Chapter 30: I Can't Sleep...!

Recently, after what happened to me before, I have a hard time sleeping at night. I will keep feeling disturbing and I was fearful to sleep alone. Every time I want to sleep, I will imagine and remember that incident. I always force myself to forget about that and it makes me not enough sleep at night.

I suddenly remember before that Bella once asks me to meet her when I still feel like that. I decided on that day to meet with her. I took a day off that day and I just only told Lily the truth about where I'm going. I ask her to keep it from Emmanuel.

After all, lately, I and Emmanuel rarely met because he was busy with his work. I just didn't want to disturb him and I decide to tell him later. I make a phone call to Bella first and she agrees to meet me that day.

After a few hours, I already arrived at the hospital. I waiting for her at the cafe near the hospital there. But, suddenly I also met Ariel there. He coming closer toward me and asking what I doing there. I was nervous. Should I tell him or not? But, I'm worried he will tell Emmanuel later.

''Hey, Jordyn!''

''Hi!''

''What are you doing here? Are you sick again? Are you okay?''

''No, I'm just fine. I just have a meeting with someone here.''

''Someone? Who is that?''

''It's me!'' Bella suddenly barges in from behind.

''Oh...it looks like this meeting was between family members. May I know when I can join be in this family meeting?'' Ariel said while giving a teases to Bella. I was looking at them with a puzzle.

''Sorry, you will not in!'' Bella speaks in a cynical tone. I chuckled.

''It looks like I'm still not fit into your standard. It's okay, I will try again later. Enjoy your time. Bye, Jordyn!'' He walks away from there while giving a smile to me and gives a wink to Bella. I just chuckle to see both of them.

Bella just gives a glare at him and her annoying face. I think there must be something between them. I feel pity for Ariel as he really tried his best to attract her intention. ''Um...I think...he likes you!'' I said to Bella while chuckling.

''What? No!''

''He is a good guy. Why you didn't want to give him a chance?''

''Yeah, he is. I just...yeah...I have once broken heart before, so...it hard for me to be in love again.''

''Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to...''

''It's okay. It's already past. Right now, we talk about you. Come, let us take a seat here.''

Then, we take our seats and we going to talk about my problem. After telling her all the matters, I feel relief. Finally, I can tell someone about my trauma.

''Bella, I'm worried that will affect my health. I really can't have a better sleep from that incident until now. Sometimes, I don't know what to do...''

''Don't worry, Jordyn. I understand. It actually your inner feeling that still trauma about the incident. I promise you that I will help you to lose the strain.''

''Did I look like a crazy person?''

She burst into laughter after hearing I said like that. ''Jordyn, did someone ever tell you that you sometimes are a funny person?''

''What do you mean?''

''Never mind, just forget it. As for now, you don't have to worry okay. Actually, it not a big problem. I think you should give your time to relax or give more time to yourself to do something that you like. Like going to vacation, camping or...other things you like to do.''

''Hmm...I wish I can have that free time. I have too much works to do.''

''Did Emmanuel don't even give his employee to take a vacation? He really a strict man when he doing his business. He is really different from him.''

''Different from who?''

''Oh...um...I mean, he really different from our father. Like my father before, he always cares about his employee.''

''Oh, I see. Yeah, he really a cold stone boss and also very strict when he doing his works. Sometimes, when I met him at the office, I can't believe that I date him. He really can be a professional when we on our works.''

''Yeah, you right. He always like that. So, did he know you come here? I mean, about your condition.''

''Um...he doesn't know. He was busy in these few days, so maybe I will tell him later.''

''I think you should tell him too. He may be can help you.''

''I just don't want to burden him...''

''Jordyn...can I say something?''

''Yes, sure.''

''I hope you will not leave Emmanuel whatever he does. And the thing that I sure of about him is, he really sincerely loves you. I know he makes many sacrifices for his life but I hope you will always be by his side.''

I was a little confused by her words. I don't know why she saying that but I believe that he must be worried about her brother. ''Mm...don't worry, I will not leave him.''

''Now I know why he really loves you. I know why he doesn't want to let you go from him. After meeting you and see how much love between both of you...I remember how was that feeling of love. How I wish I will meet with someone like both of you.''

''How about Ariel? Just give him a chance.'' She chuckles. ''I want to...but...I still in fear. Actually, I once almost marry with this man but, at the last moment... he told me that he was not ready yet. He still needs to reconsider again our relationship.'' Bella said in sadness.

''At that moment, I was dumbstruck. He just left me like that on the day of our wedding day. I was really in grief. From that moment...until now, I still can't forget about that and that makes me not be in love again. I'm worried that I will face it again.'' She added.

I was sad to hear her stories. No wonder she looks like a firm girl from outside but inside her heart, she has that sad story. I suddenly feel a little touched by that and I didnt realize that I shed tears there.

''Bella...I feel sad for you.'' My eyes in tears.

She laughs at me when she sees me in tears there. ''Jordyn, don't worry. I feel okay now. I just feel want to share with you my stories. You really a good listener.'' She chuckling.

''If you feel want to have a someone listening with your problem, just call me okay? You make me remember my sister too. We always share our grief stories like this.'' I wipe out my tears.

''Okay, it's a deal!'' She burst into laughter.

///

That night, I was lie down alone in my bedroom. I was thinking a few things there while pensively looking at my ceiling. I take a look at my cell phone and actually I was waiting for him to call me. But, it looks like he still busy.

I force myself to sleep that night but I can't. Then, I go out of my room and went to my sister's room. I slowly knock on her room and she opens it. She startled to see me standing there with my pillow. I just smile at her and barge into her room.

''What happened? You still can't even sleep? Are you already take the medicine?''

I nod and lie down on her bed. ''Still didn't effective?''

''Mm...''

''Just relax your mind, Jessa...''

''Mm...I just want someone to accompany me. I don't want to be alone tonight.''

''Or are you missing someone right now? So you sick from that missing?'' Victoria tried to tease her.

''Sister! I'm not.''

''Oh yeah? I noticed that you always look at your cell phone before. You have to know that he is a businessman. So... it's normal he so busy.''

''I know about that, but he not even call me one time or sends me a message? I was really downhearted...''

Victoria just chuckling to hear her grumble about him. ''If like that, you can make a call to him.''

''No. I dont want to disturb him and I dont want him to think that I was an annoying girlfriend.''

''Okay, whatever. It's your choice. So, let me sing for you tonight. So that you can sleep okay?''

''That's a good idea. I haven't heard you sing for me in a long time.''

''What song do you want to hear?''

''Any song associated with deep longing. I want to mourn my own sadness.''

Victoria burst into laughter after hearing her sister requested a song. She can say that Jordyn was really in a critical mood right now. She just hopes that Emmanuel will give her a call at that time.

No matter what, the thing she needs to do now is singing a song for her little sister. In fact, Victoria really has a nice voice when she singing and she always sings a song for Jordyn when they in childhood before.

After a few minutes, finally, Jordyn fell asleep. Victoria moves closer to her and covers her with a blanket. She gently rubs her hair. Suddenly, Jordyn's cell phone was ringing. It was Emmanuel!