Evil Plans

In a space of pure whiteness, the giant blocky title and a certain rose emblem drop from the sky to the ground, where the four miniaturized members of Team RWBY pop out from behind it to smile, wave and adopt poses for the audience while an unseen speaker announces the show as: 'RWBY CHIBI'!

Beacon Academy kitchen...

In the Beacon Academy kitchen, Ruby Rose struggles to open a jar of pickles while Jared Shay is eating some cookies and cream Pocky.

"Urgh! Open up, jar! Release my tasty pickles!" Ruby said, angrily.

Sun Wukong strolls over confidently, "Need some help?"

"Fine, but only because I'm starving." Ruby said, letting out a sigh. "And Jared doesn't want to help."

"I don't want to help you because I don't want to make a mess, Little Red." Jared said, a Pocky sticking out of his mouth.

Ruby hands Sun the jar.

"Okay. Let Sun handle this." Ruby said, frowning.

"Let me show you how a real man handles this. Since one of your best friends isn't a man." Sun said.

Sun struggles for a few moments, but is unsuccessful in opening the jar, "They sure make the lids tight on these plastic jars."

"Aww, I guess that means no pickles for me." Ruby said, sadly.

"Why don't we ask Yang for help?" Sun asked.

"No! You never ask Yang for help with jars!" Ruby said, worried.

"With jars or with pots! That's why I don't play Legend of Zelda in VR with her!" Jared said, looking at Sun.

"Why not?" Sun asked, looking between Ruby and Jared.

Yang Xiao Long comes bounding in, "My big sister sense is tingling! What's that? A jar of pickles?!"

Ruby hides the jar behind her back, "Uh, No! who said anything about pickles? I don't want any pickles."

"But you said you were starving!" Sun said, looking at Ruby.

"Sun...shut...up..." Jared said, letting out a sigh.

"I knew it!" Yang said, grabbing the jar of pickles. "You dare to make my baby sister hungry?!"

Ruby and Jared dive out of the way and the two tackle Sun clear of Yang.

"This isn't gonna be pretty." Jared said, looking up at Yang.

"You're going down, jar!" Yang said, angrily.

"Oh no..." Ruby said, hugging Jared. "Why did I get the jar of pickles?"

"I don't know..." Jared said, squeezing Ruby's body hard. "I should have stopped you."

"Uh..." Sun said.

From off-screen, plates, bowls, potted plants and Zwei go flying around the kitchen, as a roaring, rumbling sound is heard.

"Face...my...fury!" Yang said.

A loud gunshot from Ember Celica is heard, and the lid of the jar comes rolling over, settling in front of Ruby and Jared and a very stunned Sun.

"Here you go, sis! All you had to do was ask." Yang said.

"Yeah...thanks." Ruby said, while Jared lets go of her. "Um, at least we didn't ask Hibiki for help."

"Yeah. That would have been worse." Jared said, looking at Yang.

Yang sticks her hand in the jar to grab a pickle, but her hand gets stuck inside, "Oh, you just don't know when to quit, do you?"

"Run!" Ruby said, terrified.

"We can't stay here!" Jared said, looking at Sun.

Sun screams. Ruby, Jared, Sun, and Zwei run away as Yang grins and brandishes her fist at the jar.

Cinder Fall's dorm room...

Ominous operatic music plays in Cinder Fall's dorm room. On a whiteboard, under the title 'Ultimate Evil Plans', blueprints of Beacon Academy and Beowolves are pinned up, along with the words 'Chaos = Yes Please!', 'Hugs = No!', 'Grimms = Lots & Lots!' and 'Puppies = Probably Not'.

"My evil plans are all coming together!! Now, we just have to make sure nobody discovers who we really are!" Cinder said, laughing evilly.

"Then...maybe we shouldn't have the evil plans out in the open like that?" Emerald asked, gesturing to the prominently labelled whiteboard.

"It's fine!" Cinder said, waving a hand at Emerald dismissively.

At that moment, Ruby, Jared, and Nora Valkyrie burst into the room cheerfully and start prance around.

"Hellooo...new friends!" Ruby said, holding Jared's hand.

"Hey. What's up?" Jared asked, fixated on the whiteboard.

A shocked Cinder and Emerald hurriedly stand in front of the whiteboard of their evil plans.

"Not evil!" Cinder said.

"Uhh, what?" Ruby asked.

"Nothing! What do you want?"

"We came to invite you to our BFF party!" Ruby said, holding her other hand with Nora. "In which we invite new people we barely know to become our BFFs!"

"I have a lot of BFFs across the multiverse. Um, how about you guys become some of them?" Jared asked.

Cinder sticks her tongue out in disgust.

"Of course you do." Emerald said, sarcastically.

"Right. Forgot you're too early, Emerald." Jared said, still staring at the white board.

"What have you been staring at Jared? Hey, what's this?" Nora asked, pointing towards the whiteboard.

"Get away from there!" Cinder said, jumping and flips the whiteboard around, slamming it down on Emerald's head in the process. "It's nothing!"

"Really? 'Cause it kinda looks like some sort of elaborate scheme."

"It looks like an evil plan. Is it an evil plan?" Jared asked.

"Well, it's not evil, if that's what you're thinking." Cinder said.

"Then, uhh, what is it?" Ruby asked.

"It's a...recipe! For a cake. For charity. For, uh..." Cinder said.

"Kittens?" Emerald asked.

"Kittens? Will you have puppies too?" Jared asked.

Ruby, Nora, and Jared look at Cinder and Emerald skeptically for a moment.

"That...sounds...amazing!" Ruby said.

"Kitten charity?!" Nora exclaimed.

"I am one for kittens. If you can do puppies as well. Then I'm all in for it." Jared said, happily.

"Fine. We'll be doing kittens first. And then puppies later." Cinder said.

Ruby, Nora, and Jared high-five.

"I knew you guys were BFF material! Oh, you're so nice!" Ruby said, smiling.

"And totally not evil!" Nora said, excitedly.

"Not evil at all. And had someone switch sides." Jared said, grabbing Ruby's hand.

Mercury Black saunters in, casually holding a rocket launcher of some description, "What up, evil dudes? Got the Kitten Killer 9000 up and ready to..."

Cinder scampers behind the whiteboard and Emerald stands frozen in shock.

Mercury sees Nora, Ruby, and Jared standing in the room and stops in his tracks. He looks at them in stunned silence for a moment before slowly backing out of the room the way he came.

"O-kay..." Mercury said.

"Anyway... See ya later, besties!" Ruby said, completely unphased.

"See ya, Cinder, Mercury, and Emerald!" Jared said, squeezing Ruby's hand.

Ruby, Nora, and Jared skip out of the room.

"They're messing with us, right? Especially with one of us switching sides?" Emerald asked, turning to Cinder.

Beacon Academy kitchen...

In the Beacon Academy kitchen, Ruby cheerfully puts a cake into the oven and brushes her hands in satisfaction while Jared is drinking a mint chocolate chip milkshake.

"Man, I'll never get tired of this." Jared said, leaning against the wall.

Weiss pops out from behind Ruby and leans over to her.

"What are you doing?" Weiss asked.

"Just makin' a cake." Ruby said.

"Yourself? You didn't ask Jared? You're working by yourself? That's ridiculous. Why don't you just have your cake butler bring you one?" Weiss asked.

"Cake butler...?" Ruby asked, thinking for a moment.

"What's a cake butler?" Jared asked.

"Uhh, yes? That butler in charge of cakes? Of all the butlers, I like him the best." Weiss said.

A thought bubble appears by Weiss' head. Inside, the cake butler dutifully produces a pink cake topped with a cherry.

"The both of you do have one, don't you? We had four back at Atlas." Weiss said.

"Can you both just watch my cake for a minute? I'll be right back." Ruby said, letting out a sigh before walking away.

"I don't really do the whole cooking thing? Actually, I don't spend much time in the... 'food room'...? at all." Weiss said.

"It's called a kitchen, Weiss. Just watch the oven with Jared." Ruby said.

"Don't touch anything on the oven, Ice Queen." Jared said, sipping on his milkshake. "I'm gonna watch Finana play Genshin Impact."

"Okay. I promise I won't touch anything." Weiss said, smiling.

Jared took out his iPad Pro and his earbuds. He loaded up HoloDex to watch some of his favorite VTubers. Weiss looks at Ruby's cake as it bakes.

"Alright, oven. Don't start any trouble and there won't be any trouble. Hmm, I wonder what all these buttons do." Weiss said.

5 MINUTES LATER.

Ruby walks in to find Jared staring at the oven figuring out what to do as the kitchen drapes on fire and thick black smoke emanating from the oven, while Weiss runs around helplessly in circles.

"Run away! Run away from the fire!" Weiss said, worried.

Jared quickly uses a fire extinguisher to put out all the fires.

"I was only gone for five minutes! What happened!?" Ruby exclaimed.

"Weiss pressed buttons like we were on an adventure with the Doctor! I told her not to press any buttons and she did it anyway!" Jared said, looking at Ruby.

"Are you kidding me?! Weiss!"

"Since when are drapes flammable?" Weiss asked.

"Since always, Weiss! Drapes have always been flammable!" Ruby said, angrily.

Ruby walks over to the oven and sees that her cake has been burned beyond recognition. She reverently places a sheet on top of it.

"Goodbye, my delicious friend. You never had a chance." Ruby said, tearfully.

"And there goes the cake I was gonna share with you, Ruby..." Jared said, sadly.

"Yeah. We were gonna split it and drink some tea with it."

"I warned you, Ruby, Jared. This really is both of your fault, if you think about it." Weiss said, looking between Ruby and Jared.

"At least help us clean up this mess!" Ruby said, annoyed.

"Yeah. I said not to touch anything! Help us clean this up before Yang or Blake sees it!" Jared said, crossing his arms.

"What exactly do you mean by 'clean up'?" Weiss asked, looking between Ruby and Jared.

Ruby and Jared seethes with anger.

"You'll clean this up and you'll like it." Jared said, dousing Weiss down with a spray from the fire extinguisher. "You got yourself into the mix. You'll fix it."

Weiss shrieks.

"Ask your cake butler." Ruby said, sarcastically.

"Nice one, Ruby. Want to make some macaroons with Miku and Shirabe?" Jared asked.

"Sure." Ruby said, walking away with Jared.

Jared throws the fire extinguisher to Ruby who throws it back from off-screen, nailing Weiss in the head.