The Realisation

We seated our seat. I do help them if they need anything. I too hungry but I tell them that I will eat later even Molly also said the same. But we know that truth. We help everyone if anyone need anything.

" It's delicious" Jake said. And all are agree with them.

" You ladies did good job.." Chase said. And I Rolle my eyes.

" So you guys are study together." My dad ask Chase. My dad know Jake and Zoe. But the first time other than my friends he is new to come.

" Yeahh we are study together. And your daughter is to smart and intelligent. Sometimes she did help me for study's sir.. " he said politely to my dad. And i am impressed hearing that.

" Ohh don't be.. just call me James." My dad said. Hmmmm my did also impressed.

" So what you want to do in future.." my brother Richard ask him.

" Well I didn't really think but i do play football. And I am interested to  go with that.. " he said.

" What is the your  relationship with my little sister.. " Nathan saidn and glaring at me. And Chase sacred little and choke. I give him glass of water to drink it. And he did accept it. And than we both look each other once after that he give genuine smile to my brother.

" I look at her to my little sister. You don't have to worry about it. I already have girlfriend. And we love each other so much.. " he said. And than Nathan embarrassed the way he act with him.

Did they think that we have thing so somthing. I mean really.

" Seriously brother. If I do have friends with other male that doesn't mean that I am dating or anything.. " i said.

" Relax Maddi he's you brother he have every right to know about her sister life. " Chase said. And I roll my eyes.

After that we move on other topics. It's about Zoe and Jake's relationship. There family happy for them. And they did tell about there future. And they are supporting them.

Like this the whole day we enjoyed. And I am glad it when well.

After saying goodbye to everyone. Chase do come and talk to me little after than he also left. And than its just us.

We ordered pizza. Me and Molly think about spend some time together where Richard are go for meet there old friends. Reilly and Nathan go to there room for rest.

Mom dad also bussy in there own think. So me and Molly decided to spend time each other for our catch up.

We talk about everything. And I trust Molly. And I know that she is always be my side. And I don't have to hide anything to her. I could said thst she is my best friend list.

" So Chase guy he is good boy you know." She siad. and we are now in my room eating pizza and talking.

" Yeahh he is. And I am so happy for Becca that she have boyfriend like Chase.. frist when she introduced us with him. I thought he is football jock. Who just Flirt with everyone and sleep around. But he is nothing like that.. " i tell her.

" Mmmm seems like you have cursh on him or somthing.. " Molly said and than I laugh at her comments.

" Trust me Molly there is nothing like that. He just help me sure that i am going good or not. " I tell her. She give me question look.

" Okky first promise me you don't mad at me. And you are not telling everyone everyone means not my brother also.. " I tell her very serious voice.

" Your wish my command. I promise. " She said and smile.

" The thing is that last year junior party Becca and Zoe force me to go. So i did. We enjoye I alot. But i drink a lot that time I didn't even remember that what happened that night but when i wake up I am not alone.." I tell her. Her eyes wild hearing this.

" He is badboy and caption of the football team. And after that we started to you know made deal with friend's with benefits." I tell her hesitatelly.

" I can't believe it Maddi you will do somthing like that. I mean why the hell you have to do that." She is mad. i know.

" Hear me out will you.." i tell her and she sign and nodded with her head.

" He is dating one of girl whom now we all are friend's. I know her girl she is so sweet and loyal with him. But she is to goody type of girl. So she is not ready to anything. So when we made deal I did told him that when somthing happnd we do stop this. And also he is not going sleeping around when we both are doing this. And he also agree with my all conditions. After that I don't know what happened. We don't know what happened. We started to addicted to each other. And he is posessive about me. And I like it but still I feel like other girl. Because he still with that girl. And Chase happen to be he's best friend and he know everything about it. So he help me so much. He told me that  girl is orphan she don't have no one except him. So I end all things with him. I don't want to be reason to there break-up. And she is really nicr girl. And I don't want to lose her too. plus knowing her We become very good friend." I tell her. I started crying. Damn it. Why can't I control it.

" Damn it.. I am sorry for this.." i said bad laugh and wipe my tears.

" You don't have to be. And I am proud of you Maddi that you ended all things with him But I am still mad that what you did. When you know that he already have relationship with another girl. You still made him cheat on her. If something same happened to you what will you do. How you feel it." She said to me and that make me more guilty.

" I know. That's why I try to avoid them. And distance with them. He did told me in halloween party that he is not going to leave me. He don't want to end things. He even don't like if I hangout with guys. Other than who's not our group boys. In the Halloween party he fight with the boy who just dance with me. And threatened him to not to ever look at me or ever come to touch me or close with me. He is always posessive and always are in Angry mode." I tell her. And smile thinking about it.

" See I get it everything. But still you see he is still with that girl. And I know that guy like him. See Maddi i don't want you to be broken. Maybe he did have want you only for he's physical need. Who knows. But I just want to tell you. No request you Begg you to to stay away from him. I don't want you to be hurt or broken. " She said. And hug me and I hug her back.

" Okky I am doing it. It's just few months more. After that we all we bussy in our own life. We all part away. And I never see him again. " I tell her.

" I know but still.. you don't know what happened next. So you have stay strong. And don't come to your heart to take decision. Our heart is so stupid blind my love. That  we never see what's coming. So I want to say than whatever you do you have to use your brain. Not heart. And I know you are strong. You will be getting over with him. " she said and I nodded with my head. I hope I will. I don't want to be in side chick who's always cry for guy.

" I know that when me and your brother snake out and meet secretly. And do things that we never do. That time is look fun and all but we never see that our actions hurt others. " She said.

" You know my family how they are. And my brother. Damn it. There is no way in hell possible that for us. But I am happy that your brother didn't give up. He is stay always by my side. He is with me that's why we are still together. We both trust each other that whatever happen we will face together. Because of him I did fight with my perents and tell them he is not that bad guy. When my brother know. He don't have problem with your brother it's just that when it's about family they forget about friendship and all. And I dont want you to be suffer like us. You don't even know what that kid want. Did he even have feelings for you or not. One person can't make it all good. You getting my point. There is nothing to you to be wait for him. Or anything. To believe him. He is hapyp with that girl. And he is still with that girl. I don't care what is about that girl background. But still if he really want to be with you he know he's way. How to do. So don't hope that he will come back. " She is right. Every damn thing she said it's all right. I don't have to tell myself everyday that he do have feelings for me we did to Lily. He still want to be with me. When I also know we do have only one relationship is just physical. Nothing else. I didn't even know anything about him so did he. Why I think that he are interested in me or somthing.

It's just me that thinking that. And making my life hell thinking about that I am hurting him. Or somthing when he is happy in he's life with Lily and enjoy everything with her. And here I am losing my friends for him. Lossing everyone and become Lonar.

I didn't said to Molly. But the way she tell me I am agree with her. For him I don't have to sacrifice my happiness. My friend's.

It is my last year. After that I didn't even know we all meet again or somthing. We all are going to be bussy in our own life. Than why i am avoiding all this. I don't have to. And i am not doing it again. If he have problem for me he will leave. Why should I. I already lose lots of things for him. When there is nothing that he lose. He have everything. Ughhh. Why can't I think before.

Because you are not even talk about it to anyone. If you do you will know it that how you doing all this wrong. My inner voice snap at me.

Now I am not going to hide. Why should I when I did nothing. He cheat on her girlfriend. Not me. Well i did made deal with him but he still want to do continue so it's not my fault. I did stop lots of time so why should I talk all blame. I will be not taking blames anymore. The hell out of for him. I will enjoy my life. This is my senior year. And I want to enjoy this with my friends. Make great memories before we part away.

I didn't even know that last time when I spend time with themm month or two. I don't know. Chase is always said to me to come join lunch. But I am the stubborn one that I didn't see that. But now I am not going to do anything. I am enjoying my life with my friends if anyone have problem with that. Than they can get lost or somthing.