New leaf, my lord...1 universe

Chapter 27

“ don’t you think it’s time that you let go I mean if you really did not want to be with this woman why the heck did you have so many children with her?” I ask packing up my bags.

“that’s real comforting you know, ” he says rolling his eyes

“Did you come here to cry over your ex-wife or help me prepare for rehab, ” I retort sarcastically?

Serves him right for being an adulter I mean this is life showing him that he should be patient and not take things for granted, doesn’t seem to ring a bell in his head yet. Not that im perfect of course I just got married and am already getting threatened by divorce. This is scary, I mean I just started with this whole husband thing not to mention her being the first woman ive actually been with since I was young. It's a difficult thing to believe but all my life was spent studying and focusing on building my company. I became a donkey as people would say always grinding my teeth at the thought of settling down, here and there I had a few women who tried to get my attention but like they say donkeys don’t see what's around them sometimes.

I want to be good enough though, I mean…don’t we all want to?

“get over it, I have to leave now. See you in 3 months maybe, I don’t know depends on my progress.” I say heading towards the fabric company

He closes the trunk before driving off, I could only imagine what the next few months would be like and hopefully it’s not being tired up the entire day in a dark and gloomy room, I heard it’s actually peaceful and calming…its time that I address the issues I’ve been hoarding inside for a while now. I walked in, the first thing I had taken away was my cell phone…I don’t know what that has to do with the situation but all I know is that I felt anxious whenever I was away from it. After unpacking and given only books to entertain myself, I found an old kitaab in the pile…it was beyond recognition. The last time I remember caring about religion was never. The area did have a rehabilitation section for Muslims specifically, the kitaab was the exact same one I tossed into my bag as a kid angrily banging the door on my way out to the madrasa. I’m starting to question my behaviour.

I began flipping through its pages, skimming through it. Basic etiquette and stuff, do's and don’t's of a Muslim. I don’t think I understood half of what was written inside but as I came across this beautiful hadeeth I knew something moved inside of me. Something Zhareefah use to say every time she came over looking drained and overworked.

“When Allah loves a servant he tests him…” simple yet subtle…why was I feeling this aching in my chest upon reading those words.