Chapter 313

Erik sat down on the bed in the dark hotel room. His life was spinning out of control again and he was starting to hate himself. He hated how he felt toward Pearl but he couldn't help it. He wanted to punish her. He wanted her to be better. And the sad thing was, he also knew she didn't deserve it. He just couldn't stop. And more so, he didn't want to. He would tire of it eventually. He always did. It came in waves. He would be good again. He knew he was good at proving he could be a good guy. He wasn't entirely bad, after all.

He called Edward. "He's not in California. I don't know where he went but we are sure he isn't here. I'm going to need more people on this." He said.

Edward wasn't happy but he agreed. "Find him." He said.

"What if we just let him be? Let him go? Would it be all that terrible?" Erik asked.

"If he didn't know what he does, I'd let him go without question. Even though it would make us out to look weak, I would accept it. But this? No. He needs to be found." Edward said

"Alright, father." Erik said. "I will need the help, though. Please send them soon."

He hung up and looked at his phone. He called Pearl.

"Hey. How are things going?" Pearl asked, sleepily.

"I just got to San Fransisco. I will keep you updated. Have you heard anything from Maggie?" He asked.

"No. I'm kind of worried. It isn't like her to not answer my calls or texts." Pearl said.

"Right. Yes. That's why we are so insistent on finding them." Erik said.

"Don't give up. Please talk to her when you find her. I'm worried about her." Pearl said.

"I know, my love. I'm doing everything I can. Hopefully I will be home soon with you and the baby. I miss you." He said.

They hung up and he took a deep breath. You can go back, Erik thought. You can do it again.

But he knew it was only a facade. He was never a good man. He tried to warn her. But now, now he had her. She was his. Legally and now tied to him with a child. He could be himself again. And soon, he would have an entire country behind him. He was going to be king.

***************

"Pearl... " Sebastian said, sitting up in bed after reaching over and finding her not beside him in his bed.

He looked across the room and saw her, sitting on the window seat, her legs tucked up under her arms, moonlight shining on her.

He walked over to her. "You look like an angel, sitting there." He said. "Even the moon craves your light."

She looked up at him and said, "I had this feeling tonight that everything was going to be ok. I felt it. Bash, I think I finally have it right." She said, taking his hand and pressing it against her cheek.

"That makes me so happy to hear." He said.

"Why? Why didn't I go with my gut and stay with you? I had the chance. And you're right, I would have been better off if he would have stayed gone. Bash, I wanted to be with you. That's the truth. I wanted to end things with Erik and be with you. Everything in me told me to do it but I couldn't see past the love I thought I had for him. The loyalty I had for him. You were so gallant and kind. Honest. I felt it. My instinct was right but my heart completely changed it, betrayed it." She said. "Gail has helped and I'm working on it. Everyday I am working through these things in my head. I understand it now. I didn't before. You cared enough about me to help me begin therapy. You weren't taking no for an answer. Do you understand how caring that was? How important?" She asked. He shook his head.

"No, Pearl. All I did was open a door, you were the one that chose to be brave enough to walk through it" he said.

"Sebastian, I have something to tell you. Something very important." She said.

Sebastian looked at her and nodded. "Alright." He said.

"I am a liar." She began. "I have lied so many times in my life."

"I'm not following, Pearl. What do you mean?" He asked.

"I said a word, an extremely important word, to people when I didn't understand the meaning of it. I used it out of context. I used it to make others feel good. I used it as a way to say that I was a good person. It destroyed lives. It hurt people. And now, now I understand what it means and I'm afraid to say it. To feel it. It's foreign to me because I didn't understand the meaning before." She explained.

Sebastian took her hand in his. "Pearl, you don't have to say it. You see, unlike the others, I don't have to hear it to feel it from you. I don't need to hear that word to feel comfort from you and secure with you. I don't need to hear it to know you are loyal and good. I don't require it as a weapon to hold over your head. I already know it. I can feel it." He said. "You never have to say it if you don't feel you want to. Or can. I know you love me. And not just as my friend. Pearl, you're in love with me. You have been since the moment our eyes first met in Edward's office. I felt it, too." She looked at him, crying. He said it for her. He took a lot of the weight off of her, in all things. He did it effortlessly and selflessly. He did it like the others only said they would and yet never could or truly wanted to. He did it without saying anything at all. He too, didn't have to say it for her to feel it. She didn't have to be so strong anymore. So tired. He was helping to carry the weight instead of adding to it.

"Yes." She said. "I do."

"You don't have to be anything for me. You are enough." He said. "Right here, having the honor of watching you in the moonlight, your skin like rose petals and your hair like silk... how could any man ever need more?" He asked as he kissed the top of her head. He was younger than she was but he seemed centuries older. She absolutely adored him.