Chapter 12: Love?

“Is this love,” Eliana questions herself as she brushes locks of Jasper’s hair away from his forehead. He is still sweating profusely, so most of his body is drenched.

“No, it could not possibly be.” Right? Eliana caresses his features with her eyes, running the length of his jawline and his thick brow, reveling in how perfect it is. His lips, plump and bright red from the fever, are open just slightly enough in order for him to breathe from it. His eyelashes are thick and full, hugging his cheeks beautifully.

Envy bites at Eliana’s heart before it is taken over by a fluttering heat.

“I mean, what other reason could explain my excessive reaction when he was injured in battle, or my obsession with making sure he is safe?” She ponders all of this to herself, not quite sure what to believe.

“What are you thinking about as you stare at me.”

Jasper’s sudden voice shatters Eliana’s reverie, causing her to jump back, landing on her bad ankle. She winces and tumbles to the ground.

“Eliana,” he sits up quickly, his dark gaze wide as he tries to reach for her.

“I am fine,” she covers her face with her hands, too embarrassed to look at him. All of the energy leaves her body.

“I know your ankle is injured. Are you sure you are alright?” Jasper moves the blanket he has covering him, to the side so that he can swing a leg over the edge of the cot.

“What are you doing,” Eliana almost shrieks, shooting up and rushing to his side. She places a hand on his shoulder to urge him to lay back down.

Jasper resists, though, and stares up at her. He grips the sides of the cot as she now presses down on him with both hands, on either shoulder.

“Please, lie back down. You need to rest more,” she grunts as her effort is futile. Even wounded severely, Jasper holds more strength in one arm than Eliana does in her entire body.

“Eliana,” he says gruffly in order to grab her attention.

She halts, realizing the position they are in. In trying to get him to down, she is now between his legs, her body inches from his. Her muscles erupting into flames, her fingertips tingling. Heart fluttering, Eliana is frozen. Jasper’s gaze keeps her still. The emerald flecks in his eyes mesmerize her.

“You need to rest your ankle,” he orders. His own hand moves to his knee, but in doing so, it softly brushes Eliana’s leg.

She gasps, every nerve in her body lighting up. Sparks dance in her vision, blinding her momentarily.

“It. . .” it takes a while before Eliana is able to regain her thought process again. She swallows, hoping that it will somehow calm her once more. Her hands burn. “It has been almost two days. I have been mostly resting it, allowing it to heal.”

A furrow builds in his brow and Jasper cocks his head to the side. He leans his chest in ever so slightly.

“Has it really been that long?”

Eliana slowly nods her head. She wants to look away, but Jasper’s gaze holds so much power over her.

“Where are my parents?”

“They have gone to find us some food,” she murmurs slowly and reluctantly lowers her arms.

Jasper glances away, toward the flap of the tent. “Has the Chief mentioned whether he will allow us to stay?”

“Mama says that he has yet to make a decision. She says that there is history between Conrad and him, but he is being kind enough to allow you to heal here.”

Jasper scoffs, pressing his eyes closed momentarily, “Of course he is being kind. His people would not accept him throwing us out. We are fellow Xefol that have done no wrong to the clan.”

Eliana opens her mouth to ask about the history Conrad has with the Chief, but she decides to remain quiet.

“Please, lie back down. I do not want you reopening your wound,” she urges, but this time she does not touch him.

He nods in agreement, shifting his legs.

Eliana steps back, to give him room, but she puts too much pressure on her ankle and it gives out on her.

As she sways, Jasper reaches up grabbing onto her waist in order to hold her up. Eliana is unable to stop the gasp as it bursts though her throat. She places her own hands on Jasper’s and looks him in the eyes, her vision quivering. Her breath comes out in shallow puffs as she tries to catch her bearings and overcome the agony pulsing in her leg.

“Eliana,” Jasper’s gaze is hooded and he clenches his jaw. He tightens his grip on her waist, but as she whimpers from the fire in her abdomen, she forces herself to move away.

He pauses a moment, watching her.

Eliana looks everywhere except Jasper. After what feels like eternity, Jasper murmurs under his breath and lays back down on the cot. He stares up, silent.

“What do I do? Do I ask him?” Eliana’s thoughts are constantly overrunning her mind. She cannot stop thinking about what he said two days ago. She has not had the chance to ask him until now, but she is unsure if he will even remember.

“Uh, Jasper,” she almost whispers.

He only hums softly to let her know he is listening. His hands are clasped on his torso.

“Two days ago, when you first woke up, you said something. You did not finish your sentence though.” She plays with the hem of her shirt, embarrassment blinding her. “I guess, what I would like to ask, is if you remember, and if so, what exactly you meant by it.”

By the crease in his brow, Eliana knows he is confused.

“You said that you only want me, but you never finished your sentence, so I was confused.”

Jasper tightens his clasped hands, “Oh, that? I am sorry if I have caused you any uncertainty. I only meant that I wanted you here. Since my parents were gone, I wanted someone I knew. A friendly face.”

Hiding the pain ripping her heart in two is more difficult than Eliana thought. She swallows, “Oh, alright. That makes sense.” She forces a smile on her lips.

“This cannot be love,” she states to herself. “It is too painful.”