zigginah

Tear-stained cheeks, my mascara was now an ugly smudge after being ruined with all the crying I had been doing for the past hour. I could not recognize myself as I looked through the mirror. The more I stared at myself the more the tears. I could hear them in the next room. Their moans enraged me and made me feel like throwing up. I retched but nothing came out. 

Disgust is what I felt.


My life had turned out to be a chaotic mess and I wondered what I had done to deserve all that. I was a good person or so I believed.

I smiled through the pain and thought to myself that everything was going to be okay. I did not believe that myself but I had to tell myself to keep going or I would be stuck in a loop with my past trying to set myself free...

DAWN.

Doesn't he even miss me or doesn't he even want to check up on me and see if everything is okay. Not that I wanted him to okay well yeah I wanted him to.


He doesn't pick my calls doesn't answer my texts .Am so tired of him . I just want to know if he is okay. In school we don't get to see each other . He changed classes . He is simply ignoring me . It's fine and it's not okay I mean did I do something wrong?  


I should probably stop being a bitch and shut my mouth okay not my mouth I should stop thinking but then I can't. You see the thing about overthinking it eats you up .


I glance at my untouched food and don't even feel like eating. He better not show his face here , fucking up with my food appetite. Am trying to hold my tears because I really don't know why I feel so gittery and feel like being a cry baby. We were not even that close right??


I know am lying to myself because it hurts like a bitch...


28.He Doesn't Care.