zigginah

Tear-stained cheeks, my mascara was now an ugly smudge after being ruined with all the crying I had been doing for the past hour. I could not recognize myself as I looked through the mirror. The more I stared at myself the more the tears. I could hear them in the next room. Their moans enraged me and made me feel like throwing up. I retched but nothing came out. 

Disgust is what I felt.


My life had turned out to be a chaotic mess and I wondered what I had done to deserve all that. I was a good person or so I believed.

I smiled through the pain and thought to myself that everything was going to be okay. I did not believe that myself but I had to tell myself to keep going or I would be stuck in a loop with my past trying to set myself free...

DAWN.

I had always tried to assume it because there was no way I could be gay. In highschool played football and I grossed me out when I looked at other people. I hated people who were gay because it was everything that was wrong with the world.

What they not tell you is that no matter how you try to hide it ,you are still the same person the end of the day. I fucked alot if females hoping that it would finally change me.It did nothing because everytime I fucked them I felt disgusted by myself. I thought I was in love once you with Calleb but we all said we could never talk about it because it was disgusting.

"Am completely drunk I can't even go to my place",said Calleb.

"It's okay you can crash at my place ",I said to him.

"Okay then let's go to my place",I had said.

LOVE AT FIRST NIGHT