well. It appears that this place is equipped with some hot springs." Palutena said, telepathically.

"Woo hoo! I could use a little R and R right about now!" Pit said, telepathically.

Pit and Jared approach the purple Hot Spring room.

"There's something strange about this hot spring…" Palutena said, telepathically.

"Huh?" Pit asked.

"What's wrong with the hot spring?" Jared asked.

"The steam seems a little...evil." Palutena said, telepathically.

"Uuhh...that's probably not a good sign. We'll just keep moving." Pit said.

"Shame. I would have really loved to sit back and relax." Jared said, letting out a sigh.

Pit and Jared heads down a hall with guillotines.

"You're closing in on the force that's obscuring Pandora's location." Palutena said, telepathically.

"Yeah, I figured the evil lighting wasn't just for show." Pit said.

Pit and Jared heads through the doorway.

"I could watch a show right now. Maybe it could involve some Chuggaaconroy playing Xenoblade Chronicles 2." Jared said, happily.

Pit and Jared enter a room with a single Reaper patrolling the area. The Reaper then notices them and transforms into the Great Reaper.

"No way!" Pit said.

"It's gigantic!" Palutena said, telepathically.

"Jared, meet my boss in this fan fiction. Sorry that you're up against him right now." Calli said, telepathically.

"Man, I so wish you were the Grim Reaper's apprentice." Jared said, annoyed.

The battle initiates.

"What IS that thing?" Pit asked.

"That Great Reaper must be the one who's hidden Pandora's Labyrinth of Deceit. This area is split into two levels, so just switch levels depending on how it attacks." Palutena said, telepathically.

"You say that like it's easy!" Pit said.

"That's because it IS easy!" Palutena said.

"Easy? How is this easy?" Jared asked.

"I really am sorry…" Calli said, telepathically. "Uh. How do you want me to repay you?"

"You give me an all-nighter with karaoke."

"I thought you had Gura for that."

"I do, but…"

"Those aren't just flirty looks coming from the Great Reaper's eyes!" Palutena said, telepathically.

"Lemme guess...they're death rays?!" Pit exclaimed.

"At least it isn't a Death Star. But death rays really do piss me off!" Jared said, angrily.

"In a nutshell. Plus, if you get hit, it'll summon Reapettes. That Great Reaper has quite the evil eye." Palutena said.

"How can you make puns at a time like this?!" Pit exclaimed.

"I guess I just don't SEE the problem with a little levity."

"Ugh! You're killing us here!" Pit said.

"I would rather joke around with a shark at Atlantis or an octopus eventually. In two of these chapters." Jared said, trying to take out the Great reaper. "Ugh. Where are it's weak points again?"

"I think I've found the Great Reaper's weak points. They're its head and little toes." Palutena said, telepathically.

"Oh, yeah! Stubbing those guys hurts like crazy!" Pit said.

"It hurts as much as stepping on LEGO bricks." Jared said, looking at Pit.

"Totally."

"But it's more effective to target the head. The head is a weak spot for many enemies and...most living things." Palutena said, telepathically.

"Can you not bring up Mami Tomoe, Akai Haato, and Haachama?!" Jared exclaimed. "They really god ahead of themselves."

Once enough damage is dealt, light will begin to shine from the center of the Great Reaper's forehead.

"Now! Finish it!" Palutena said, telepathically.

"But...how?" Pit asked.

"The light coming from its head. Strike there!"

"Gotcha!" Pit said.

"Sorry, Calliope Mori." Jared said, sadly.

Pit and Jared defeats the Great Reaper.

"It's fine." Calli said, telepathically. "I'm, I'm not mad at you."

"All done!" Pit said.

"Nice work, Pit, Jared!" Palutena said, telepathically.

Epilogue.

Light bursts from the Great Reaper's head as it falls to the ground, and Pit and Jared begin to walk away.

"You know what, Lady Palutena?" Pit asked.

"What's that, Pit?" Palutena asked, telepathically.

"Even though I almost died, I've really enjoyed our time together."

"Aw, you poor guy. You really need to make some friends. Jared has the biggest family in the multiverse, maybe you can try to make friends with them." Palutena said, telepathically.

Pit's eyes widen and he scratches his head.

"I could introduce you to Team RWBY at some point." Jared said, smiling.

A light then shines down on Pit and Jared.

"Not in the Kid Icarus Uprising chapters in this fanfiction series. I don't want us to repeat RWBY Uprising. We can have them meet in the other franchises in this narrative. Now let's go find Pandora!" Palutena said, telepathically.

Palutena whisks Pit and Jared away.