Chapter 3: Return

She had always believed she was hopelessly unhappy, she had never asked herself the question of taking off this weight to get back to breathing. By now she had become accustomed to the feeling of sleep apnea as in reality, so well she hadn't even imagined being able to do without it. Thanks to the path followed up to that moment, she realized that some aspects of her life no longer belonged to her, did not reflect her ego of her ideal of her. She explored her wills, her desires, her long-buried emotions; she had the courage to question everything, maybe she was too sick not to. She discovered for the first time how easy it was for her to face her biggest fears, than to keep repressing them: it was thus, that her greatest fear of not being loved, actually turned into the desire to receive love and every little nuance that this sentiment can offer, in its greatest desire.

Everyone was standing in front of the gate of the monastery to greet Ziva once again, each of them had shared unique moments with her and all had learned to love her in different ways.

Miyagi was still in front of her who continued to give her advice, making her promise to write as soon as she was settled, when suddenly Marleen, an orphaned girl of just over four years, clung to her leg. Ziva knew her well: she was a little girl whom she had helped with school for months, gradually establishing a beautiful friendship despite her tender age. Both had seen the horrors of life, they had lost their family, but somehow they had emerged victorious from that bad experience, even if not unscathed. Ziva had grown so fond of that little girl because she saw a little of herself in her and was unable to be completely objective: in fact, she often quarreled with the governesses who took care of her and said that she was incapable of her. It often happened that Marleen stayed to sleep with Ziva, even against the wishes of her assistants, since it was not good for the child to become so attached to her that sooner or later she would go away. In the morning, when she was late for their meeting, Miyagi, going to her room, found them curled up, one embraced. It had taken months before they both opened, but as soon as they had found their meeting point they had become inseparable.

"Bring me with you!" she said whimpering the little girl not detaching herself from her legs.

Ziva was trembling, she was speechless; although she tried to talk about her no sound came from her lips, she was petrified. Her heart ached and she would have liked not to leave her but only to hold her in her arms, protecting her from the world; what else could she do? She was not her daughter after all, even if that idea of ​​her had crossed her mind several times.

"Honey, I'm sorry but I can't," she replied in a voice that was almost tearful.

"Why not?" she asked innocently.

"It is difficult to explain her but ... you need a family: a mother and a father" she explained with a childlike attitude.

Marleen's eyes immediately took on color and vitality.

"Then it's simple. You can become my mom and…. Tony my dad "she said joyfully and proud to be able to find the solution to the problem, however, this caused only more pain for Ziva, unable to answer her. The little girl had found out about Tony from a photo she kept in her room, hidden behind a thousand other things; once she found her, Ziva could not help but tell her who was that funny and smiling man of hers who had captured her in her arms, tickling her until she cried with joy. She looked up sad and heartbroken, so Miyagi, understanding her signal, immediately rushed to her aid.

"Marleen, my little one, sometimes what we want or want is not always what we can have," she said, making her little face wrinkle and cry Ziva, who had barely managed to restrain herself before.

"I'll never forget you. You will always be my mom "confessed the little girl in Ziva's ear.

"I will never forget you either, little crafty little girl," she replied with a faint smile, ruffling her hair; hugging her and holding her in her arms in a party full of affection.

It was this last memory of her that kept her company for the whole trip back to Washington. She put the suitcases at the entrance and went up in the elevator, that would be the only moment in which she would be alone before being assailed by questions and hugs. Entering the office she found everything empty and was upset: it is true no one knew of her arrival and she did not expect a great ceremony, but she thought she would find them all at work at least.

She was about to leave when she heard, "I can't believe it! Is it really you? " she cried a sweet voice,

calling it to her attention.

"It seems so," she replied nervously, just before being hugged warmly.

"Where are all McGee?"

"Gibbs at home, Ducky and Palmer still down are finishing the work, Abby ... in the lab, and ... Tony at home" said the latter two names, lowering his eyes, embarrassed.

"You're back?"

She didn't answer, she didn't know yet what exactly she was going to do; she was there, this was a starting point.

"I'm going to…"

He interrupts her even before she finished speaking. "They suffered, both of them and did not recover completely. Be understanding, "McGee advised, a piece of advice that sent her into a rage. What did she think, that it had been a walk in the park for her?

She was shocked, she greeted him and walked towards the morgue: first she would go to them and immediately after to Abby, it would not have been easy but certainly more than with Tony. As soon as they saw it they were amazed, they could no longer move: they were surprised and did nothing to keep it from being noticed.

"Welcome back!!" hugging her, Palmer told her fondly.

"Have you come to pay a visit to our corpses?" he asked sweet, albeit slightly cold, Ducky.

"No, but you never know I won't finish it" she replied smiling at him and tense at the same time Ziva.

It was she who took the first step and hugged her, amazed him.

"Welcome back my dear and… .Don't go away again" he revealed to her with feigned anger and tenderness.

She was walking down the corridor to go to the lab, but the closer she got, the more afraid she was and the stronger the urge to escape.

"Make fear your strength" once claimed the master Miyagi and she, taken by this encouragement, entered.

Abby didn't notice her coming until she turned around and the test tube she held in her hands shattered into a thousand pieces, spilling its contents onto the floor.

"Where have you gone? I had McGee look for you, but he couldn't find you and that's what to say, since he's the best. What did you think you were doing? Disappear like this, thinking that no one would notice your absence? " she railed all in one breath about Ziva without even giving her time to explain.

"And then Tony also disappeared, but at least he was able to contact him. When he came back he was strange: I knew something was wrong and in fact in the end he confessed everything to me ".

Ziva rolled her eyes, she didn't understand why she was so furious despite everything; after all, she should have understood.

"Do you think it would have been enough for me to know you were doing it for Gibbs?" she asked her annoyed, finally clearing up her voice after that long ranting she spoke uncertainly: "I thought ...."

Interrupting her, she Abby spoke again in bursts: "Did you believe what? You turned our lives upside down, especially mine, and then you left without even looking back or saying a word, without giving us any news. But do you know how worried you made me? " she affirmed by patting her arm just before hugging her so tightly that it crushed her. They remained in that position, tight for several minutes: both needed that embrace, that return to origins: in a nutshell, they both needed each other. Abby pulled away only a few inches and keeping his gaze on her face, asked that question of her who knew how to weigh her like a boulder.

"Have you already seen it?"

"No, I was the first to come here because… I thought I would find you all".

"We are like sisters, but I also love Tony. Be careful with him because he has suffered so much since you left, he tried not to show it but you know Tony: something inside him had changed. Please don't hurt him, "Abby announced protectively.

"I'm sorry, but what do you think, that it was easy for me? I too have suffered. I worked on myself reliving moments from my past that I just wanted to erase, I missed each of you so much that I wanted to leave everything and come back; but you know what? I couldn't do it. I owed it to myself, to Gibbs and to Tony. Each time I thought I was closer, I was one step further away; it was a long and heavy journey physically and emotionally .... so please don't tell me not to make him suffer, because he was not the only one "reiterated an angry and disappointed Ziva, because no one had been able to understand her? She knew well that everyone had suffered; she, maybe she should have written, but this in some way would have distracted her: it was a journey that she had to travel alone. Ziva didn't stay with Abby long, but before she left she had to promise to tell her everything; now came the hardest part of her: talking to Tony and Gibbs.

"I want to hear his voice and not be afraid. All I've ever known is how to hide a secret, but I'm tired of moving on without believing it. Every day I get closer and closer to the conclusion that I am not bulletproof, I realized that I have something to lose: it is you. I thought I would go on, but I can't think of anything else: I keep hearing you everywhere, I can't forget what I saw on your face, I know every little detail ".

Ziva was so absorbed in reflections to herself that she didn't realize she had already arrived at Tony's house, when she suddenly stopped; what she saw of her froze her heart: there are things that, unfortunately, despite everything, they never go back to the way they used to, they inevitably change.

And it hurts, damn bad to trust and be betrayed.

She stood in the car for about ten minutes watching the scene unfold under her eyes from a distance. Tony was hugging a beautiful woman - who obviously wasn't her - and he didn't stop laughing like he'd never seen her before. The woman, unknown to her, had shoulder-length honey blonde hair, she wore casual but very feminine clothes that stood out her forms, without being vulgar; everything told her that he had turned the page of her by choosing another woman completely different from her.

Sometimes things turn out too late:

it turns out late to love,

it turns out late to be loved,

it turns out late to be betrayed;

Sometimes it's too late to find out that loving hurts.

Her pain was immense, she could not even explain what was happening inside her, she was completely destroyed: and then as he wiped the tears on her face he remembered her teacher and her wise words.

"Remember, the soul sees what escapes the eyes".

She kept repeating those phrases to herself to give herself the necessary strength, but she couldn't come to terms with it: her pain was too strong, perhaps the only person who could help her was him, Gibbs. Arriving in front of her house she was nervous and tense, her hands were shaking and she was afraid; she then she reminded herself that he would understand her. The whole house was dark, but she knew where to find him; in fact, the light in the basement was on. Ziva padded down the stairs, very slowly and as soon as she opened the door she found him right in front of her. Her astonishment was so much that the hammer she held in her hands fell to the ground, breaking the silence that had been created.

"Hey Ziver!" in the end he was the first to speak of her, waving her in and giving her one of her rare smiles.

"Er… hey boss" she replied very shyly; the look of her that he gave her was so tender that as soon as she went down the last step she ran into her arms.

Gibbs didn't show much of his feelings, just like Ziva, although in some moments he seemed like another person, like in that instant. That hug contained many questions, fears and a lot of affection: that gesture was just for them. He moved away, resuming her position near the work table and with his eyes down on her wood he said to her: "Boss? Does that mean you're back? "

After a few minutes of silence he spoke that she could never lie to him.

"I still don't know what I'll do," she admitted; at her statement he looked up at her face.

"It depends on how it goes," she added almost thoughtfully.

"Didn't Tony tell you anything?" she asked shyly.

"What was he supposed to tell me?" he asked her back in a not very calm tone. She didn't answer she had already said too much and she didn't want to get him into trouble any more than, perhaps, she wasn't already. What could she say then?

"You know well that I discover everything sooner or later, therefore, it is not always necessary to talk to me" she said raising an eyebrow and smiling.

"I don't know what happened between you and I don't even want to know, but I understood that you had something to do with it. Tony had changed after his trip, so I assumed that .... "

"That I was the one who hurt him, that once again I destroyed what was good I had, right?" she replies angrily.

"I didn't say that," Gibbs immediately defended himself with a shrug.

"But what do you all have today?" she said abruptly, rising mechanically from the chair which fell causing a noise that radiated throughout the room. Gibbs gave her a dirty look that she took no interest in, so much so that she continued to speak angry and hurt.

"Since I arrived, everyone has done nothing but repeat to me the suffering I caused: do they really make me so selfish?" she asked in an altered tone of voice, never used before, at least not with him.

"But what did you expect?" he replied annoyed by that accusation of her Gibbs, making her feel stunned and hurt more than she let on.

"I just thought you would understand me, after all I did it for you and ... for Tony" she confided with tears in her eyes.

As soon as he finished telling him the whole truth, he stroked her shoulder with affection and protection, as after all he had always been with her. She ziva had said more than she wanted to tell him, but she didn't want to do otherwise, at least he had to understand.

"What do you want to do with him?" he asked her, astonishing her.

"I don't know" she admitted defeated, but the knowing look that the two changed was worth a thousand words: he believed in her and that was enough.

"I saw him with a woman" she blurted out in a wounded breath.

Gibbs gave an amused smile, yet the cold look she sent him made him recomposed. Gibbs' rules were strict and were not to be broken, any of them; among these one stood out, number 12 or no relationship between colleagues; would he have made an exception for them? The answer was not to be sought except in his eyes. He would have done it, perhaps because the love between Tony and Ziva was so strong and pure that it reminded him so much of that between him and her wife; a love beyond the borders of the world. Seeing Ziva's state of mind, he couldn't help but feel sad for her, even though at the same time he refrained from laughing at her, for how she had interpreted her situation.

"You need to talk to Tony. It's not what it seems, "he said determinedly and in a loud voice, a sign that the conversation was closed.

Ziva stayed a few more hours with him, knowing that her sleep would be long in coming.

"Catch the moment.

Everything we fear is what we want most.

Don't hide behind a facade, be yourself and show your true essence ".

These were the words that rang in her mind and said good morning to her, just like that morning when Miyagi said it to her.

Tony had his routine: his day began with a nice morning run that filled his lungs with fresh air and tried to soothe his aching heart, the latter with poor results. Everything else happened so quickly that it was worthless: home, shower, office, home again, bed; his energy was directed to the morning, that part of the day, the only one, that made him feel alive. Ziva had started walking through the park among trees and people who she ran, until she pushed her steps of love she found herself in that place, in their magical place where everything was possible.

That place had a different meaning for each of them. For him it was the place where she had taken her first photograph of her - unbeknownst to her - of her that she now jealously kept in her wallet. In that photo you could see a different Ziva: happy, carefree and with something that she had made him fall in love with, even if it wasn't love yet. For her, however, that place represented the first time she had expressed her feelings: one day about her to Shemil, her great and old friend, she was able to confide in him that Tony was the man she loved; he was the first and only one to whom she said it. That place, seen from afar, was simple and gave no feeling of magic: it consisted of a bench between two oak trees, with a view of green meadows, where with a little luck, it was possible to glimpse some daisies; the magic was due to the fact that for them, that place represented the beginning of their love.

He surprised her from behind and we just missed her not knocking him down. Tony had not yet learned, never go behind an agent trained to kill, especially if that agent is capable of killing you in 100 different ways. It was an afternoon when they both had their day off from work and by a strange chance they both found themselves in the same place. It was destiny? Who knows ...

"What are you doing here?" Tony asked, amused, making fun of her.

"And you, what are you doing?" she retorted annoyed.

"Don't you have some new conquests to pamper?" she mocked him sarcastically.

"No, for me only you exist," he said nonchalantly, even though, soon after, he understood what he had admitted aloud.

They looked into each other's eyes, distracted by what they felt, even if they couldn't understand what it was; there was something strange, a mixture of sweetness, fear and embarrassment.

"What did you say?" he could barely mumble, still in shock at her revelation.

"Don't ask questions you're not sure you want an answer to." With a serious wink she said.

Suddenly her hands began to sweat, her heartbeat accelerated taking an egg rhythm, her head began to spin, he did not understand anything if ... except that he was there with her.

It was as if the bench under them no longer existed, as if they were not surrounded by anything else, except their smiles capable of illuminating the atmosphere that enveloped them. She could not control herself, no more, it was as if her body and mind were detached from each other. Her smile slowly faded, her lips brushed against hers and she felt like she had never been before her; she thought and she wondered if she really wanted it, she was assailed by a thousand doubts, until she felt her heartbeat go in sync with his own.

"Yes, I really want to know," she reiterated, this time more sure of herself.

He looked at her making her feel the most important woman than her, she gave him all the power of her with the knowledge that it was him: the man she loved about her.

And as in a flutter of wings she whispered to her: "I love you", brushing her lips again, making that moment unique and magical.

"I love you too" she confessed shyly and nervously shortly after.

When she felt her hand brush against her flushed cheek, her doubts vanished, she closed her eyes and let her senses carry her. It was an eternal kiss, a little moment of eternity when the world out there had taken on another color, a world where anything was possible.

That memory gave her the strength to get even closer to a man sitting on the bench who had somehow usurped their magical place. She just needed to get a little closer to recognize him: short brown hair, broad shoulders, office posture and hopelessly a steaming cup of coffee in her hands.

"Do not prevent fear from preventing you from loving".

And so she suddenly remembered that phrase that master Miyagi said to her once when she told him about Tony.

With a cautious step, she slowly approached him who was from behind and could not see her. Her heart was pounding, but she had to do it; she put a hand on her shoulder and found herself surrounded by that familiar warmth that had been missing until that moment. There was no need for words, he knew.

"Ziva," she said in a whisper on her lips, causing her heartbeat to speed up even more. She had not forgotten it.

Ziva approached him until they were facing each other, worried and happy for what was happening inside them and ecstatic for the wonder that surrounded them. As soon as she sat down next to her the atmosphere warmed up, a mixture of emotions was perceived: anger, pain, sadness and joy. She was real, she wasn't the fruit of a dream. The silence that reigned scared even them, no one spoke: there were so many things that they were terrified of. Where to start and where to get there?

"Tony" in a faint whisper Ziva said.

"What are you doing here?" he asked in surprise, as soon as he recovered from his astonishment.

"I'm here for you!"

Those words echoed in the air as well as in his mind, so intensely that minutes passed before he spoke again.

"Safety?" he asked, unconvinced of her statement.

That question left Ziva perplexed and she didn't hide it.

"Yes, Tony, that's it," she said determinedly.

"What do you want?" she said suddenly, in a detached way.

"You. Is it so difficult to understand? " she snorted a little irritated.

"Yes, since you are gone" in return he replied.

"You know I had to do it."

"I know".

"And so why…."

"For what? Do you come back here after a year and expect something from me? " he replied, annoyed.

"I do not expect anything, but certainly not such a welcome, not this" he said, looking up and meeting her.

"So what do you want from me, Ziva?" he demanded again, as he got up from that bench which now seemed to represent only a great burden.

With a lightning bolt she took her wrist and pulled it, turning it towards her: she would not have gone as he would have liked.

"Don't you dare to turn your back on me, Antony DiNozzo" she said in a threatening but sweet way at the same time, she only called him by her full name when she was angry or he had made one of hers.

"We have to talk, you can't leave !!".

"Because I can not? You've already done it, "he said, angry and hurt.

"Do we always return to the same discourse?"

"Yes, why shouldn't we?"

"I explained to you then and I told you now too; I had to do it. You know it well".

One was lost in the eyes of the other, they had felt so much pain that they could not find that part of light within themselves to speak and admit the truth.

"I had to find myself again because I no longer knew who I was. I had lost so many things and people that in the end I had also lost myself: that innocent Ziva David, with dreams, with hopes and who still believed in something "she confessed almost to tears as he couldn't understand her.

They had always been in tune, one anticipating the other's moves, yet it is possible that now they could not have a conversation without accusing each other.

"I thought you understood me," she barely whispered.

"I understand you, but that doesn't mean I accepted it," he replied, approaching her.

"So what then? It's over?" she asked, no longer having the strength to fight.

"It never started" Tony reiterated with a harsh tone who knew very well that those words would hurt her, however he had a void inside, which by now he could not fill, like a man without emotions.

Since she was gone, even a part of him was gone, he was no longer the same Tony DiNozzo. He had turned his back as if to want to get away from that place full of painful memories; despite this he lacked the courage to really do it.

"I thought you had more balls! You have always fought for what you believed, you have risked your life several times and now what are you doing? Are you running away? You are a coward! This isn't the Tony I know, "she yelled at her behind her.

She was so angry that she said things that she would not have wanted, but as soon as she opened her mouth she could no longer control herself; her words began to come out so fast they couldn't stop them.

"In fact, you don't know me, at least not anymore" he answered turning and glaring at her.

"So talk, come here, sit by my side and make yourself known. Don't run away. "Ziva suggested very tenderly, intimidated by how the situation was escalating.

"Are you sure what you are asking? Are you sure you won't run away again at the slightest difficulty or when things get more serious? " Tony asked sternly before giving her the power to destroy him once again.

"I can't make any promises but I'm here Tony, I'm not running away: this should already be a start".

"Ever since I took that damn plane, I've lost a part of me that made me alive. The days went by so quickly that I didn't even realize: work seemed to have become a burden "he confessed, keeping his eyes down, unable to support his own look, he was so bad.

"You took away every shred of my life, made me insignificant even incapable of the job where I was the best before: you made me who I never wanted to be. You destroyed me! " Tony said in a strong, hard voice that scared her.

Those words spoken with that load of accusations, of pain began to weigh on her so much that she questioned everything once again. Was it possible that she was wrong?

"Fight for what you love,

don't be intimidated

from those who know how things are or what they want,

it's them

the first to have suffered and the last to admit it.

Fight for what you want,

fight above all for something that is yours. "

Taken by her despair, these words that Miyagi had written her in a farewell note flashed into her mind. It was like a flash everything made sense again, she knew what she wanted and what she would have, after all she was Ziva David and, even if the journey had changed her, she knew how to take what she belonged to her.

"You talk about how I destroyed you, but do you think it was my fault alone?" she said, raising her voice to the point of immediately drawing Tony's attention to herself.

"It could also have been my fault, but the difficulties are faced in two, for better or for worse, so don't tell me how things are because I know it well: That morning, many years ago, right here on this bench, we confessed to ourselves that he loves each other, even though we have decided not to go on for our own good and for our career; please note, however, there were two of us that day "she specified, treading on the last words.

Tony looked up at her, and perhaps, for the first time, that light that had gone out was rekindled in him: he was amazed, however, to see, in her eyes, a fire burning like he had never seen mine before. That look so determined and sure shocked him to the point that he had a tangle of meaningless sentences in his head. She continued undaunted: by now she "had started at full throttle" and she would not have stopped; no, certainly not now.

"I'm sorry for what you went through, but do you think it was easy for me? I made a tiring and long journey to find myself, that person I was so proud of in the past and I assure you that I went through everything to do so. I can't even explain what I experienced: it was strong enough to unfold, I analyzed and relived every phase of my life emotionally and physically. I questioned everything: things I believed in and people I trusted. I struggled for days not to let out all the pain I felt, but you know what? I had to do it, I had to admit everything, even if it would initially cause me pain then it would help me heal. I found myself faced with facts and events that I wanted to erase from my mind and my life. You suffered, I don't doubt it, but it was the same for me. Both how many times have you hurt me unconsciously? Yet I let you do it because I loved you so much that I endured the suffering you caused me; a pain that, compared to what I felt for you, was a drop in an ocean. " She said with all the anger, pain and sweetness she had inside.

He could not even speak because she had taken over the reins of the situation: adding more seemed superfluous.

"If I hurt and hurt you so much, as you claim, why haven't you forgotten me?" she asked through gritted teeth, managing to throw the words out with strength and pain at the same time.

"I wanted to do it, I tried, but ... I couldn't," he admitted looking into her eyes. It was only then that they realized they were holding hands; they parted immediately and embarrassed by the brief contact, they lowered their eyes: silence fell, at least for a couple of minutes.

"It was something I had to do and I had to do it alone," Ziva reiterated once again with a lot of tenderness and determination.

"I know, you had to do it for him," Tony replied softly, but a little annoyed.

She couldn't figure out who he was referring to, only later did she understand.

"You… you are angry because I did this for Gibbs!" she said smiling Ziva receiving a not very nice look from Tony.

"I…"

"" You did not understand anything as usual. It's true I did it for Gibbs, but also for you! " she revealed to him, at those words he looked up at her face and vice of her that she was sincere.

"Gibbs gave me so much, I was and will always be in duty with him, but you ... you took the most important part of me: my heart," she stated embarrassed that manifested itself through the redness of her cheeks.

He approached her with a shrewd step, he had to seize that opportunity of her: when he was close to her he passed a delicate hand over her face and with her other he attracted her to him possessively. They were so close that a breath would have been enough for his lips to touch hers; that breath didn't come and all she felt was a storm wind, once again.

She broke free from her embrace, she was falling for it again: he and his being so wonderful; no, she wasn't supposed to be like that.

That gesture confused Tony who wondered what he had said or done wrong this time; his answers did not fail to arrive.

"I keep thinking about what I saw and I can't understand after all," she said almost to herself, making her face wrinkle.

"What are you referring to?" Tony asked very cautiously, he didn't know why, but he knew he had to act like that.

"You say you have suffered so much and yet you have no qualms about turning the page, going on with your life as a sex symbol and then accusing me of having ruined everything"

"That's not true," he defended himself.

Ziva's expression did not allow for replies, he was not an employee or a simple delivery guy, he was Tony DiNozzo and he would not have been so blamed for something he had not done.

"Why should I lie?"

"To defend your position, your macho being and then because it's me and not just anybody and you like to contradict me, always!" she winked.

"As usual you talk and you understand each other"

"Tony, do you also want to deny the evidence? I saw you with my own eyes! Yesterday I went to your house because I didn't find you in the office and ... "

She was interrupted by his laughter: now all the pieces were starting to fit together; however that gesture did nothing but anger her by punching him in her arm. He automatically ran his hand down the aching part of her arm to relieve the pain, but she Ziva didn't go down lightly.

"It's not what it looks like," she laughed, finally, she stated.

She glared at him and Tony immediately ran for cover explaining the situation, so as to clarify everything, just in time to escape the "urge-Ziva".

"It's not what you think! This is Ellie, the new agent who took your poto. We are friends and nothing else "he added immediately, before receiving another punch.

He already knew what she was going to say so he anticipated it.

"She was beside Me, she understood how I felt, she didn't ask me questions and she left me alone when I needed it. She is married, happily married I also add and as I have already told you we are only very good friends "

A little later in a whisper she said, "And anyway, in any case, it's you who left."

Regardless of her subtlety in saying what she wanted, she continued to explain.

"The last few months have been the heaviest because I knew I was so close that I could go home that I wasn't always able to do what I was asked, I was distracted. This year was as enlightening as it was painful and devastating ... it was a challenge, but the past is over, "she said smiling.

"Really?" Tony asked surprised and amused at the same time.

"Yes".

Both of them suddenly looked up straight into each other's eyes: her face was dangerously close to hers, her lips were eager to meet, but the time had not yet come. A thousand questions flowed in Tony's eyes: about them, about their future, about what united them once again; Ziva wanted to stare into those eyes of hers for the rest of her life, until… her sudden gesture of hers. Nothing mattered anymore, there were no questions to answer, there were only Tony and Ziva: that was their moment. Her soft lips rested on hers; a feeling of peace interrupted by the delicate touch of her hand on her face and her hands in her hair, not to let go. A moment, a moment, a clash between their languages; they sought each other, they chased each other until union, until the perfection of that feeling that does not know neither place nor time .. Passion, desire, transport: a moment in which the intensity that surrounded them was at deep levels, so much that hope it would never end.

"Why did you do that?" suddenly asked, dazed, Ziva.

"Wasn't I supposed to?" Tony answered amused.

"I don't think you were so sorry," he said sarcastically. Yes, now you recognized him: the Tony DiNozzo that everyone knew was returning.

"You make me be like this ...."

"Thing? Crazy, awesome or super sexy? He jokingly retorted, drawing her to him and kissing her again. She laughed like she hadn't done in a long time, when those smiles were aimed only at him.

"I still don't think all this is possible"

"I can't live without you: you should know this since I told you so many years ago, even if in bad circumstances" he told her and with a delicate and sweet touch he kissed the tip of her nose.

"I know I have to tell you" and at those words Tony's face darkened: perhaps for the first time he was afraid that that dream was about to end; the look of love that she gave her was ... enlightening.

"I love you," Ziva announced softly, so close to her lips that he could almost touch them.

He didn't answer and she began to worry. However, as soon as she noticed her glint in her eyes she knew it was the same for him too; a moment later, in fact….

"I love you too my little ninja".

They were looking for each other,

they were lost,

they had found each other,

their world together began now.

Sometimes love just needs an extra push,

of a chance encounter,

in any place,

with two special people.

Author's space:

Here I am again to update the third and penultimate chapter.

I don't know what to say about the story because I think it speaks for itself XD. This part is fully dedicated to the return of Ziva and the reaction of the team, what do you think? Did I manage to get a little closer to their true characters like in the series? I hope so, let's say it was not easy to write this chapter, there is no easy part, because I was trying to be as similar as possible to the series. The most difficult part of all was between Tony and Ziva, I know, I was bad, but I couldn't write otherwise in the end it was still a year ago ..... don't hate me =). Thanks always go first of all to my cousin Viviana for helping me in the development of the story by enriching it, then I thank my sister for helping me in some moments of uncertainty and finally, no less important I thank two unique friends;) Alice (on EFP life before his eyes) which this time was truly unique: I had a moment of crisis I had to write the scene of Tony and Ziva on the bench that of the flashback and I was stuck and she was very helpful to me and so thank you. Then I also thank Lucrezia (on EFP _Fire) who supported me when I believed that the story was not who knows what, she made me think again with her sweet words, then said by a person who does not look at Ncis and who started shipping Tiva only after, so for me it has even more value. Finally, my thanks go to you who continue to follow me, who read my stories and who cannot do without Tivas just like me. If you go, leave a negative or positive review that will always be welcome =)