CHAPTER 14

After Thanksgiving I've been practically anxious all the time. Mom's gone back on one of her work trips so I was all alone at home again. I was left with nothing but my thoughts. Zach hasn't said anything since his outburst so I was scared for the rest of the break. I was scared I had lost him.

It was Monday, everyone was back from break now with the halls full of stuff promoting the Winter Formal. I sat there, my leg shaking as I watched the clock anxiously. Ian and I were going to meet after school today at the club room. I was nervous but I knew my answer.

Finally the bell rang and I frantically grabbed my things before racing to the club room. I wanted to get there before him. I got to the door and stared at it for a while before looking back at the school hall behind me. I started pushing all thoughts aside knowing I was doing this all for him.

For Zach.

If I just get this over with then I can explain everything to him and then tell him how I really feel.

My heart raced at the thought of us being together.

Just a little longer.

I got into the room and sat down tapping my foot. I heard the door handle jiggle from behind me and looked over my shoulder to see Ian walk in.

I got up and waited for him to get up to me watching his smile grow on his lips. I felt a stab in my chest as I watched it, feeling guilty already.

"Hey," I said nervously.

"Hi. Did I make you wait long?"

"No. I got here a few minutes ago."

"Alright. So..?"

I looked at the side and sighed.

"Is it okay if we sit?"

"I've got nothing against it."

I walked over to the couch and waited for Ian to sit down next to me. I took in a deep breath before looking at Ian.

"Let me just start off with the fact that you are a great guy."

Ian sighed.

"Are you rejecting me?"

I looked down. "Sorry..."

He sighed again and looked up at the ceiling.

"I didn't want to do this."

I paused as he said that and watched him take out his phone and tap a couple times.

"I know something that I don't think you want others to know."

My heart jumped at what he said as my brain went to a thousand things that he could have meant. But I had one main thing in mind

"Wh-what do you mean?"

He finished tapping around when he stopped and turned it towards me. My heart dropped as I looked at the picture he was showing me on his phone. My eyes went wide and I started to freak out a bit.

"What could you possibly do with this?"

It was a picture of Zach hugging me. He started to swipe through. Pictures of us secretly meeting up here. Pictures of him coming to my house at night with me coming out of his car.

Pictures of him kissing me.

I tried to stay calm and not let my voice shake as I struggled to get something out.

"True, these pictures might not be enough. But word runs like wildfire here. And we all know Emma hates you. Almost everyone knows about your past friendship."

"H-how do you have these anyway?! Were you following me?" I was practically shaking as I asked him, trying my best to yell.

"Maybe."

He smirked as he looked at me.

"Th-that's not funny Ian. Being a stalker is nothing to smile about."

"I wasn't stalking. I just happened to see."

I jumped up from the couch and went to grab my things when Ian grabbed my arm and pulled me down on top of him. I tried pushing him off of me feeling uncomfortable as he held me close and he tightened his grip on my arm.

"Ian this isn't funny. Let go of me."

I was shaking. I was terrified. I had no idea he could be like this.

"Let's make a deal."

I stopped and looked at him. The look in his eyes brought more fear. But for a second I got a burst of anger and glared at him.

"That's no way to look at someone with pictures of your secret love life."

I lightened my look and tried not to freak out.

"What do you want?"

My voice was still shaking. I wanted to get this over with.

"Be my girlfriend. Go out with me on dates and let me love you. Do that and I won't spread the pictures online."

"I-I can't do that Ian!"

"Oh that's too bad. Guess I'll just have to send these to everyone..."

"Wait!"

He looked at me with a smile and I felt my chest tighten.

"F-fine..."

"Perfect."

He let go of me and put his phone back in his pocket. I jumped up and backed up far away from him.

"I'm really glad you agreed to this Jessica. I really do love you. I promise I'll show you how I'm better than that douchebag football player. And then you'll be mine completely."

I looked at the ground feeling tears threaten to fall.

Why was this happening? I don't remember Ian being like this.

"I said I'd do anything to get the one I loved. It just sadly had to come to this."

Things were quiet for a bit as I waited for Ian to leave.

"I'm really sorry Jessica. I just need you to know that I'm better than him. Tomorrow after school, wait for me. I'll take you out on another date."

He opened the door and looked back at me before sighing a bit. I didn't move or say anything.

"I'll see you tomorrow."

I didn't respond to that either as he left. I fell to the ground after I knew he was a bit away and felt the tears fall a bit.

I wish things were back to the way they were. This is too much for me. I can't handle this. Why was this all happening to me anyway? I'm me. Why am I worth all this trouble? I shouldn't be.

I sat there crying when I heard a soft knock on the door. Shocked, I looked up at the door.

No one should still be at the school. It was a Monday afternoon. I stayed quiet as I waited for whoever knocked to go away.

"Jess, it's me..."

Zach?

"You weren't home when I checked so the next place I assumed was here."

I stayed quiet not knowing what to say or even do.

"Jess, you've been avoiding me these past couple days."

Me avoiding him? He's been avoiding me!

That doesn't matter though. He can't be here. He can't be with me. Ian knows. Ian knows everything and for all I know more people could know.

I felt myself get up and quickly run to the door and open it before crashing into his chest. I wrapped my arms around him as I softly cried against him. Without thinking about it he wrapped his arms around me and comforted me.

"I take what I said back."

I tightened my grip around him and pulled him into the room before closing the door and pushing him against the door as I kept my face buried in his chest.

"Are you okay? This isn't like you."

I looked up at him, tears streamed down my face.

"Zach...."

His eyes went wide at the expression I was giving him. I looked away and backed up.

"We can't hang out."

I almost couldn't finish saying the words. I knew it was wrong and it hurt. I just couldn't believe what I was doing.

He leaned in a bit but stopped as he looked at my tear stained face. He looked as if he wanted to ask a question but before he could he stepped back.

"Is this what you really want?"

I didn't respond. I didn't want to say any more.

"Please tell me what's wrong. Are you really okay?"

I didn't want to think about things. I didn't want to say anything. I just wanted to forget things and go home. I brought my car knowing I'd stay after and I couldn't stand being so close to him.

"I'm sorry but it's not fair to you to keep leading you on like this. You have Emma. Just accept it."

Zach looked at me confused as I kept my gaze down.

"Jessica, whatever is going on you know I'm here for you."

I sighed frustrated at the situation I was in. I didn't know what to do.

"It's nothing. Just go."

Zach's face looked extremely sad as he looked over mine and he sat up pulling me into a deep hug. I felt tears threaten to fall again but held them back as I wrapped my arms around him to feel his warmth. But too soon I pushed myself away and walked out of the room with my bag. I ran to my car and quickly went home.