Chapter 11: Normal

"Aiyah... Aiyah, wake up." A soft voice called for me as I regained my senses back.

Where.. Where am I?

I had flashes of memories even before I opened my eyes and it was all so fast, making me wince in pain.

Damn... My head is pounding.

I opened my eyes and saw Mama in front of me. She had her legs crossed on top of the other while she had her arms around her chest, looking so strict at me.

Which, only made my morning worsen.

I took a glance around my room and saw my beloved brother, Carlo standing there with his hands against the wall. He looked like he wanted to come and check on me but he couldn't take a step because of his mom.

Mama must have noticed us staring at each other, as if almost reading each other's minds so she looked at Carlo which only made him hang his head low to avoid the gaze.

She then looked at me with the same look she gave Carlo.

Oh, please.

I just woke up, I'm not in the mood for this shit.

"Happy now? Look what happened to you. How many times do you have to open your eyes in this bed-"

"I live here, right? I'm supposed to wake up in this bed." I cut her off. I really don't mean to sound so arrogant whenever I'm talking to her but she just seems to keep on pressing my buttons. I felt like somebody was looking at me and turned my head towards the door only to see Carlo giving me a warning glare.

My head pounced as a sharp memory dashed onto my mind. I held my head and just then I noticed the IV connected on my hand. I relaxed a bit while staring at it before I sighed and took it off of my hand.

I heard how Carlo made a sound as if I pulled the IV from him. I suddenly looked at Mama that looked surprised, but overall, I noticed how she looked at me like she couldn't believe what I just did.

"What? They're going to remove it later anyways."

She glared at me before she spoke, "You really are a disappointment. No wonder why your father left you."

"Ma!" Carlo shouted in my defense but Mama didn't bother look. She just stood up and walked out of my room

Carlo looked stupid trying to decide if he's going to go run after his mom or stay here with me. To be honest, I really don't want anyone in my room so I just stared at Carlo blankly. He then sighed and ran after his mom.

My memories about what happened last night flashed on my mind again, making me wince in pain.

I felt something wet on my hand so I looked at it. Right. Blood is going down my fingers but I am just looking at it.

Blood. My memories about that thing came without anything to stop it. Some were horror movies, crime scenes I saw on TV, but the last one was the worst.

It was a dog on the ground, silently calling for help. He was surrounded by his own blood, most of it coming from his head.

I dramatically moved my head to shake off the thought.

The thing about hyperthymesia is that when you see a thing, basically anything, you'll remember anything about that thing. Then you'll remember what you were doing before seeing the thing. Until you move your eyes to look for another object, you are stuck in the never ending ferris wheel of memories.

You will always go to where and when things started and you have no other choice but to do so. You will always go back to what made you the man you are today and for me, it's a bit tiring.

Scratch that: it's a lot tiring.

For others, they thought that having this is a gift. It is in some way, actually. You can remember formulas, words.. anything. You name it. You can be a top in you class when you wanted to.

But you also have embarrassing memories, sad ones, and all the tragic things that happened to you.

You have nowhere to run.

And maybe that was the reason why other hyperthymesian patients, maybe 61 persons around the world as of now, consider me lucky. Having to drink a special drug that can make you forget, even though it's just for a few days.

With that thing going on my mind, I remembered that lunatic. That freakin' dumb bastard that's the reason why I am in this bed right now. That motherfucker that thinks he's so handsome that I actually fell for him.

I mean, yeah, maybe I was playing around that time.

After I stopped my self from digging in further into my memories, I heard a knock on my door.

"Hey." He said. He put down my medicines and the salad that is my meal for lunch. I just nodded at him and grabbed the bowl.

"What happened to your hand?"

"Dextrose." I said.

"You took it out?"

I nodded. "Does it hurt?"

"Numb." I was supposed to say 'dumb' but I stopped my self from saying it. Of course it hurts!

"Who's that?" He asked and pointed at one of my sketches. He's taking about the biggest canvas in my room. It's still not finished, it doesn't have any color yet and I'm still working on the features on the face so no one can really tell who that it besides me.

"Dustine, can you stop being nosy and leave me and my sister alone?" Carlo said all of a sudden. I didn't even notice he was here already.

Dustine was also a bit shocked, but he quickly recovered and nodded. He looked at my tray of food that was now in my lap before he went ahead and left.

"I don't like that guy." I said honestly. I seriously don't know what's wrong with that man. He's weird.

Carlo looked at me before he shook his head. His eyes then looked at my hand again, that just stopped bleeding, before letting out a sigh. He walked towards my medicine cabinet and grabbed all the things he needs to treat my wound. He then walked towards me and sat on the side of my bed. He held my arm and cleaned it before he put a band aid on top of it.

He looked into my eyes and I was scared a bit because he looked so serious. "Aw!" I held my arm because he pinched me! I looked at him all mad like but my eyes quickly returned to my puppy eyes when he widened his eyes at e as a warning.

"What were you thinking?"

I fell quiet. I've seen Carlo like this before. Eyes all angry but you can still see disappointment deep inside. I know he's disappointed in me because he already told me that. He doesn't want me to talk to his Mom like that. Ever since we were little, Carlo's always been lecturing me that I should treat Mama as my own but things are just too difficult. She makes it difficult for me to love her. She never really sees me as part of the fam so when I finally noticed that, I accepted it and went on with my life.

I was so young, nine years old and I'm already making my own meal because she told the cook not to give me food just because I had a B+ on my exam paper. I could've aced that test without any doubt but some of my classmates where talking shit at me, saying that it was unfair that I go to school with a condition like that. So I just let myself answer some of the questions with the wrong answers.

I came back to reality when Carlo snapped his fingers in front of me. He still had that same look, now just a bit annoyed because he's probably thinking that I wasn't paying attention. I don't like Carlo like this, he's getting stuck between Mama and me.

Carlo is the most important person I have, and I don't want to see him like this. So instead of making him guilty and stressed, I'll just ask him something instead.

"Carlo. Can you take me to Marinduque?"

"No." He said. "Is that your best attempt to console me? By asking for a favor that will only stress me out more?" My mood suddenly changed and now I felt a smile crawl up my face.

"Is it working?"

"No." He said straight faced.

"Come on, I miss Nanang already!"

He looked at me but he quickly averted his gaze. I smiled devilishly. Just a little bit more, Aiyah. He can't say no for that long.

Well. That was what I thought. Carlo spent the night here with me but he really said no every time I asked. I just slept the whole afternoon and just woke up when it was 6:00 pm and it was time for dinner. Carlo slept on the sofa the whole afternoon, too. He must've been tired from their band practice.

He opened the door for Dustine while I rubbed my eyes while welcoming memories that woke up with me. Dustine brought steak, while Carlo just ordered pizza. He even got pissed when I tried to take a slice while he wasn't looking. After dinner, Carlo was so awake that he watched re-runs of Marvel movies while I quietly drifted to sleep due to my sleeping pills.

It's been a long time since I slept that long. The only problem is, it must have been too long because now my back aches from lying on my bed all day. I asked the nurse that was on duty to check my vitals for a pain reliever which she gave after the check up. Good thing that after a few hours, I felt better.

It was a very boring day. Breeze wasn't here with me because Carlo brought him home on his condo the day I passed out so I don't have anyone here to annoy. Because of boredom, I just decided to finish my portrait. I stood in front of my easel stand and drew on my canvas. I decided to finish the features now and just paint it when I felt like doing it. After getting tired in that, I grabbed my laptop and just watched a movie.

Dustine came by to bring snacks but he left without saying a word. I took my medicines and continued on watching. I was on my third movie when I felt sleepy. It was weird, because I wasn't feeling tired or anything.

My senses came back when I felt someone touching my hair and gently held my arm. I didn't move because I knew it was just a dream. I have lots of those since the day we moved here.

I just slept peacefully until noon when I woke up with Joshua's figure on my door.

♡