*13*

“Cobalt blue, mushky blue, navy blue and this... prussian blue. Which one looks better!?”

“Well that's a...a lot of blue!” Shravan said quietly, seeming more confused than ever. “I mean you can go for any of these. All are actually… very blue.”

“What all are blue! You have to be specific. What do you think, which one would look better on me.” Anita exclaimed, batting her eyelashes.

Hearing a choking sound, I looked at Sam, whose fist was inside her mouth, barely stopping the laughter that was threatening to escape her.

“Stop laughing.” I shook my head, when a small smile lingered on my face, “Not everyone is colour blind like us.”

“Oh please Suman, look at her, she is trying all to allure Shravan whereas our genius is just clueless. How did he even land in this situation?”

I just shrugged looking at them, “That's none of our business.”

And how we landed in this situation? It's because there was a party...an after exam party to be precise, which one of our friends Ashima had decided to throw at her own house just to celebrate the fact that we had somehow managed to pass these four years of torture successfully!

And funnily enough, when Sam and I decided to go for dress hunting, we actually bumped into Shravan and Anita. Now what was Shravan doing with Anita or how she actually managed to pull him into this shopping spree, that was a complete mystery.

Though for some strange reason, Shravan looked very embarrassed when we said Hi to them, whereas Anita looked, well glared at us.

“Do you think they are dating?”

“Possible. They actually look good together.”, I answered while twirling in front of the mirror of the changing room, “the dress looks good you know, especially if I twirl…”

“Don't tell me you are twirling in there! Come on, let me see at least.” Hearing her demand, I came out of the changing room. “Oh! That red dress is just made for you Suman, I mean just look at you.”

I laughed, Sam was always very gracious while giving compliments, whereas she was looking absolutely sinful in the black dress she had chosen.

“Where are they?” Sam looked around, and when she couldn't find them, “I am telling you! Something is cooking, but I wonder how come Shravan isn't getting what that girl wants from him, when he loves you…”

“Excuse me!” I glared.

“Excused!” but she continued, “No no...I am missing something here.”

Sometimes it was just useless to talk to Sam. Somehow she never really understood what the other person would want. Being hopelessly romantic, she would see romance in every aspect of life.

Seeing Shravan and Anita together and that too when Shravan was really uncomfortable meeting me, clearly told me one thing. He didn't want me to know this.

But I wonder why! Yes it stung. He could have told me…

”Suman?!” I almost jumped, hearing his voice. As if he was there in my mind and just replied.

“Hey...where's Anita?” Sam asked. Always the over-enthusiastic!

Shravan just looked at me, “We didn't come together. I was already here. She came much later.”

“That's fine Shravan! Why exactly are you saying this?”

Again the over-enthusiastic Sam replied, “Because he owes you an explanation! When he likes you, he should have…”

“Sam!!!” I hissed, even Shravan looked embarrassed. He looked everywhere but me.

● ● ●

Exams were done, soon results would be knocking on the door. Last four years had been a riot. I made couple of true friends, mainly Sameera and Shravan. Where Sameera aka Sam upheld her craziness, Shravan still remained ‘a mystery’.

I could clearly see Sam, who was too busy dancing like a mad woman, shaking her head as if tonight was the last night we would ever see. Some other friends of us were also there with her, enjoying themselves. And all were clearly high on the beverages that were allowed by Ashima's parents.

Even though I was pretty much tempted to taste one of those colourful drinks, I reprimanded myself from doing so. Nanu would be very angry, if I didn't keep my

promises to him.

“Why exactly are you sitting here alone?” A sharp voice made me wince as I was thoroughly saturated with my thoughts. Sighing, I turned to look at a very irritated Anita. “And what do you want?” My eyes zeroed onto the nothingness behind her back. For some reason, I wasn't really interested in ruining my mood.

“Nothing actually!” To my surprise, she came near with a chair that she had dragged roughly on the floor. She sat there, looking at something, or rather someone...Shravan. “How come you are so oblivious Suman?”

“Sorry?!”

She smiled, and pointed towards Shravan, “How come?”

“I am not really getting what exactly you are trying to say, you know!” Well, I lied. I clearly knew what or whom exactly she was referring to. But for my sanity's sake, I preferred to stay ignorant.

“You know, why feign when I can clearly see you.” She sighed again, “He really likes you, you know.”

Now that was something I didn't expect from her, “And how do you know that?”

“I have eyes.” She chuckled, which actually warmed my heart. A girl like Anita, who always thought about how she looked, was actually observant.

“And you hate me for that.” I concluded.

Shravan liked me, wasn't a revelation to me. Sam had successfully instilled that long ago into me. But for some reason, I was sure that he liked me only as a friend, which could have been the reason that I was so free with him.

“Hate is such a strong word Suman. But yes, I don't really like you per se.” She turned towards me, as if desperately asking me for my attention. And I actually made a mistake by looking at her...her moist eyes. “It's like I have lost something to you. You may be intelligent, but nothing extraordinary that I haven't seen. Even you look quite normal...not someone drop-dead gorgeous… but there must be something in you, that Shravan bares his heart to you. But what?!”

Bemused, I tried to understand the direction this conversation was going in. She looked heartbroken, and the way she was scrutinizing my face... “Trust me when I say, Shravan Malhotra bares his heart only to Shravan Malhotra himself.”

She shook her head not agreeing with me, but I continued, “If you like him this much, why don't you go and confess?”

“I would have Suman, if he had shown towards me 0.01% of the interest he shows in you.” With that she got up abruptly, “Even if we switch our places Suman, he won't even look at me, he is just...so into you.”

“Anita...I…”

“Let it be Suman, I am fine. But please don't lead him into something which you cannot reciprocate, because boys like Shravan are very gullible.” And she turned on her heels, just to look back at me over her shoulder, “Shravan shouldn't know about this conversation. Though he doesn't like me but I don't want him to hate me either.”

● ● ●

Humans, the social animal, the most complicated one. We tend to cherish when other people praise us, we hate it when others criticise us. First Sam, and now Anita, both were observant enough to point it out clearly to me. Shravan likes me, which they saw and I didn't.

You didn't? A voice whispered, of course you did. You noticed, how his frown used to vanish whenever he saw you, how he introduced you to his Nani, how he was always there whenever you needed help with studies, how he let you know about his disorder, how he used to recite poems that were indication of his feelings. How could have you not noticed?

And that was when I decided to take a sip of one of those drinks. But what I didn't know about alcohol was, even if it would burn the throat, it was going to relax the mind. May be, that's why they say alcohol helps you to realise your innermost desires. I forgot the count of the sips I had taken, I forgot what I had promised to Nanu. All I could remember was Shravan.

Shravan…

May be on the very cue of my thought, a voice answered, “Suman…” Shravan! I sighed as I thought it's just because I was thinking about him. I ignored and continued with my drink.

“Suman…” the voice seemed confused. Just like me. “Suman…” this time I blinked, it was too loud to be in my head, so I peeked around slowly. And there he was standing, just behind me, with his eyebrows arched perfectly over his confusion-etched eyes.

“Hey…” I smiled and his eyebrows shot up to his hairline, “Oh my God!” He snatched away the glass I was holding, “Exactly how many drinks have you had Suman?!”

I tried to count on my fingers, when he groaned, “Let it be. Let's go.” He wrapped his fingers around my wrist.

“I don't want to go. I am having so much fun here…” I pouted, “no need to be such a spoilsport.”

“You are having fun because you are drunk. Two hours Suman! Just for two hours I left you on your own and see what happened. You are drunk out of your mind! ” Being the taller one, he just looked down at me as if he was talking to a kid. And boy! he looked scary. Eyes, which were confused a minute ago, were spitting fire right now.

I just fetched my hand back from his grip. I was irritated enough, and now he was trying to get me out of this party. Gathering all my wit, I snapped. “Then you shouldn't have left me. You leave me and people come to me and blame that I don't care about you.”

“What?”

“God! Now you can’t even hear!!! I said..people…” and that was when Shravan's head multiplied. Two more shravans were looking at me...bewildered. “Oh no! I cant handle three Shravans together.”

And three Shravans facepalmed themselves...together.

● ● ●

“You want to outrun the Flash? Can't you see I am drunk!” I wiggled out of his grip while trying to hold my steps.

“I am really not in a mood to discuss the characters of DC Comics. You need to be in your room soon. You can pass out at any moment.”

“You...you just don't want me to enjoy.” I grounded. As tired as I was, slight breezing lifted my mood, it felt nice on my sweating skin. “And people say you like me! Nonsense!”

For a few seconds, I thought I was alone, there in the pathway. “You know I li..care about you Suman. And I'd be damned if something happened to you. You are too drunk to realise it now. But it's really easy for other boys to do something bad with you.” His voice was low, sounded like he was anxious.

“And you wouldn't?” I asked, and three Shravans shook their heads together and I huffed, “ Please tell me which one of you is real? I am confused.”

A pair of hands held my face, “I can never hurt you Suman. Never!!” And I was clearly drunk. I so knew it. Because I liked it, when those warm hands caressed my cheeks very slowly and I closed my eyes at the feeling.

“I am not good at expressing myself Suman...all I can ask is to trust me. Trust me enough to believe that Shravan is not capable to hurt you even if you hurt me.”

And I put my arms around his waist, he stiffened instantly, clearly not expecting my move, but very slowly he hugged me back. And I hummed, his heart beat faster beneath my touch, his breath fanned over my head...and then I did something unexpected...

I planted my lips on his.

He stood rooted there, not moving an inch. He shoved me with enough force that I stayed in his arms yet my face was away from his, “Don't do anything that you won't remember in the morning.” He sighed, “How I wish...you would mean this...but now you need to go to your room.”

I tried to decipher his expression, but the lack of light and dizziness didn't help me much. I shook my head, “I mean this...but may be I am confused, I just don't know which head to kiss.” I mumbled looking at him. Three Shravans laughed together at this, and pulled me into them, hugging me tightly again.

I didn't know was it his masculine scent, or rhythmic heartbeat, or the slight movement of his chest, I felt my legs were slowly giving up and I let myself slip into peaceful oblivion, when I felt a soft nudge, “Suman…” I frowned, it felt like the voice came from my distant dream, “I love you, because I know no other way!” the voice whispered. I snuggled more into the voice, mumbling a soft “hmm”.

● ● ●