A part of me died

The strength to walk still,

After noticing your eyes had lost all life,

How was it found?

Did my insides not realize my whole world went upside down?

All my heartfelt apologies didn't change a thing.

I hope you didn't think of me as selfish as I seemed.

I thought I wouldn't be able to eat for all of eternity

But I still had to perform all my duties.

Shocking as this might be;

My eyes didn't stop moving even though it felt like I had lost everything.

I saw the worst thing I could and even so,

When I got up and walked out the door; my town felt just like before.

It wasn't raining.

I didn't hear any weeping.

Just the same old taste of salt,

Just the same old life; A work of art in front of the blind

But no one knows and I never told;

A part of me died that will never be revived.

I convinced myself, you left only because my organs were soon to be at rest

And you had no one else

To take care of your fragile self.

God has proven to be merciful yet again,

He has made amends and has decided to make us share a bed;

Six feet under but better than this hell

But I knew in the end fairy tales don't exist.

I held you in my hands sobbing, wishing to trade places so that you could live to find your happy ending

But you stayed still.

Losing all that you earned just at that one moment.

I knew then a part of me had reached its end.

All our time spent together,

I never seemed to have made you any happier.

My selfish acts: leaving you to finish my tasks.

I now understand:

I was not worthy to have lived by your side.

I will forever cry.

I will continue to blame myself for the rest of the time.

All these crimes I see, left and right.

The cruelty of this world I now have identified

But I still can't forget the time my cat died

And took a part of me, leaving me incomplete inside.