Chapter Nine

Why am I so hot? Did I leave a heater on in my room? I can feel the stickiness of my shirt on my skin, stuck by sweat. I feel like I have fallen asleep in a volcano. I try to roll away from the scorching heat, but something is stopping me, like vines are wrapped around my body, pinning me to the bed. I push harder, hoping that the vines will detach themselves, but they only seem to grab onto me harder.

Reluctantly, I open my eyes, ready to shout at the thing that is keeping me to my bed, give them a good few curse words of my choosing. Slowly the blinding light from my open curtains floods my eye, making me squint. I never keep my curtains open. I frown and force my eyes open to survey the room, but everything looks normal, except for the persistent vines that are still trapping me to my bed.

I look down with a scowl, wanting to get out of bed and away from the scorching heat, maybe go open a window or something. Its not vines keeping me pinned to the bed, however, it's arms. Smooth, muscular arms that definitely do not belong to me. I trail my eyes up the arm to the shoulder, to the head, and see tussled brown hair that's gracefully fallen over a peacefully sleeping face, eyes softly closed, mouth open slightly as soft breaths come out in short pants. I can't help but stare at how calm he is. The sun is shining elegantly on his face, showing his perfect olive coloured skin glowing in the light.

I can't help but think how attractive he is right now, but that little niggling at the back of my head that reminds me that he is dangerous breaks the spell slightly. Yes, he may have killed people, but then again, that has never really been proven, only rumoured. I frown at the thought. Maybe everyone has pegged him wrong. Maybe he isn't a murderer, maybe he isn't as bad as everyone says he is, I mean couldn't it just be that Kayden has made this façade about himself to deter people from him? To make them believe that his is dangerous, when really, he isn't?

He has been so... caring? I'm not sure caring is the right word, but he has seemed to be attentive to me, especially yesterday. I have no doubt that he would've killed Tom yesterday, to protect me. 'I wouldn't forgive myself if something happens to you again and I'm not here to protect you', his words from last night ring through my ears, and it makes my heart jump a little. Does this terrifyingly scary man, this bad boy criminal, really care about me?

"What are you thinking about?" the sudden voice makes me jump a little, but the strong arms are still wrapped around me, squeezing me a little in a comforting manner. I didn't realise that I was still staring at Kayden's face while I was thinking. I blush and look away from his face, down to his naked chest. My blush intensifies as I realise that I have slept next to Kayden all night, while he has been naked from the waist up.

"One of these days Drew, you are going to tell me what is going on in that head of yours," he whispers quietly, obviously not wanting to ruin the calm, peaceful feeling of the room. He hooks a finger under my chin, forcing me to look up at him, to look into his eyes. I don't fight it, too dumbfounded at the situation that I am in. Kayden West is in my bed. I'm not sure many girls could say that.

"You are beautiful when you blush, Drew," I gasp at his soft words, the blush creeping into my cheeks as if on cue, making Kayden's eyes light up, and a slow smirk to spread across his face. I am paralysed by the intensity of his stare, the raw emotion that they hold. His eyes turn serious, his hand moving from my chin to cup the side on my face, his thumb slowly stroking my cheek. I can't help but close my eyes and lean into his hand. I have never felt this kind of touch before; gentle and caring, almost loving? No. I quickly shake the thought out of my head. I know that that is impossible, Kayden would never feel for me like that, and I would never feel for him like. We are only friends, I think. What are we? Are we friends? Acquaintances? People that hang out every now and then?

"I never thought I would see the day that Kayden West compliments me of all people," I chuckle slightly, trying to shake away the thoughts and feelings running throughout my body. That is something that I can dwell on when I don't have a partially naked Kayden in my bed.

"Well, don't you go expecting it all of the time," Kayden retorts, a smirk taking over his face, his eyes lighting up with amusement.

"I won't, don't worry," I laugh a little at his response. I watch with curiosity as his eyes sparkle with some foreign emotion that I haven't seen before, but it seems...peaceful. Everything seems to stand still as we stare at each other, the two of us still tangled up in his arms. His eyes flicker from mine to my lips, hesitation flashing through his features.

"I should get going," Suddenly, our moment is over and Kayden is pulling away from me, pulling the covers off of the two of us and getting out of the bed, revealing his tense, naked back to me.

"Why do you always do that?" I ask, a frown set deep on my face as I stare at his back. It seems like every time he gets a little too close to me, something switches on in his head and he pulls away, going back to being cold and distant. It happened at the fight between him and Tom, but that time Seth had stopped him. My frown deepens at the thought. Why would Seth need to stop him from...well I don't really know what he was going to do, but it is still strange that Seth would have to stop him.

"I don't know what you're talking about Drew," Kayden replies snappily, his body tensing more at my question.

"Why do you always pull away from me?" I ask quietly, my voice low, hoping that he doesn't actually hear me. Its a stupid question that I shouldn't even care about. It's not like anything would ever happen between us anyways. He's the bad boy and I'm the freak nerd, we don't exactly go together.

Kayden turns around to face me, his eyes alight with anger, but I don't think that it is aimed at me, it looks like he is having an internal battle with himself.

"I'm not good for you, Drew. The world I live in, it would break you, it would tear your soul straight from your body and force you to work for eternity to get it back," his words are forced out through clenched teeth. He runs a hand through his hair in exasperation.

"What do you mean?" I shuffle on the bed a little, getting closer to the side of the bed that he is stood at, hoping that I will be able to figure him out a little more if I am closer to him. Kayden closes his eyes, his hand tugging at his hair as his jaw clenches and unclenches. The sudden urge to comfort him rushes through my body, but I push it down. I don't think that he would want that right now.

"I'm dangerous, Drew, being with me is dangerous; I have enemies, people who will hurt you to get to me, who won't care if you die as long as they can get to me," my eyes widen at his words, and his face scrunches in anger and pain. "I know it was wrong, I knew that I was bringing you into a world that would hurt you, that would crush you, but I just couldn't stay away from you," he paces throughout his entire confession, his hands running through his hair in frustration.

"I tried so hard to forget about you after mine and Clarke's fight, but you just wouldn't leave my mind, you invaded my dreams, my every fucking thought was of you. I had to know more about you, I had to learn everything there was to know about you. I got Seth to ask Erin questions about you, just to quench my curiosity, but it wasn't enough; the more I learned about you, the more I had to see you, to ask you these things myself," I can't do anything except stare up at him as he paces in front of me. My mind is blank, trying to take in everything that he is saying.

"I was so angry at myself that I had let it get this far. You're just a girl, I have managed to forget about plenty of girls before you, girls that I have done a lot more with," I frown at his comment, anger and jealousy suddenly bubbling up from deep inside of me, but I push them back down. I have nothing to be jealous of; Kayden and I are nothing, he is not mine to be jealous over.

"But, fuck, you were just this puzzle that I had to put together, this problem that I just had to solve. Everything about you intrigued me, the way you would tie your hair up some days and leave it down others, the way you dressed even fucking intrigued me!" Kayden throws his hands up in frustration, his voice rising with every sentence, and all I can do, is sit on the bed and stare at him.

"Seth warned me so many times that I was getting too close to you, that I was putting you in danger, and I knew that he was right, he's always fucking right!" It's almost as if Kayden is ranting to himself now more than he is to me. His pacing hasn't stopped yet, but his mind seems to battling with itself on what he should be telling me and what he shouldn't.

"Kayden, I don't understand," I can't help but voice my confusions, hoping that he will tell me the route of his problems so then maybe I could help in some way, or maybe I can finally understand what he is actually trying to tell me.

"What I'm going to tell you Drew, is dangerous. You can't repeat it to anyone," his voice is now stern, demanding that I heed his warning. I nod my head as he looks down at me, his eyes cold and just as demanding as his tone.

"My dad runs the biggest gang in the city, we mostly trade in illegal firearms, but recently we have progressed onto drug deals, anything from weed to coke, anything that anyone could need or want. My dad is strict, there are to be no distractions in the gang, no loose ends, no weaknesses," I stare at him blankly, my mind completely shutting down now. This can't be real, surely not. This is stuff that only happens in movies and books, not in real life! Kayden looks pained as he looks down at me, as if he is able to hear my thoughts.

"As soon as my mum gave birth to me, my dad divorced her, got custody of me, and forced my mum out of the city. He only needed someone to pass the business down to, he didn't need the extra hassle of a wife to try and keep safe," Kayden's eyes are hard, clouded with pain and anger.

"I was brought up to be the same as him, and for nineteen years of my life, I have been heartless and ruthless," I take a sharp intake of breath at his words. He is dangerous. All of the rumours about him are true. I don't doubt that he has killed people now. Would he have killed Tom yesterday if I didn't stop him?

"Yesterday, when Lehmar saw us in the club, my whole world crashed around me, and I knew that I would have to leave you, no matter how hard it would be," I can feel my heart beating in my ears as I stare up at this complicated man pacing in front of me, spilling his most sacred secrets to me.

"When I dropped you off yesterday, I planned for that to be the last time that I ever saw you again, but then I got the call from Seth, saying that Clarke had attacked you, attempted to rape you," He closes his eyes at the thought, his fists clenching at his sides in anger.

"I have never felt such anger before, towards Clarke and myself. I left you thinking that I would be putting you out of harms way, but I basically delivered it to your front door. I was going to kill him you know, for even trying to think that he would be allowed to touch you without some sort of consequence," his fists shake at his sides, his eyes still closed. I can't do anything but stare at him from my position on the bed, frozen as o think about what his words mean. "If you didn't stop me, I would've killed him Drew," and his burning blue eyes meet mine, their gaze intense, trying to pry any reaction they can from me, to gage how I'm feeling right now.

"Who was that man yesterday?" I choke out, my throat going dry as dread fills my body.

"Dylan Lehmar, he is the son of a rival gang leader. He is as ruthless as me, if not more. We used to train together, our father's were once allies, before Lehmar's father betrayed us and sold us out to the out the Rossi gang. They came and burned down our house, stole our guns and killed half of our men," Kayden closes his eyes, his face torn into one of sorrow and grief. For the first time since I have met him, he finally seems human, able to feel human emotions other than anger mockery.

"I was twelve when that happened. My uncle died in that fight, along with Seth's father and mother. My father waged war on the Rossi family ever since then. We are ordered to capture any Rossi that we find and take them back to my father to torture and kill," my mouth is dry, my hands trembling and heart is beating out of my chest as I take in the information. How can he just stand here and talk about this as if we were discussing the weather? He doesn't even seem to be showing any remorse for the people that he has inadvertently killed.

"If rival gangs find out," Kayden closes his eyes, taking a deep breath before he continues, and I know that whatever he is going to say is not going to be good, "If a rival gang finds out about you, then you will be kidnapped, tortured, raped, killed. They'll see you as my one and only weakness, and they will come for you. Lehmar already knows, and he is more than likely to have told his father by now, which means you will be a target for them now," he winces at the thought, his eyes still closed tightly.

"They-they're goi-going to kil-kill me?" My voice is barely above a whisper, but I know that he heard me by the way that his body flinches.

"I won't let that happen Drew, no one will hurt a hair on your head; I will not let anyone fucking touch you,"

"He would use you as a way to teach me a lesson. He would probably kill you in front of me," my tears begin to fall again, the fear fogging up my every sense.

"He would probably make me torture you," his whispered words make me whimper. I pull out his arms harshly, standing in front of him as a shaking mass of limbs.

"Would you do it?" My voice is small, barely even a whisper.

"Drew, it will never come to that, okay?" He gets up off of the bed, quickly grabbing my face in his hands so that I am staring straight into his eyes. "I won't give him the chance to get his hands on you, I will kill him before he will ever be able to hurt you," I close my eyes, not being able to look at him anymore. He would kill his own father to keep me safe, kill his own family for me. How can a man so dangerous be willing to risk so much for me?

"Do you trust me?" His question makes me frown. I have only known him for a month, I barely know anything about him, well I definitely know more now, but do I trust him?

"Yes," I whisper quietly, breathy as my mind decides for me. I trust Kaden West.

"Then trust me to keep you safe, trust that I will protect you with my life," I open my eyes to look into his hypnotic blue ones. I could get lost in the blue oceans of his eyes. It would take an eternity to fully search every inch of them, but I am willing to take an eternity to do just that. I want to find all of the secrets that they hold.

"You understand that if I stay, it will make you mine Drew," my eyes widen at his words. The man's words from the ring suddenly echo through my head, 'A little birdy told me that you had claimed a girl'. Is that what he is doing now? Claiming me as his? I don't know if I like the idea of being claimed, it sounds almost animalistic, primal even.

"You're claiming me?"

"Fucking Lehmar," Kayden curses under his breath, taking his hands off of my face and running them through his hair in frustration.

"That's just a terminology in our world, its so that other people in the gang know that you are not to be touched or messed with. Seth has done it with Erin, although I don't think he's told her that. I don't think he's told her anything actually,"

"Wait, Seth is in your gang?!" my voice is loud and high pitched, making Kayden wince.

"Well, yeah. Wasn't that obvious? All of the boys in our group are in my dad's gang," I blush in embarrassment. Of course they are, that does make sense and seem pretty obvious now that he points it out.

"But he hasn't told Erin about any of this? Won't she be in danger like I am?" sudden panic sets in as I remember how public the two of them have been. Kayden shakes his head, looking almost jealous?

"Seth doesn't have to worry about anyone going after Erin because he's not technically a vital member of the gang. I will inherit the gang in a few years, I will become the Don, which means if I fall, the whole gang falls, which is why you would be in so much danger,"

"So, let me get this straight, in a few years you will be running a gang, an illegal firearms and drug dealing gang?" I can't help but laugh a little at the situation that I am being placed into. I guess it beats the boring life that I have had so far. 'Oh yeah, that's the point to focus on, the entertainment of it,' my subconscious scowls at me snidely, her theoretical head shaking at my thoughts.

"I get that this is a lot to take in,"

"That's the understatement of the year!" I laugh louder, pacing in front of Kayden, who is standing in the middle of the room, looking like a deer caught in headlights, not really knowing what to do.

"Like shit Kayden, I knew you were dangerous and quite frankly bad news, but this is a whole other level of fucked up!" I throw my hands in the air, "and yet here I am, seriously considering "becoming yours" as you say, not that I even really know what that means, and become an enemy to your father, who at any moment could come and kidnap me and make you torture me in what, I can only assume, is some dingy dungeon under your house, where I will more than likely spend the last moments of my life," I ramble on as I continue to pace in front of Kayden, verbally thinking about everything that he has told me so far. God, I am in way over my head. I stop pacing as I hear Kayden chuckle deeply from beside me, his eyes dancing with amusement.

"You find this funny?" I put my hands on my hips, staring him down with a frustrated look. This only makes his eyes dance brighter.

"You realise that this is longest you have gone without stuttering? You even swore at me,"

"And you're happy about that?" I frown. This guy couldn't get any weirder if he tried.

"I'm happy that you are finally getting comfortable with me," I blush at his words, my frustration and agitation towards him disappearing at his words.

"And to answer you question," my eyes widen as Kayden walks up closer to me, his eyes intense and determined.

"When I say that you will be mine, I mean that every part of you is mine. Your mind," he points to my forehead, "your heart," he places his hand over my heart, pulling me closer to him by my waist, "and your body," my breath hitches in my throat as he grabs my chin between his finger, pulling my lips to his.