XV.

XV.

"Jonakyn!". Jonakyn looked at her cousin.

" what?". She asked flabbergasted.

She looked around and finally know the fact that her classes are already done and she was still dumbfounded.

" what's wrong with you? Are you okay?". Her cousin asked worriedly.

"Are you having nightmares again or are you..". She added but Jonakyn didn't let her finish.

"I saw him". She retorted.

She didn't have to think twice before telling her cousin in this matter shed been with her since the beginning and she's too tired to keep everything to herself.

"Who?". Anna asked her confused.

Jonakyn smiled bitterly making her cousin's worried face saddened.

" Oh, what happened then?". Anna asked her softly knowing that any minute she might break down.

She once again smiled bitterly while wiping some tears falling from her eyes before telling what had happened.

~~

" Kulot!". The man called her happily.

Jonakyn felt like she had lost her voice to speak only a small smile and a nod greeting that she had hardly done.

"How are you?". The latter asked him genuinely while happily smiling at her.

She was dumbfounded and wasn't able to reply instead she was just looking at him.

" Kulot? Oh are you uncomfortable with me calling you casually?".He asked worriedly.

She snapped out and shakes her head hastily.

" No, your not". She replied shortly with a smile the latter just exhale exaggeratedly before smiling back at her.

"I Thought you are mad". He replied.

Jonakyn smiled bitterly, isn't he should be the one who has the reason to be mad. He should be lashing out at her right now or at least ignore her like she's nothing but a stranger to him.

It should be him that has the reason to hate her.

" what are you doing?". She suddenly asked making him stop.

"What do you mean?". He retorted looking away opening the coffee he had bought.

Jonakyn looked at him gaping at the person who had been a big part of her life before. He changes a lot.

He looks more serious and manly now 6 feet 9 inches in height wearing tight jeans and a shirt with a black Denim Jacket with a cap.

He looks more amusing than what she remembers before, the person who likes wearing a simple loosed shirt and jeans and the old sneakers that are making him look cute. Unlike now, he looks more serious and not as jolly like how he used to be before.

"You should be lashing out at me". She replied.

He stops drinking and sighed deeply before smiling bitterly.

" why would I be?". He retorted but before she could answer back he spoke again.

" why would I be mad at you?". He added.

" why would I be mad at someone who is too precious to me?". He retorted leaving her dumbfounded.

" You sure still act like how you used to before". He stated bitterly.

" You still think ahead of a scene that hasn't even occur, You still act like your judgments are right and expect things that will happen based on what you had imagined it would be". He retorted looking down.

She didn't dare to utter any words it's not like he's lying because everything that comes out of his mouth is the truth.

"You never believed that it would work but instead your too easy to give up you won't even have the courage to fight for us". He stated calmly even if Jonakyn can see how much hurt he is while saying it word by word.

" it was agonizing losing someone who's been so important right in front of you without having the chance to fight for it".

Jonakyn's tears slowly cascading down her face she knew that one day she would face him but not like this, she didn't expect to see him like this.

She did not want him to be hurt like this, she sure wants him to lash out at her instead of being like this.

She doesn't want to see him hurt like this.

"I'm sorry ". The only words that came out of her lips while silently cursing herself for being an idiot.

"You don't have to". He retorted.

Slowly he lifts his head and wipes his tears away before inhaling a bunch of air to calm himself and turning his gaze to her.

" You don't have to say your sorry or even cry". He stated tenderly before lifting his hands wiping the tears falling from her.

"I'm not mad at you, I'm hurt but I'm not close to being mad or to hate you". He said smiling at her.

"After everything I've been through after our break up, I had realized something". He added.

"Loving you is hard but losing you is painful. I understand that you don't want me anymore and you don't see me as someone you wished to be with but let me". He stopped to wipe the tears cascading down his face.

" Let me stay with you, let me love you still you don't have to reciprocate the feelings but just let me be with you till the time comes my feelings would fade away. Even if only as a friend I won't ask much just let me be with you and have a proper coping without you leaving me behind". Aaron stated.

Jonakyn didn't think twice and hug Aaron tightly if this is what she can do for him she would gladly do so.

"Yes Muks, You're always welcome to be with me". She answered back while hugging him.

She's the worst looking at how it all ended between them she was still so selfish thinking her decisions would do good for everyone but turned out to be making them suffer more.

" Let's finish this I think you still have classes to attend to let's hang out some other time". The latter stated.

They both talked about things again excluding the happening regarding their past but after departing with good goodbyes Jonakyn still don't feel good but she did feel like something heavy had been lifted away from her after seeing him smile at her genuinely again

~~

" I'm the worst am I?". She stated looking at her cousin monotonously.

Her cousin sighed then pat her before hugging her tightly.

"Idiot you've done what you think is right so be responsible for it this time make it right between the two of you". Anna answered back.

" But I've been so bad at making decisions, I'm scared like shit". She retorted burying her face in the hollow of Anna's neck.

"You did but it's not like it will always happen don't be a coward this time you've been too scared ever since might as well take this chance to step up and face your fears". Anna encourages her.

" I know". She responded filling herself up with all the courage she could to start fighting again.