19 | Level Up

19 | Level Up

Paige's Point of View ~

"Five, four, three, two, one, Leggo! (watch me),

Level up, level up, level up, level up, level up.

Level up, level up, level up, level up, level up!" Bella sang along to the lyrics loudly.

"Shhhh! I'm trying to think!" They had given me some ideas for excuses so that I wouldn't have to go to dinner, but in the end, none of them would really seem to work.

I tapped her speaker. Bloooop. It turned off and she frowned and tapped it back on.

Once she had turned the volume up all the way she pulled Sarah up off her queen size bed.

After the incident at the grocery store I immediately dropped the food my mom had asked for at my house, and left to go to Sarah's house next door and talk to Bella and Sarah about everything that had happened in the past week. They sat down with me and patiently listened to me rant on and on about my problems. After I was done they decided to take a break and jam out to loud music.

"All this on me, so yummy, all this oh so yummy. You know you want this yummy, yummy all in your tummy."

"Level up, level up, level up, level up, level up. Level up, level up, level up, level up, level up. All this on me, so yummy, all this oh so yummy. You know you want this yummy, yummy all in your tummy" Sarah joined in and they started dancing freely around her room.

"Could one of you guys please come to dinner?!" I yelled over the music that boomed through the entire room.

"No!" Bella yelled over the music too.

"You're on your own with this one! You need to Level up, level up, level up, level up, level up, and do things on your own! You need to branch out and face your fears without help from us!"

"Yeah!" Sarah agreed and spun around in circles.

"It's not that easy." I frowned and moved my legs into a criss cross position.

"Oh come on!" Bella screamed and grabbed me by the arms. "Get up and dance!" Although I resisted as much as I could, she pulled me up and I gave in. We bounced, sang and danced along to the loud pop music.

Team love, don't want no hate!

I'm grindin', I'm shinin'

Up, up, up on my way!

Thank God I never settled!

This view is so much better!

I'm chilling, I'm winning

Like on another level...

***

"They'll be here in ten minutes, be ready everybody!" Mom was still downstairs working on her chicken that takes hours to prepare.

I've been upstairs in my room all day, still thinking of what I was going to do. I thought about sneaking out before they got here, but I didn't want to disappoint my mom, Lily, or Maddie. I also thought about hiding in the attic, but nobody's been up there for years, so there's probably deadly spiders and cobwebs, and as you know, I hate spiders with all my heart.

Ding!

The perfect idea popped into my head. I'll just dress casually instead of fancy like my mom had ordered everyone to. Like sweatpants and hoodies casually. Yeah. I could protest in a way that would really hurt anything but everybody's eyes.

Sarah would be ashamed of me for dressing down, but this will just have to do.

I pulled on a random blue sweatshirt I found in my messy closet, and the grey sweatpants I got myself for Christmas last year from my dresser.

I let my hair fall down from the pony tail I had it in and only brushed it out because my mom would definitely scold me about that part.

"Get down here, Paige!"

Overlapped laughter came from the kitchen as I made my way downstairs.

Deep breath in, dream breath out.

Stay calm.

Do not explode in front of Lily and Maddie.

"Your Paige is such a sweet girl. Did she tell you she helped me out with Maddie when I couldn't find anyone?"

"Paige!" Maddie jumped up from her chair at the island and leaped onto me and I grabbed her and put her on my waist. I ignored my mom who looked at my clothes with a disgusted face.

"How are you doing, Maddie?" I smiled and she shifted onto the right side of my hip.

"I'm great. I brought Sunny." She held up the doll that now has smudged lipstick on her plastic lips.

"That's nice, do you wanna see my room?" I asked her, half guilty. Okay, maybe I'm using Maddie as an excuse to get more time out of this situation, but it's not like she doesn't want to play.

"Yes!" She jumped out of my arms and giggled.

"Okay," I took her hand in mine and directed her towards the staircase. "I'll show you the way."

I felt a pair eyes on me but ignored the feeling and left with Maddie.

"Your room is amazing. You have so many books!" She exclaimed as she flipped through the books on the bookcase.

I thought about letting her read some of them but she may be a little young for all the complex romantic novels I own.

I kneeled down to where she was sitting on the soft rugas she picked up one of my books I saved from when I was around her age. "Maybe when you're older I'll give them to you, so you can read them all."

Her smile widened and she jumped onto the bed. I smiled too as she threw a couple of the crackers on the plate I had on my bed, into her mouth.

I wish I was a kid again. Everything was so much easier. No stress or anxiety or popularity. It's just fun and play when you're younger.

"I like your sweats, I wish I had a pair."

I gasped lightly, remembering that I had the same exact pair but a smaller size when I was younger. I got up and went through all the clothes in my closet. There was barely anything on the rack because I've always been too lazy to put my shirts back so I just leave them on the floor. So I bent down and throw around the clothes.

"Oh my god." I picked up the pants that were just the perfect size. Maddie gasped loudly at the sight of them.

"They're beautiful!" She screamed and giggled as I threw them in her direction.

She immediately pulled them over her bare legs and under her blue skirt she wore. Then pulled the skirt over her head.

We both stood in front of the long mirror I had stolen from my parents room. I have no idea how they didn't notice. I guess it's because they aren't home that much. I crossed my arms.

"You look great."

My smile disappeared at the sound of his voice from behind me.

"Thanks, L!" Said Maddie. I turned around and saw Maddie spinning around in circles then my eyes landed on Leo.

He wore a loose white linen button up shirt and jeans. The shirt wasn't buttoned up all the way and his hair was scruffy as always which made him look more casual. I'm guessing his mom dressed him.

I looked away when he noticed I had been staring at him.

"I'm hungry."

All eyes turned to Maddie. She spun around in her new sweatpants, grinning dreamily with Sunny in her hand while making her way to the door.

She left. She left me stranded with the guy that broke my heart so that we could talk. That evil little child.

"I-"

"Stop." The smiley personally I had put on completely disappeared.

"Pay-"

"Shut up."

His glance was blank. There was nothing in his eyes. I didn't even see a flicker of color whatsoever. He hurt me, not the other way around.

"You did this." I pointed my finger to myself, forcing myself not to cry. "You hurt me."

"I didn't want-"

"I said shut the hell up."

He paused for a moment then raked his hand through his messy hair.

"You don't get to talk." I paced up to him and he stepped back cautiously. He hit the wall and we were inches away. "Knowing me, talking to me, is a privilege. You've l-lost that privilege." I trembled uncontrollably.

"Your right." He shrugged. I stepped back, stunned at his words. "You're just perfect. So perfect I can't and shouldn't have you in my life."

I didn't say anything.

"You're just so amazing I shouldn't even be able to look at you." I couldn't tell if he actually meant what he was saying or if he was being sarcastic and making fun of me. Probably the second one. He continued, "You hate me, but don't know me. How cute."

He's the one that's supposed to be perfect. The popularity, the good looks, it's all anybody wants in life. In reality, nobody is perfect. So I should really be asking myself: Paige, is this really worth it? Is wasting all your time on being mad at a person who made a mistake worth it? People make mistakes. I make mistakes. Everyday. Maybe I should forgive him. Maybe I should let everything go completely. But would that really be smart? Wouldn't I get hurt again?

"I'd like to know why." When I sat on the edge of my bed I sighed in defeat. A week. I've had to deal with this for a week. The moment I get home he just so happens to be invited to dinner.

"I don't know, okay? It all just happened so fast I didn't want to-"

"It all happened so fast!?" I yelled angrily. Wow. "So your saying, sleeping with a snake was that hard to resist!?"

"Let me fucking finish!" He yelled back. That's the thing about expressions. Just by the way your eyes or eyebrows are positioned, you can tell if someone is hurt. I thought I was the one that was hurt, but I see it in his eyes.

"I didn't want to hurt you. I would never want to hurt you." He trembled. I have never heard him tremble. Leo doesn't tremble. He knows what he wants and gets what he wants. Nobody dares to get in his way.

"Am I hearing yelling?"

"What's going on?!"

"Is everybody okay?!"

My mom and Lily's voices overlapped each other from downstairs. We didn't respond

Leo looked down into my eyes. I couldn't get anything out of my mouth. It was hard. Seeing anyone like this. He looked broken.

"Leo, I can't help but think. I can't help but think I'll get hurt. My brain—it's my head telling me things. I can't-"

"Kids, we've been waiting for you for half an hour, get down here at once!"

"I told you I know you're not a bad person. I know you would never do something like that on purpose to someone you care for, but I know you don't care for me because you did this to prove it."

"I didn't sleep with her." Leo said almost instantly.

"W-what?" I had managed to choke out. No. No, the snake said it herself. But she's a snake.

He ignored my ignorance. "And just because your head is saying something doesn't mean it's true." He tapped his pointer finger to his head.

"Look, I don't want to do this." I backed up and he immediately became tense. "I don't want to fight, when there's no reason to." He relaxed when he understood my words.

"GET DOWN HERE AND COME EAT WITH US." Both moms yelled up the stairs at once.

"Okay, okay, we're coming!" I yelled back. He backed up as I did. I have no idea how everything went from being ourselves around each other tho not being able to speak to or look at each other.

We both went down together, Leo close behind me, and saw both moms crossing their arms and whispering to each other.

"They must be close, it's like they don't want to be away from each other."

"I know right? What were they doing up there?"

"What if they where-"

"Okay, stop." I cut them off before things got way too interesting. Wow, they got close fast.

"Hey Paige, how's it going?" Lily sat down next to me, unfolded her napkin and spread it across her lap. I glanced at Leo in the seat in front of me who was looking down at his plate.

"Everything's A-okay." I forced a smile, keeping my eyes on the food in front of me to avoid attention.

***

"So Leo, what's the tea? Any new gossip or party's? I've been meaning to-"

"No. there's nothing going on." Leo interrupted (His way of shutting Ronnie up)

My back started to hurt from sitting in the same hard chair for hours. Both moms have been talking about Leo's basketball future and the fact that my social life is really, really bad. We all know it is, but they still have to gossip about it in front of me and Leo, while Maddie gets to have a wonderful time watching her favorite tv show in the other room.

I never really understood parents. I get they try to protect us from everything, but sometimes they keep us from living. Having a good high school experience is difficult when you have strict parents that give you a curfew and grade expectations. Thankfully my parents aren't that strict, but some are. They'll take everything from you just to get what they want like the dirty dishes washed or the trash taken out. I don't understand why they can't just do it themselves. I mean yeah it's tiring, but why make us do it so we have to deal with it so you don't have to?

Okay, now I'm just ranting.

"What are you thinking so hard about, Paige?" I snapped out of my trance and looked up to see everyone watching me stare into space. Leo still sat across from me. He sat still with his chin in his palm and his elbow supporting the weight of his head, not daring to move from his place so one of the moms wouldn't scold him for being rude and wanting to leave.

"Uh...global warming."

The two mothers raise their eyebrows in suspicion, but soon let it go to talk about the topic I just brought up. Suddenly my mom started crying over the polar bears and their melting homes. Lily gave her a clean napkin as she let out more and more stiff sniffs.

"It's like humans don't care we're killing the planet!" Lily wrapped an arm around my mom. When they started coming up with suggestions for the new neighborhood group, I decided this was the perfect time to slip out of this mess without being noticed and go take a long nap. After all, I was almost too tired to move. I needed it.

Before I could sit up from my seat Leo beat me to it and slipped out of his seat making his way to the dining room exit, mouthing a quiet 'good luck.' I mouthed 'don't you dare' in return, but he left without another word. How dare he.

"Wait a second, where'd he go?"

"LEO?"

Wow, now I really won't be able to leave now that they've realised there back at the dinner table and not some neighborhood watch meeting designed, organized, and joined by only the two of them.

"Paige, if you'd like to go read or something, go so the grownups can talk." My mom said without looking up in my direction to speak to me properly. She says it like I'm still 7 and doesn't understand a word they're saying.

Besides the fact that they kept on ignoring my presence I was gone in a flash.

I ended up in the kitchen—where no human beings bothered to be in—and sat down and leaned on my elbows so I didn't have to support the weight on my own head. I wasn't kidding when I said I was tired.

"Can I show you something?"

I turned around and shook my head at his question. "No thanks."

"Paige." He stared into my eyes with a pleading look. An irresistible look. I shouldn't give in. Since when do I give in? I do what I want. But I just want to know what he- No. No, say no.

"Fine."

Goddamnit.

He almost instantly lit up. The way he expresses his emotions and feelings is so complicated. I almost never understand his looks or expressions. He's either completely blank or he has light in his eyes. He almost never has that glowing light in his eyes, but when he does, for just a millisecond, I can see the good in him.

He grabbed my wrist and I whined at the pain from his strong grip. "Jeez, calm down, you're cutting off my circulation." He ignored me, still keeping his eyes in front of him as he dragged me outside.

"What are you doing? Where are we going? What about our parents? It's too cold outside. I don't want to get sick ag-"

"Where's your sense of adventure?" He finally turned his head and looked back at me. "Also, I think you'll be fine. You're wearing that." He pointed to the sweatshirt I had thrown on hours ago as he kept pulling me in the direction of who knows what.

I looked down at it and groaned. How could I be so blind. Again. The sweatshirt I threw on was his. I must have thrown it in the steep pile of clothes in my closet and forgotten.

I know it's super cliche when a guy offers his sweatshirt or jacket to his girlfriend or girl or whatever, but they don't lie when they say it smells exactly like them.

The large hoodie was way oversized on me compared to it on him. It must have been at least the size of an XXXL on my small torso. It dropped down to the point where it covered my butt. It was basically the length of a really short dress. Like the one Sarah stole from my sister and made me wear—which I almost got hypothermia in because of how small it was.

I dug my nose into the soft fabric, only to end up gasping dramatically and slightly hit Leo on the arm. He looked at me like I was mentally ill. (I definitely do not mean to offend anyone. I would never try to offend anyone in that sort of way. He's just looking at her like she's insane)

"This is disgusting. It smells disgusting." I gestured to the gross smelling hoodie.

It smelled like the gym and sweat. There was only a small hint of what he actually smelled like. Coconuts and clean. Yeah, he smells like clean. If that makes any sense. Fresh is a better word.

"Does Lily buy your shampoo?" I grin up at him teasingly. He didn't reply. "Your mom buys your shampoo."

"Is there anything wrong with that?" He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. I looked at our surroundings. I've been here before. I see trees and family size houses around me. A large building appeared, but I couldn't see it clearly, due to the dark night sky.

"No, it's just..." I couldn't help but let out another snort. "No."

There was silence for a couple of seconds until I decided to break it.

"Does she do your laundry too?"

"Paige, shut up."

A fake offended look spread across my face. "Wow, I'm hurt." I let my hand be free of his when we approached a back door of some kind. "Just trying to lighten the m- where are we?"

"School." He said plainly and reached for some kind of a door handle. Suddenly, the building became more clear. This is where I've been spending my week days for years. The more I learned here the more I became brain dead. Don't get me wrong I love math and literature with all my heart, but school makes you feel like the life is being sucked out of you every second you attend.

"What?! How?" I paused when the door clicked open. "You've never even attended here and we're in the middle of summer break!"

He took my hand and yanked me into the large dark building. "Paige?"

"Yes?"

"Shut the fuck up."

"This is illegal!" I started panicking. First of all, how did he just unlock the door so easily? Second of all, this is against the rules. No, not against the rules, against the law. What if we get caught and end up in jail. And I'll be completely lost because we'll seperated into different sex groups. He'll be perfectly fine, but me on the other hand? I'll either die of exhaustion from having to lift weights or run laps or whatever they do for physical activities, or die from some badass lady who carved one of those prison weapons from only a fork and her teeth. I can't do this. I need my comfy bed and bookcase, which I won't have in a jail cell.

"Will you stop talking and follow me?"

"Do you do this all the time? Is this an important part of your daily routine? Oh my god..." I slapped his shoulder. "You're a criminal!"

He turned around and finally met my eyes. He looked at me like I was irritating. Really irritating. Although I was freaking out, he seemed calm. To calm. "I know what I'm doing. That is why you should stop acting like a child and stop talking."

"I'm acting like a child? You're the one breaking and ent-" I stopped talking.

Footsteps.