EPISODE

you can't see it coming...

maybe some thing might trigger it...

you can be happy...

you can be sad...

you feel like you are alone and you have no one....

they say it's only in your head...

but why it is so hard to fight...

everyday I feel like I need to wake up and face the world again. it's tiring but what can I do?

every time I feel like I'm in a battle that I need to win but I'm also thinking of how can I win? If I'm battling with myself?

how to continue?

if you can't think of anything...

like a blank paper...

am I crazy?

NO!

I'm someone who is having my episode I can be fine but I can be also not fine.

but how this happen?....

that's the question I'm asking all the time but the answer is always NULL.

I try to find my answers but it always ends with nothing.

I questioned myself for having this...

but...

i will end up thinking about bad things...

some will say that it's not a big deal you're just SAD.

but that SAD can last up to...

weeks...

months...

years...

still no one will notice

because we are just SAD.

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I woke up everyday and do the things I need to do...

because this is life we still need to do somethings so that we can feel that we are still ALIVE...

even though we didn't know if this is LIFE....

yes this is how my everyday life...

how can I go through each day knowing that my mind is somewhere else and not cooperating to my body...

a lot of thoughts are coming to my mind but it seems that I can't understand. it feels like its a foreign language to me. but I want to understand it but I don't know how...

some days its empty like a shell...

its so quiet...

and its frightening...

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but i didn't let it control me...

it was hard...

it was never easy fighting against yourself...

but I want to fight for myself and for the people who love me...

but I also need to love myself...