Chapter 7: Bloodlust

Within each reincarnation, the life I was meant to live next would call out to me. I would feel the warmth of its light overwhelm me as it sucked me in closer, welcoming me. I was sent into a spiraling series of lives of war with Rome. In each life, I was born to a Germanic tribe of goths. Barbarians against all Rome. Always ending the same way, bearing witness to countless human souls around me; sent off into death right back into this chaotic illusion of life, no matter where they were sent, what life they were given. I began to think, it must all end the same, in blood and death. Truly the meaning of life cannot be this. This never-ending cycle of bloodshed ran rampant throughout all the universe, the greatest addiction to all of life must truly be death. I began to lose hope, with every life I was reborn in, my mind becoming clouded beyond reason. The only thing I cared about was the fall of Rome. In every life, all I could think about was killing Roman soldiers. The day we finally sacked Rome, I had finally lost my mind. We breached their city gates and slaughtered them. I was blinded by fury; years of war and bloodshed finally having overcome the war inside my mind. We looted the treasures of Rome, killed many Romans, and enslaved many more. I had done to them what I hated them most for. I had lost my mind.

During the sack of the city, I ran through the streets, as the homes burned around me. I was yelling and cheering like a drunken madman but consumed in a bloodlust of rage. I was covered head to toe in blood, none of which was my own. I danced through the streets like a wild animal, cutting down every roman soldier that stood in my way. The screams of terror echoed around me as I drove my axes deep into the flesh of those that challenged me. People ran from their homes screaming in fear, the want for death overcame me. I wanted to kill them all, my thoughts were hazy, I did not like what I was becoming, a monster among men.

I continued my slaughter through the roads of Rome to one of the temples nearby, where high Roman officials were being protected inside, powerful senators responsible for thousands of innocent lives lost, dead Germanic tribe members covered the floor of the temple. I began to laugh hysterically as I sprinted to them, leaping over the bodies that littered the floor, dragging both of my axes behind me on the floor. This was it; I would slaughter them all for their transgressions. The roman guards ran to me to defend their lawmakers, their self-made gods. The first two roman guards came at me, they attacked me together. I stopped mid-run and stepped back quickly, dodging them both by inches. I lifted both my axes from the ground at the same time, swinging them at the guards, severing the arms that bore their weapons from them, as their limbs fell to the ground, I went in for the kill. A quick slash from my right ax slit the first guard's throat as he fell to his knees trying to hold the blood back that poured from his neck. I slashed my left ax immediately after across the other one's chest, he stumbled back holding his gaping wound, I tossed my ax at him, upon striking him in the forehead, he fell to his knees. I kicked the roman free from my weapon, shaking the blood from my axes as I approached the senators. Three more soldiers ran to me the first one yelling and charging directly to me. The roman swung the sword at my chest, I spun around dodging it, swinging my ax into the back of his neck, he fell to the ground as his head dangled halfway still attached to his body. The other two slowly approached me. These ones were different, I could see it in their eyes.

The other two walked closer and closer to me, they had no fear in them. They both stood much taller than me, one armed with a sword and shield the other with a great Warhammer, dropping it up and down in his hand like a bat.

I found it odd, a roman soldier wielding such a weapon, I found it even odder the senators showed no fear after watching me butcher their men. The last two soldiers to defend them, and yet, they looked as if they had complete faith in them. This angered me, I blindly charged at the first one swinging my axes relentlessly, so hard the soldier fell back trying to block with his shield, the rage-filled me. I caught the second one's attack coming at me in the corner of my eye, the other soldier spun around swinging his hammer right to me. I stepped back quickly to dodge it. The other soldier rose off the ground now, the brute with the hammer continued to swing at me, but I knew, had I made one mistake, he would have the upper hand. I could not let the hammer hit me. He swung at me again, I countered it with my axes, right down the center of the handle, sliding the tips of the blades right to his fingers that held the weapon. As soon as I got to his fingers, his entire form changed into a large reptilian, it screeched loudly yelling in my face, it took me by surprise. I pulled away from the creature. The second soldier who had just gotten up shifted as well. They both, now in their large reptilian forms, pulled themselves together, they walked to me again. They must have been in control of all of Rome all along. The reptilians now attacked me together. I struggled to dodge all their attacks desperately trying to find a weak point in their form, these two reminded me much of the assassins that killed my crew on Venus. They had perfect form together. Finally, after dodging many attacks, the one with the Warhammer became much slower. I had an easier time fighting off the sword and shield reptilian. The reptilian swung at me for the final time, I spun around to dodge, I pulled both axes together and struck them upward, slicing one of its arms off, it fell back trying to stop the blood pouring out. The other one just had lifted the hammer up for another strike, it came to me, immediately striking again. I blocked with both my axes, the force nearly pushing me on my knees.

Overwhelming strength filled me, and I pushed the hammer back and away from me, sending it right back at the reptilian with so much power it split its head with the weapon. The reptilian began to stumble back, dazed. I turned to the reptilian whose limb I had just severed and finished him off first. I ran right to him and jumped into the air, raising both my axes, it shielded its face with its sword, I chopped right through it. Both of my axes went straight into his head, parting it partly in two. I used my foot to pull them free pushing the dead reptilian. I ran straight for the second reptilian, just now overcoming its daze from the impact of its weapon. Just as I raised my weapon to strike down the despicable reptilian for the last time, an arrow went through me, I stopped as I noticed it sticking out through my chest. I turned around and noticed four other reptilians coming in. Arrows rained through me until I was dead. In death, I could hear a few words exchanged between the reptilians and the Romans as my spirit still lingered, barely holding on. They spoke of the great plan and demanded the Romans regain control or they would kill every human in all of Rome. The Romans cowered in fear as they bowed to their masters.

I made it my mission to end Rome thereafter. Rome still had a counterpart in the east; the byzantine empire. They continued under reptilian rule. I fought lifetimes trying to destroy the walls of Constantinople, I was born into many races and only went to war in all of them. The great walls of Constantinople protected all that was left of Rome, as its new capital. I was reborn into countless generations of Turkish culture. I Was a Royal guard at the time of Sultan Mehmed the second's rule. The reptilians had recognized the great strength of the Ottoman empire. They left the Romans and made a deal with the sultan Mehmed, in exchange for the city of Constantinople, the sultan had to pledge his undying loyalty and support to the reptilians. The sultan laughed a bit at first upon hearing their offer, this angered the reptilians and they changed from their human form to reveal their true selves to us all. The sultan immediately gave into their offer, out of fear. The sultan had always dreamed of sacking the city of Constantinople since he was a boy, now he would have help from what he perceived as gods. Unbeknownst to him, they had protected the Romans for over a thousand years. I immediately abandoned my post as a royal guard; I was able to draw six hundred with me to Constantinople. I would never have enough time to truly know, but I genuinely believe these six hundred were other Starseed's' drawn to me in every life, helping me along the way. We had all come a long way since our first days in Mesopotamia. We would be drawn to each other in many lives.

After Atlantis, I had always worn the symbol I shared with Tiamat, drawn on a cloak I made in every life, hoping one day Tiamat would find me again. I had at least hoped if she ever met another Starseed, they might tell her a story of the great warrior bearing the insignia of light. We quickly went to byzantine and decided we would save the Romans, I no longer hated them, I knew all they had done was due only to the manipulation of the reptilians.

We were allowed to enter the walls of Constantinople; we warned their king of the attacks to come. We begged them to head back to Rome and abandon the city... They would not hear of it. They believed their walls would protect them forever, the reptilians must have shown them how to construct this great wall of defense. The Romans of byzantine would not believe that the reptilians had abandoned them. I did not waste any more time trying to convince these fools, they had been deceived. I spent over fifty days in that city, as it was laid to waste in one of the most heartbreaking events of my many lives. The conquest of Istanbul would be known throughout history. Four thousand people died that day, thirty thousand or more were enslaved.

The reptilians had brought the Ottomans giant cannons, a technology to destroy the cities walls. The reptilians were also bloodthirsty and loved war. The Romans fought on the walls when the attacks started, keeping many of the ottomans who tried to climb up them out of the cities. The cannons rained on us, for weeks, we ran into the parts of the city being smashed with stone debris, rescuing all that we could. I lost many companions in Constantinople, each sacrificing their lives for other humans of earth. I almost lost my own life once as a building began to fall from beneath me. I jumped out the window in time onto the roof and down into a cart. I kept running as cannons screamed down onto buildings around me, the roar of stone collapsing rang through my ears. Each day we moved all those we could around the city to safer parts. The city was surrounded by ottoman ships even in the seas. There was no longer any way to get the people out. In the end, the walls fell, and it was a complete massacre.

We saved many lives throughout those fifty days, but with nowhere to run any longer, most would surely die. We were forced to fight to protect all those still alive. As thousands of enemies poured in, the Romans were obliterated, the ottoman empire poured in through the rubble of the walls that once stood so gloriously. The Romans who fought them were mowed down. The Romans who ran in fear were shot down by arrows, it was absolute carnage, hundreds died before I fought my first Turkish soldier. Rage started to grow inside me again as I slew one after another, I lost complete track of time, my ears rang with static. A ring of dead bodies littered around me, the blood of the men I killed covered me and dripped from my weapons. Many more were still coming at me, I moved incredibly fast, slicing them down one by one. I had been stabbed and cut so many times, three swords were bulging from me. I dropped to my knees in my last moments, still fighting. The city set ablaze around me, innocent people running through the streets, screaming in agony, soldiers from both countries all being killed before me, children crying in the streets as they held the hands of their deceased loved ones.

It was horrifying, war was brutal.

If you believed in hell, this was it.

Everything started to go dark, I felt my spirit slipping away as I finally died, Rome fell, at last, ending a fifteen-hundred-year rule. Only now the reptilians controlled a whole new powerhouse of humans. What had I accomplished? I asked myself.

In the afterlife I was overcome with emotional pain, I no longer wanted to go on, I was torn by the pain of those I could not save. The lives lost due to another species meddling, drunken with a desire to control the world. What did they want, what was their purpose here? How could anything be so evil? How could you belittle life so much, you would be willing to take it at any second? These reptilian creatures were relentless, how could I stop them?

A warmth overtook me, and I heard her voice

It was Nevaeh

It was as if she just completely held me again, like a child, her warmth giving me comfort, my mind felt at peace.

"We are with you, always"

She whispered.

Aldrin's voice followed in a whisper

"until the end of time"

Her warmth left me, and I could not feel Aldrin's presence any longer either. I opened my eyes, and I was in the field again. Surrounded by the monoliths with the insignia I now wore on me in every life. Each stone symbol only slightly different than the next, the dots in the center of the triangles each in a different location on every insignia, each likely creating a map of the universe, they began to glow, and the light beings appeared from them. These beings were such a mystery to me, they were known as the great mystics when I lived a life on the Pleiades. Not much was known about them to the people there either, only that they were beings that could transcend space, interdimensional beings that had immense power. The Pleiadean's worshipped these beings. The light of life was all they were referred to as.

They appeared before me and began to speak

"You have don-"

"ENOUGH" I Shouted, I wanted answers.

They stayed quiet, waiting to hear what I had to say.

"I've grown tired of this constant world of death you have me entrapped in; I can't take much more."

my voice began to croak as I said this. The pain of all the lives I have lived before came flooding into me.

I continued

"For too long now, I have been fighting nothing but war, I am tired of the killing, the death, the malice of humanity who are blindly controlled by ruthless intergalactic overlords!

Where have you all been through all of this? Safely tucked away here, in whatever this is, some dimension I imagine, shielding you from the evil draconians in the universe! I do not even understand who, or what you all even are? How am I to continue like this?"

The light beings still silent, finally, began to speak

"We are called many things in every part of the universe. We are you; we are everything and everyone around you, we are the collective consciousness of this entire universe, trying to ensure the best possible reality for all of existence. We are all the same mind and yet we are also individuals, each one of us works through all of you every day to make the right choices for life. Unfortunately, life and death are mortal enemies in a sense. Death has become like a virus, infected with the need to bring about destruction and chaos. Its only goal now is to return the universe to its original form of pure darkness that once ruled the vast emptiness of space. It controls the host through fear, as the soul becomes lost within the darkness of its own consciousness. The reptilians once were a great ancient race, they were hunted down and nearly brought to extinction, they were the first race in the universe death took its hold over. Now, they live in a constant survival state of fear. Many of the draconians lost their way in their quest for revenge. The reptilians are harvesting planets of all their resources and feeding on the life within each world they harvest. The fertile slaves are forced to bear the reptilian offspring consistently, like livestock on a farm; creating more of their kind at alarming rates, they are raising their young to be warriors. They are amassing a greet fleet to destroy the universe. We can no longer connect with them; death is the only consciousness that can enter this group of reptilians' minds. The young are bred into fear-filled lives, we have so little time as they are children to try and guide them to the light. Their souls are quickly consumed by the darkness of death, never being free to be reborn as anything else. We wish to free them from this prison, but the only way to combat death is with death. In the great war when they have all gathered, we will lend you our light, so that you can return everything as it was, a natural balance in the universe once again. You and the other Starseed's must bring the other worlds of life together to defeat them once and for all."

"You speak of genocide for retribution," I shouted

"It is only temporary, there are other draconian reptilians in the galaxy that are not tainted by the sickness of death. They have stayed hidden, keeping them safe from the clutches of fear. Through them, the race will live on. We will then cleanse all souls in the great war, and they will be allowed to be reborn again. Guided this time by the Starseed's throughout the universe. The reptilian race will live on."

Completely blown away by this explanation, the concept of death as an evil consciousness bent on destruction was hard for me to understand at first. I asked them.

"How are you not able to do this yourselves, I have seen your physical forms on Pleiades, surely you must be able to defeat them."

They responded,

"We have become too weak, in the absence of death, we have taken on all of the traffic of souls. We have given our energy to continue creating them. Our physical forms are merely projections we have created within the mind. Our strength can only be used by the souls who lend us their light.

We are always with you, in every life, giving you strength, you are never alone, the spirits of Nevaeh and Aldrin who have chosen to live as a great life force in the cosmos will give you courage and power to keep going on. We do that, which we can, we feel the pain of all the life around us. Every life lost, the pain it feels, we feel it too. This is why we have asked you Starseed's that have awakened with us for help. We know this is no easy task, lifetimes of pain are a great sacrifice only a few could bear. Even you have begun to break, so we have brought you here. Your hate for the Romans and the reptilians clouded your mind. You cannot let death win, or you will become the same as the reptilians. A lost soul, immersed into the depths of death."

I was speechless, every time they spoke, I was filled with even more questions.

We began to run out of time. I started to fade out of their dimension back into the tunnel of the afterlife, the last things they said to me was:

"You must fight on Starseed, your story will have great meaning one day. It will be filled with great pain and loss, we cannot change the acts of fate, we need you to continue to fight on, follow the reptilians through all of time on earth, do everything in your power to slow them down until the time comes. You will stand before all when the great war begins, even the god of death Nergal himself shall fear you, when that day comes, we will be with you. You will lead a great army; all lights of life shall be with you.

I was reborn so many times again on earth after this, each time, fighting in a bloody pointless war, the humans seemed to never be at peace, always fighting over land or wealth or false religions. Many of these wars, the reptilians conjured, to pit the humans against each other for their own amusement and bloodlust. I watched as power transferred to each kingdom throughout the world. The reptilians always changing sides to the humans that advanced the most. The humans eventually began to revolt overthrowing their human rulers many times. Giving the reptilians a fight; I fought in them all. Defeating the reptilians many times. I was reborn into so many lives of battle; the meaning of living life became unknown to me. I chose to only be a warrior. Hundreds of years of lives went by for me. Until I was reborn into one of the most gruesome wars I would ever fight. The world was at war for a second time. The reptilian's hold on the planet grew weaker and weaker with each victory we had. They had joined with the Germans this time, creating a monster, one that would harvest human life for them by the millions. A man known as Adolf Hitler led their armies, trying to conquer the world in their name. A man consumed by more than just the wickedness of death. This man resembled death in pure physical form.

I would destroy this man and everything he stood for 

Chapter 8: World War, and the one I adore

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