Felt Nervous

We walk out of the School and went to where his car parked then stepped closer to it and got in.

I glance at him and stared for awhile while he was rummaging and finally got into his car. He turned to me and raise an eyebrow at me.

"aren't you gonna tell me about it?"

Fernand turned his head and looked at me then shook.

"I told you Khiella, it was nothing"

I don't believe in him saying that it was just nothing because I felt it.

I keep quiet until we arrive to where we are going to. We got out of the car and then roamed my eyes to the place where we are right now.

It was an very expensive shop for wedding gowns, dresses and others luxurious things.

We walk in the inside and went to the direct shop where the dresses and gowns for the groom and bride. It took me a second before realizing that I was here because of the wedding they are planning for me and Ezriel.

Is they really serious about it? Because I'm still not into it.

While roaming my eyes to the place, accidentally saw a woman that was familiar to me. I don't know where did I see her or where did we meet before if it is.

"Khiella"

I heard someone called me then I turned to the woman who just called me. She smiled at me and move closer for a beso.

"hi glad you came here. I was waiting for you to come 1 in a half hour so I thought you are not going here. But I was wrong because you came."

I smiled at her then we walk towards the woman holding a beautiful and very stunning gown then held it to us.

Ezriel's mother get it and handed to me while genuinely smiling to me so I grab at and observe.

" that's what you choose at the album I gave to you. See? It's so beautiful. Come on wear it"

She said and then pulled me to the dressing room. I turned my head to where Fernand is and looked at him. He just shrug his shoulder and then sat down to the couch and grab his phone then shove it to his pocket.

I rolled my eyes and went to the fitting room and wear the gown after I completely wear it. I stare myself at the mirror in front of me and then suddenly felt an uncomfortable feeling.

Do you know the feeling that you want to refuse something, but can't do anything at all just to agree even if it's you are very disagree?. It really sucks right?.

How will I refuse this if it has a part of me that wanted this too?. It's hard, really hard.

But I am trying my best to stop this feelings I have right now because I know that in the end. I was the one whose gonna be a loser.

I really am gonna be.

I got interrupted to my depth thoughts when the lady who will assist me came and told me that I have to went out. And show it to Ezriel's mother. So I came out and his mother and Fernand was there waiting for me to come out of the fitting room.

She immediately approached me and then looked at me head to toe then smile very lovely.

"owh. You look so gorgeous. It really perfectly fits to you"

I smiled at her and then looked at the huge mirror in front of us and see how it looks like to me even if I saw it already awhile ago.

"Fernand what do you think?. I am right is it?. It will be perfectly fits to her."

I turned to Fernand and caught him just staring at me like he was so amazed by he just saw right now.

He immediately looked away and fake a cough then said.

"well not really. But yeah it fits to her"

He said then walk away from us and went to lady who will assist him too.

"see? even Fernand got amaze because it is true that you are so gorgeous. God is just very great and good creator for creating a human beings like you that are almost look like a goddess".

I don't know if I should take it as a compliment. because seriously that's too much. 

She went to my insight and stared at me.

"owh I really loved the color of your eyes. It's very magnetic and attractive".

I felt so weird towards her because of what she is telling me right now. I cannot believe her statement about me.

While staring at me she turned to the mirror and stare at me there and then said.

"you know what Khiella. I don't believe in what others or should I say the proverbs that 'at the back of  gorgeous good looking psychical appearance is a hidden very dark secret'. Do you also believe in that?"

Suddenly I felt like she said it in purpose because it slapped and hit me hard. I know that she didn't mean to say that, to offend me or what 'cause at the first place she know nothing. She doesn't know about it. We just meet and don't know each other very well.

She then looked at me while waiting for me to answer her but I just can't answer her right now. But I did my best to act so calm and do not looked so affected.

I did my best to act so cool and then force a smile that I hope she didn't notice that it was a fake smile.

"uhm. Well I don't also believe it. Because not all people has a very good looking features is have that very dark side 'cause everyone even the one who don't have a good physical appearance has a dark side. Any of us, we people have the worst and bad side we could be."

I said and then walk towards the fitting room to change and also to avoid her gaze and to what she is going to say again.

"you impress me Khiella. You are a wise woman and I know you're the one for my son. I'm so glad that he chose you. And now you two are getting married sooner."

"I'm so excited".

She said and I was just surprised and glad too at same time that she did not notice about how I'm struggling in answering her. Because it hits me

But well I considered myself as not a beautiful or pretty person because of something I wanted to forget and want it to get burned.

I don't want to be pretty anymore. I hate myself so much. I want to start a new life now.

After changing and wear my uniform again. I went out to the fitting room and then saw Fernand was the only one left in there.

"Auntie has an emergency so she didn't get a chance to say her goodbye because it was an very urgent."

I just nodded and then followed him. We thank those stuffs and went out then went to the parking lot and walk closer to his car and got into it.

"now it's already six filthy five, so if you don't mind if we're going to a restaurant to eat because I'm so hungry right now. I've been waiting there for an hours. And it really starve me."

I nodded and then he drived to the restaurant he was talking about and then immediately got out of the car and went inside after he parked the car.

It is not obvious that he is very hungry right.

I just shook my head and followed him. Then we sat down to table we got for the two of us and ordered our foods. I'm also hungry anyway so it is good that we are here.

While waiting our foods to be served. I asked him again about Ezriel and he patiently shook his head and telling me it was just nothing repeatedly.

But I just couldn't believe it. I know it has something about it.

"so Fernand---"

He didn't let me finish to what I was going to say. He immediately spoke up and then shook his head.

"I know what you are going to say. You will asked me about it."

I stared at him for a second and then realized how did he know. Of course his an Psychology. He can reads actions and human minds. Why did I forget about that?.

"just answer me Fernand"

He immediately said 'No' then stopped when our foods finally served to us and starts to eat. I'm just watching, looking at him while eating and it makes him uncomfortable so he looked up and raise an eyebrow to me.

"what's with that look Khiella?"

I smirked and ate my food while still eyes on him. He frowned and I smirked more.

"what is in your mind?"

He said and then so I smiled very sweet to me.

"You guess it"

Fernand frowned to what I said and it makes me smirked again.

"I don't know Khiella."

I chuckled to teased him.

"owh I thought you are a very good psychologist?. Why can't read me right now huh?"

I said teasingly to him and he crossed his arms while staring at me intently. We just stared at each other and just got interrupted by someone who fake a cough to get our attention.

" hi Khiella and Fernand. Didn't know you two were here. What a coincidence"

Eman said and then smiled at us then proceeded to the table next to our table.

"nice seeing you here. I'm here for a meeting. I'm just waiting for Ezriel to arrived and our clients."

He said and then ordered a drinks and foods. Suddenly I felt so nervous after hearing his name and knowing that Ezriel are also coming here for a meeting.

My heart suddenly beat faster. I don't know why do I felt nervous. It's just him right, it's just him.

This is really frustrating.

I hurried to finish my food and then looked at Fernand who is just very calm while eating.

"aren't you going to hurry up Fernand?"

He looked at me then shrug his shoulder.

"can't you see? I'm still eating and it's wrongly hurriedly consuming food. Also why in a hurry?"

"it seems like it has something or someone you wanted to avoid or what else"

Great. Do I look very obvious? I felt ashamed of myself. Why am I being stupid again. Stop being obvious.

"owh don't worry Khiella you are not that very obvious"

Fernand said and then give me annoying smile. I glared at him and slap his arm then sat properly.

"I hate you!. What are you talking about?!"

I said very irritated and then turned to Eman who is now looking at us. He immediately looked away and then drink a water.

"what Khiella?. I didn't say anything and I don't care if you'll hate me. I did not do anything to you"

I rolled my eyes at him and then grab my phone and then shove it to my small shoulder bag.

"well you know what Khiella. Why don't you asked Ezriel about it?. Why to me?. But then as I told you, it was just nothing. So you don't have to be so curious and pursue to know about it".

Fernand said so I rolled my eyes again and then turned to Eman and saw him looking to someone who is now walking into the entrance of the restaurant. I immediately looked away and accidentally stop to Fernand's stare. He looked away and quickly stood up so I did it too.

"now are we really going?"

I asked and he just nodded then turned to Eman who is now looking at us and then approached Ezriel.

He looked so handsome as always but it always amaze me in a different reason that I don't know.