Summoning Jutsu: Story Reanimation

(Narrated by Morgan Freeman: God of Narration...)

Fanfiction: A diverse form of expression born from millions of diverse minds and many forms of entertainment. It contains both the good, the true, and the beautiful, and the bad, the false, and the repulsive. The ever-evolving branches of this tree of knowledge surpass whole libraries of written work and continue to grow with each passing moment.

No one really knows when the great fanfiction god came into existence. According to my knowledge, it had to be sometime around 1952*, but his powers over the mind and will over the fickle race we all know as humans were, without a doubt, unshakable.

And with this same power and majesty, he decided to intervene in the life of yet another hopeful writer. It is well known that fanfiction writers, a particular species found in the fandom genus, are generally reclusive creatures and easily distracted.

This particular one had fallen into a state of mental strife in the harsh environment of reality and hence used their most potent and self-destructive defensive measure.

Procrastination...

Before they knew it, time had flown by, and the elusive writer had remained in their self-contained bubble, cut off from the rest of the (internet) world. They only removed themselves from their home's dark (actually pretty sunlit) recesses to peer out from a distance.

And then the great fanfiction god did frown, and he called forth his mighty power to end the writer's isolation.

"Author... Awaken..."

The great deity's decree was heard, and the author rose from their slumber like an undead from the grave.

"I LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE!"

"..." the fanfiction god remained silent, observing the pitiful creature with pity.

The writer restrained a hiss at the intense summer sun pouring through the windows before regaining their humanoid form, "So tell what story needs my inspiration, great one! Just say the word, and I'm there!"

"Author..."

"And let me say something. If anybody thinks I will drop any of my stories, vengeance will be mine!"

The fanfiction god glared at the writer, "Author!"

The writer cringed at the harsh tone.

The fanfiction god revealed a series of comments and subscriptions to the story, "These are the consuming audience," he narrowed his eyes, "And they..."

The author, "Read my stuff and give me validation?"

"Close enough," the fanfiction god pointed at the writer sternly, "And you... Oh, lazy one..."

"I... fanfiction-ize the plot..." the writer turned their head away, muttering under their breath, "I had legitimate problems to deal with. I'm not lazy."

"Sure, you did. Now. End your hiatus."

The writer sighed, clicking the update button, "One fandom reunion coming right up..."

***

*In 1952, the world's first book of fanfiction about fans appeared. The Enchanted Duplicator by Walt Willis and Bob Shaw was a metafiction based on Bunyan's The Pilgrim's Progress.