Chapter 4

The week flew by with such intensity, Leigh missed it. She didn't dare go back to the stream. The creepy feeling, the man... no, what really scared her was the fact that she may have stumbled upon a clue, something that would bring all those bad memories back. Besides, as long as they didn't have Sky's body, there was no proof that she was dead. Leigh wanted to hold onto that small hope, that tiny sliver of light, that Skylar was still alive. Finding proof that she wasn't - maybe even knowing how she had suffered in her last moments - scared Leigh so much she couldn't go back. Not for a full week. Not until Madelaine and Oliver came to visit.

As it worked out, her father didn't want Leigh to leave Jasper just yet. Who knew why. He would probably be relieved to get Leigh out of the house for a little while. She had been driving him crazy with her incessant cleaning.

The whole house had been deep cleaned, with some new layers of paint and wallpaper, it was almost bearable. Leigh had even picked up all the trash in the yard and made a recycling system near the shop. She knew her father was uncomfortable with the changes, but she didn't really care. All he had to do, was live with his daughter he hadn't seen in four years, and recycle a few cans in his clean house. What was so hard about that? For Leigh, everything had changed. Her beloved mother had died, she had moved back to this dreaded town, she had literally moved around for two years before settling in Banff to 'get away from everything.' Then they moved 290 kilometres away from Jasper. Go figure.

She thought things might go back to normal. Maybe the radio piece was just another thing to throw into her life. It was like life was almost doing it sarcastically now.

Oh, what's that? You're trying to be normal and move on with your life? How about we just THROW SOMETHING IN THE WAY?!

Life was cruel. As Leigh turned the corner of her road, Ash stood there, grinning broadly and waving.

"Hey, Leigh! How's it going? I wanted to come by, but I didn't know your address." She smiled. Her frizzy red hair was forced back into a low bun, large blue eyes shining as usual.

"Um, hey Ash. Yeah, I wanted to see you too, I was just really busy. Spring cleaning and all that." Leigh tried for a smile, then stopped when she saw her confused face.

"But it's the middle February..." She looked a little hurt, then burst out laughing. "I'm just messing with you! Hey, can you give me your number? We can hang out this weekend!" Leigh started to nod her head, then shook it instead.

"No?" Asked Ash in a confused, hurt tone.

"No - I mean yes - I'll give you my number, I just can't this weekend. My freinds are visiting from Banff, so I can't this weekend." Leigh said. Ash's shoulder slumped a little bit.

"Oh." was her only response.

Her dissapointment didn't last long though, and she soon started telling Leigh all about her puppy. The week dragged on, and Leigh was waiting on pins and needles for her freinds to show. The whole week was slow and painful, and her dad thought that this would be a good idea to at least try to get Leigh back in his life. He came home straight after work (he left after dark to drink with his freinds), frequently found excuses to walk to the attic, and tried for sit down dinners every night. It was driving Leigh insane.

"You know." He said, breaking the silence from the awkward dinner silence one night. "I love what you've done with the house - no, I really do! It feels a lot cleaner. I was thinking..." He trailed off, picking at his canned peas.

"Maybe we could paint the house sometime. You know, the outside? We used to do that all the time... maybe a new colour?" He suggested. Her father's hopeful look somehow burned an ugly anger into her. So now he wanted to be her freind? Now he wanted to try? It had been nearly two weeks. Two weeks! Leigh slammed her fork down on her plate.

"Are you serious?!" Leigh shouted, jumping up.

"Leigh!" Her dad said, putting down his fork.

"What, you think just because I'm stuck here with you, I would automatically want to be your friend? I'd want to go back to playing Clue every night with you? Those days are over, dad! Face it! Everything has changed." Leigh didn't mean to burst out. "Everything. Has changed." She didn't mean to cry. But before she knew it, she was full on sobbing, her dad holding her close to his chest, kissing the top of her head.

"It's ok. It's ok" He said over and over. But it wasn't. It really wasn't ok. Leigh felt hurt and tired and sad. She felt like an open wound. Stinging, hurting, trying to heal...

About twenty minutes later, Leigh was laying in her attic bed, staring at the wooden ceiling. She curled onto her side, staring out the tiny window instead.

Madelaine and Oliver are coming. She told herself. They'll make everything better...

The next morning, Leigh's dad stayed home from work, and told Leigh she didn't have to go to school today. She sat in the living room, mindlessly watching Disney shows. She checked her phone.

MadHatter: on our way Princess!

Princess was their pet name for her. Oliver was Greek Olive, Madelaine was MadHatter, and Leigh got stuck with Princess Leia. She hated that name.

"It doesn't even make sense." She had told Oliver when he suggested it. "My name isn't even Leia. It's Leigh."

"Oh come on." He had replied. "It's the best I can come up with. Better than Leigh's chips anyway. Can you imagine? We would have to call you Chippy!"

Leigh felt the familar tug of sadness in her stomach again. Before her mom, Leigh had never understood why people always said 'the pain in her heart' up until that point, Leigh had felt of her emotions deeply rooted in her stomach. When she was little, she thought there was something wrong with. Her mother had laughed and said that was normal. Even now, Leigh felt every emotion in her stomach, a knot that was constantly being twisted and pulled in different directions. She imagined her emotions like different coloured strings attached to the main knot. The yellow one for happy, the red for anger, the blue for sadness.

She knew that those strings were not enough. Human emotions are way too many and too complex to record, so her emotion strings were endless. Anytime she felt any emotion other than 'neutral' she imagined a finger plucking that string, sending a chorus of emotion through her. Like playing a guitar. When she didn't know what to feel, someone was strumming an elaborate tune. The knot in her stomach never eased, it hadn't since Skylar had been taken. She wondered if it was the guilt, or all of her complex emotions lumped into one, the result of playing such a complex tune. Her phone lit up.

BurnMeToAsh hey

Leigh.h Hi? Who is this?

BurnMeToAsh don't you get the clever email? It's ash

Leigh.h oh yeah haha sorry I guess I didn't look

BurnMeToAsh relax, nothing to say sorry about. anyway, im wating at the street corner and...?

Leigh.h oh! sorry, im not feeling well today. see you monday?

BurnMeToAsh yeah, no problem. you might want to get out here tho. theres some old woman asking for you. she keeps grabbing my shoulders and yelling your name. its freaking me out a little bit. i told her you arent here. you coming out, or should i tell her to go away?

Leigh.h I'll be right there