Travel 10. Lost And Never Found

Sunny days are finally here!

I could feel the smell of spring time. Our garden was full of roses, daffodils andd foxgloves. My mom is very into flowers and plants, she takes care of them even better than she does with me. I'm not very into them but I'm the kind of person who can appreciate beauty in nature.

My dad would never like gardens. He used to say they are just a waste of time. He never recognized my mom's job in it.

-You've been kind of ignoring me all this week. Have I done anything to you?

I looked at my mom. We were eating some pasta.

-Of course not, why would you say that?

-Well, I'm here in front of you, but you rather look outside that look to your own mom!

-Come on, don't you see how pretty the garden is today?

She looked at the window and nodded.

After a while, she just asked if I had a fight with Harlow.

-No Mom, I'm telling you, I'm fine.

-It doesn't seem like it. You've been out in space. Is college bothering you? Because if it is that, you'll need to relax. Stress comes after you get in, not before. So chill.

-Is not that either. Is just... How can someone love his or her agressor?

She looked at me, and then looked down to the floor.

-The thing is, most of these kind of relationships start very nicely. Everything is romantic, you wish to stay with that person for so long... And eventually it just happens. He or she starts to show their real self. You get to know more of the bad things since the good ones are already set from the very beginning... It's complicated.

-Why didn't you just leave Dad from the first moment he was abusive? Mom, why?

She rolled her eyes.

-Is this about it again? I told you many times. I wanted to save my marriage. I was afraid, I'm not going to lie. At the end it was because I wanted to be a mom so bad before my 30s, and there wasn't any man available except your father. Come on, he was my husband! And he is a great father, you know that.

-But not a good man.

-Husband. Not man, husband. The problem was with me. Not with you or anyone else. See, when a woman is afraid, she tends to think that is her fault the behavior of the agressor. It's very difficult to get out of there but if you are strong enough for yourself, and with the help of others, is not impossible. You got to understand that there is always a reason for someone else's behavior.

-Lately, I got interested in this kind of topic. So I've been reading and thinking about how you were part of it.

My mom grabbed my hand.

-It's all okay now, isn't it? I've got Mark by my side, he is very nice to me and your Dad is always there for you, just as how it must be.

I nodded and continued eating my lunch, but my mom wouldn't stop looking at me.

-Are you sure you're alright? Was that the only thing that has been through your mind?

-Yes Mom, I really am fine.

Next week, I was going to start studying a lot as if I was in senior year, again. Exams are coming and I must get into a good college. The truth is, I haven't set my eyes on anything yet. Oliver was willing to get into Cambridge, and Derek was going for Oxford, but those are just too much for me. And I'm not saying I can't do it, but I just need some free time more than other people. I got a life too, I don't want to extinct from my hobbies and my friends.

Delia really wasn't planning to go to college. I mean yes, she is interested and all of that, but she prefers to work first and study, which my mom says is just a way of escaping from college to end up marrying a rich man (in this case, Oliver is the "rich man" because he'd graduate from Cambridge without any scholarship).

I think that anyone built their faith as how they please. My mother taught me that getting a degree or even a PhD would always get me even further than where I want to be. And I really like that idea, though is not always the case. How many successful people are out there, without even finishing high school?

The longer I wait to choose a career and a college, the older I become.

Suddenly, I got a phone call from Harlow.

-Hey Harls.

-No time for flirting, you need to come to Rebecca's house right now!

-What's the matter? - I asked, curious about it.

-Come, and see it for yourself.

I was surprised by that. What could have happened?

I went downstairs to tell my mom I was going to the twins' house, and she told me she was going to meet with Anne.

-A meeting between moms-in-law?- I asked, laughing.

-Well, yes. Anne told me that Georgia and Michael are getting married.

-What? Georgia hasn't told me anything!

-But she doesn't know! Michael hasn't proposed yet.

I rolled my eyes.

-I thought he already did. Now, that I knew. If he keeps postponing then it's not going to happen.

-That's why Anne wanted to see me, to talk to Michael and give him some ideas. You know, boys always need a mature and female opinion on these stuff.

-I bet, he is such a loser sometimes. Anyways, see you at dinner time, Mom?

-Let's meet up at Savoy's. It's been a while since we last ate there.

I agreed and kissed her on the cheeks.

Walking on the streets, even though the Poulter's house was near from mine, I was listening to some songs.

The one replaying now is "Out Of My League" by Fitz and The Tantrums.

I laughed to myself. I would always keep on playing that song when I was about... What? 12 years old? I was so deep when it came to emotions and love. And that song was hitting hard back at the time around this royal country.

From far, I would see Harlow. He was standing still, talking lively with Rebecca. His white shirt was a little wet. Maybe he dropped his bottle of water again, bad habit he has. His hair started to be longer. His curls were bigger and almost turned into waves. And his eyes were so emerald. He was looking at Rebecca with surprise while she was talking to him.

I came closer to them. Becky greeted me, and Harlow grabbed me by my arm.

-Hey, what are you...?

-Go inside, and tell us what's happening! -he said, all excited about it.

-Tell what?

-There is the girl with whom Oliver had an affair! And there's also Delia! Go now! - whispered Rebecca, all excited too.

-Why can't you go? Is your house! - I said.

-Well, those brats kicked me out. And I'll kicked you in if you don't go- warned me.

-Fine, fine! - I said, raising my hands. Once in the living room, the twins and Delia stared at me. I screamed, without even realizing it.

The girl was Nirvana. My Nirvana!

-Are you all right, Alex? -asked me Derek, all surprised.

-You... - I said.

-Yes! - exclaim Delia - this is the girl who doesn't respect anyone's boyfriend. Look for Harlow, Alex. She might want him too.

I was too shocked to even speak.

-He is not my type. Too pale- answered Sunny.

Just as how Nirvana would have done.

But of course, she didn't know me at all.

-What are you doing here? - asked me Derek, grabbing my hand and taking me to the kitchen.

-Harlow called me, told me to come, and tell him what's going on since Becky it's outside.

-Quick review- he said, opening his hands to talk- So Delia found some messages where Oliver told Sunny that he "loved" to be with her last night.

I was paralized.

-And she was about to leave when Sunny appeared. They are fighting with each other instead of dumping that dumbass and date... Each other, I don't know!

-This is so... Disgusting- I said, trying not to imagine myself in that sutuation and planning to tell Nirvana everything.

-Please, just go. Is not a good environment here and I need to get the chicks out of here before my parents come.

-Sure, no problem. Let Becky inside, she'll know how to run this.

Derek nodded and went back to the living room. Now, they were throwing stuff at each other. I walked behind him, and asked Sunny what was her last name.

-Why would you want to know it? I don't want your boyfriend okay? Don't be...

-I'm not being anything. Just, please, give me your last name.

Sunny was looking at me very confused.

-Brown. Sunny Brown.

Delia was about to burst.

-Why do you want to know her name? YOU ARE MY FRIEND, YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO...

-SHUT THE FUCK UP- I screamed.

They all looked at me, and at that moment, Harlow and Becca came in.

-Why are you fighting too? -asked Becca, confused.

Ignoring her, I said:

-I'm tired of seeing girls fighting over an idiot- and when Oliver opened his mouth to protest, I just went :- You shut your arse too, little piece of shit you are. How would you do that to Delia? HOW, OLIV? IS NOT FAIR! I can't believe this Delia, and you're blaming her instead of blaming the only guilty here? The perks a man receives are still amazing!

-But she... - started Delia.

-She nothing! She owes you nothing! She is not your friend, she didn't fail you or betray you at all. She just hurted herself, by thinking that someday she'll be the only one... When she has always been the second choice. And there's nothing more of a failure than that. - I looked at Sunny with unexpected hateful eyes. Delia is one of my best friends. I hated her and also Oliver. How could he?!

-He is going to do it to you. That's how naughty boys are- I told her. She was with tears after trying to take my friend even more deep in pain than where she already was.

-And you... Delia, don't get yourself at such a low level, gosh. You're so worth it.

When I was about to leave the house with Delia and Harlow, Oliver tried to talk to me.

-You better not talk ever again. I despise you. What you've done is disgusting. And to my best friend... You deserve nothing.

Delia was crying. It was obvious she loved him and wanted to make up this broken relationship.

-This is amazing- said Nirvana, looking through lenses to the new low-level girl, Sunny.

-I would literally never found you if it wasn't for this. Is not your name at all, except for the surname- I said.

-But that surname is from that moment of the past. The one where I was... Pregnant and... -

-You were mostly pregnant, so don't excuse yourself on that- I said, trying to make her laugh, but she just killed my mood with her eyes.

-You never told me your surname- I said.

-I have forgotten it. That's why it surprises me that this girl is a Brown. Is she perhaps...

-Your daughter? No, I don't think so! You're still young, just be patience. Besides it was from many, many years ago. This girl is our age!

-But maybe it wasn't she the baby, but her mom... Or even her grandma the baby that we saw that day! - said Nirvana, still amazed by seeing herself.

-You know, Sunny is kinda slut. Are you slut, too?

She laughed.

-I'm telling you, for sure I can't remember anything! Not as you started to do. I'm still unaware of how exactly I ended up here, right now- she said, pointing at my room.

-I brought you here because of this - I said, grabbing my necklace.

-Shall we tell Sam about another clon of her sister? - Nirvana asked.

-Let's better keep it quiet. Is still a huge disaster that she knows us already.

But the real disaster came later.

We were watching some movies with Nirvana. Of course, my mom wasn't at home because she probably was still chatting about Georgia's marriage.

Looking to comedy or romance has always been my pleasure, and watching them with Harlow always ended up nicely.

But today it didn't went like that, not only because of Nirvana instead of Harlow, or because Harlow went back to work.

But because Delia got in my house. In my room without knocking the door (she never did and I never cared. We were used to each other). She saw Nirvana there.

-I can explain! I swear! - I said, taking her hands.

Nirvana got a little scared of the situation, she looked at us very lost.

-I can't believe you! You're hanging out with... This slut! -and she talked to Nirvana. - First my boyfriend, and now my best friend? Why can't you just dissappear? Why you have to take it all away from me?

She was crying so hard, that Nirvana didn't know how to even approach her.

-Sunny took your boyfriend only, she took the shit out of your life. She never took and never will take me, because this girl, right here... Is not Sunny at all- I said.

-Do you think I'm a fool?

-But I'm not! My name is Nirvana.

And she tried to gave her hand to Delia's, but she just rejected it by hitting her on the face.

-WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU? - I screamed, putting Nirvana behind me.

It didn't work. Nirvana pushed me and I got on the floor. They were fighting and now, it was for real.

I got up and probably been trying to separate them for about 5 minutes, until accidentally, Delia grabbed my necklace while trying to not fall. She glanced at it and threw it away, without really looking what it was.

Bad decision. The necklace broke.

And both Nirvana and I, were gone. Now, we were completely trapped, and I don't know what are we going to do in...

I looked around, newspapers on the floor.

1914. An amazing year, just hitting World War I.

Nirvana lips were bleeding, and her nails were broken. Clearly, Delia was acting as a low bitch.

-I tried to stop her- I said, cleaning her mouth with a piece of napkin I've got in my jacket.

-Don't worry. I'm glad she's been hijacked like this.

-She is suffering a lot...

-And I don't blame her! It must hurt, for sure, but can't she be a lady for a while? She is acting ridiculous. You would never act like that.

She was right. I literally would NEVER. Is such a waste of time. Not even for Harlow.

-But we aren't the same person. I'm not defending her but the way she acts is comprehensible in some way.

-Whatever. I hope she doesn't get to hit Sunny too. Crazy bitch.

And without knowing where the hell we were going to go, we just kept walking through some abandoned streets.