Chapter 15 - Talked

Sabrina's POV

I looked and waited for him to talk but no words came out of his mouth so I tried to walk again.

"Sab, wait!" he gently grabs my arm the reason I looked at him.

He avoided my gaze "A-are you mad at me?" he asked and I can't help but feel annoyed at him.

"You're the one who's avoiding me and then all of a sudden you'll ask me if I'm mad at you? Are you playing with me, Red?" I snapped at him. I just don't understand him.

"O-of course not. I'm sorry for acting strange lately, can we just sit first and talk about this??" he begged and I let out a heavy sigh before heading to one of the benches near us.

I pictured Red as a man full of confidence and knows what he wants in life but tonight I see a different version of him. He looked lost and his eyes spoke insecurities and remorse in life.

I remained silent until we reached the bench and sat. He sat next to me. I saw how tensed he was like he's weighing things on what he was about to say.

"My Mom died because of me" he started and then looked at me in the eyes like he wanted me to listen, not just hear it, but to understand where is he coming from.

I stared at him. I can see different emotions in his eyes. He looked up at the sky like it's his source of strength to speak up about his Mom. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

The light from the lamp post near us and the sky illuminated by the moon gave Red a dark and mysterious aura. His aquiline nose complemented his prominent cheekbones. It's unfair how can someone has a perfect face that it looked as if they were sculpted and made to perfection.

I shook my head to get rid of my thoughts.

I felt that he's hesitant and I know it took him a lot of courage to bring that topic up.

"Sorry about your Mom but you don't have to tell me about this. I would respect your---"

"But I want you to know. I want to talk it with you" he said and then looked at me in the eyes. For a moment, I found myself getting lost in his eyes.

"I was a rebel kid back then. Suspension, expulsion, liquor, street fights, behind bars, you name it, I experienced it all. U-Until that night" I saw the pain in his eyes. He's revisiting a painful memory and tonight he just let it take over him.

"Mom was involved in a car accident" he clenched his fist and I saw how he tried to compose himself. "A-And you know where she's going when the accident happened?? She was going to the police station where I was detained. Sabrina, my mom died because of me"

He said it like he's reminding himself that he's the reason why his Mom is gone. He's the reason why his Dad hated him and he's the reason why their family will never be the same again.

"No! Stop blaming yourself Red. Do you think your Mom will be happy if she sees you like this?" I said to comfort and enlighten him. I know it's hard and I don't have the right to question how he feels but it shouldn't be that way.

Red shook his head like he didn't agree with what I just said.

"There are days I wish I'm the one who died instead --"

"Stop it! You know it's not good to wish for death when someone out there prays every day to extend their life even just for a day." I seriously said to him.

Sometimes, we've taken things for granted. Waking up every day is already a blessing, sharing a proper meal with your family is also another blessing. Not all people are given a chance to experienced that so that's more than enough reason for us to be grateful, but the nature of a human will always prevail. We always want more, we are greedy, selfish and we will never be satisfied in life not until we experienced pain and hardships that will make us realized how we tend to forget and appreciate the people around us.

Yes, life may be cruel but with our loved ones around us, it will all be worth it.

"I know but things are different with me. Dad is never the same. I strived to change for the better. I excelled in school and sports hoping that Dad will forgive me and-- of course Mom, wherever she is now, but despite my efforts Dad still didn't believe that I have changed." he said and then laughed sarcastically. His eyes speak about pain, longing, and fear.

I stayed silent. I wanted to say the right words to him. Red looked in my way liked his reading what's on my mind.

"Thank you for trusting me. I know it took a lot of courage for you to open up private family matters such as these. You know things happened to give us lessons, though sometimes in a hard and painful way and I admire you for what you have become." I seriously said. I felt him stiffened as he dwelled on my words.

"Instead of getting lost because of what happened, you managed to get out from your dark past and brought yourself to light" I added and smiled at him. "Look at you now, it's enough proof that you're no longer the Red that they used to know. We have a responsible College Governor and I'm sure your Mom is very proud of what you have achieved in life. At the end of the day, you've learned your lesson and able to get back on track. Now, let me ask one favor from you" I said and he looked at me with curiosity in his eyes and waited for what I'm going to say.

"Please learn to forgive yourself, Red. Don't be too hard on yourself! " I genuinely said.

I just hope and pray that one day he finds forgiveness in his heart. I lifted my head and looked up at the sky.

I felt him looking at me so I looked at him and caught him staring intently.

"Your Dad might not see it now, but just continue what you're doing, do not lose hope. I know, soon he will." I encouraged him.

"I hope so.." he smiled sadly.

"Sorry as well if we offended you with our report. Maybe we were a bit less sensitive. But I promised, it's not our intention to--"

"No, I'm the one who's at fault. I overreacted. You're just doing your report" he said. "That's the reason I've been avoiding you lately. You may think that's a bit childish act but I really felt ashamed. I'm sorry." he said like he is pleading for understanding.

I'm not really used to seeing him being like this. I preferred to see the goofy and cheerful Red.

I closed my eyes when the strong wind suddenly blows. I felt cold maybe because of what I'm also wearing but I opened my eyes when I felt something on my shoulder.

Red put a black tuxedo coat on my shoulder.

"It's getting cold in here," he said as he loosened his collar and tie.

"Thanks" I briefly said. I suddenly remember that I have to text Mom so our driver could pick me up already. So, I took my phone out and texted Mom.

"You're going home already?" he said when he noticed me busy with my phone.

"Yeah, I just texted my parents"

My parents replied and told me that our driver is on the way already.

"Can I ask you one little favor, too?" I looked at him, suddenly suspicious of that little favor that he's going to ask.

"Let me know what is it first! You know you can't blame me for doubting you, right?" he suddenly burst into laughter and I can't help but smile at him too. His laugh is contagious.

"Hey, I just want to have a selfie with you. There you go with your imagination again" he took his phone out of his pocket "If is it okay with you?" he asked.

I nodded but I'm still suspicious of why he suddenly wants to have a picture of us together.

"This is for?" I asked when he sat close beside me.

"Relax, I just want to have a remembrance, besides don't you want to have a picture of your first Acquaintance Party?" he explained to me, convincing me that he had no hidden agenda.

"Now, smile Sabrina" and then he clicked the camera. We had three more shots before he was satisfied.

"Thank you," he said and saw his pleased smile on his lips.

Before going to sleep that night, I received a friend request notification from Red. I just shrugged and confirm it and then I doze off to sleep.

***

I woke up late the next day. Good thing, it's Sunday and I have all the time to just enjoy lying on my bed. If I hadn't been hungry, I might have slept all day.

My parents mentioned that they will be going out of town today as they are meeting with some potential investors and clients. I still can't believe that Daddy is here with us and I know he will be successful in the construction industry.

I was in the middle of my delicious meal when Cheska suddenly called. I quickly answered the call and put her on a loudspeaker.

"Sabrina!!! Who's he????" Cheska excitedly asked me.

"Who? What are you talking about?" I asked her as I really don't have an idea of what she's talking about.

"On your friendsbook, duh!?" she said it like it would help and give me an idea of what she's referring to.

"What about my friendsbook? I haven't checked it yet. Why?" I casually asked her and continued eating.

"Then check your friendsbook now. After that, call me and explain to me who's that guy you're with last night." and then she dropped the call.

Last night? Who is she referring to?

Instead of guessing, I quickly opened my friendsbook account and I almost spit out the food I ate when I saw the notification.

*Red Salazar tagged you in a post.*

It's our selfie picture last night. In that picture, we are both smiling and his tuxedo coat was still on my shoulder.

His caption is just a simple "Thank you" but I was more surprised when I saw a lot of comments and some even shared the post. Is Red really that popular on our campus that even here on his social media accounts are being monitored by his admirers??