Chapter 4

Mei Xiang is sitting on a chair in Gin's room. Its uncomfortable and it hurts. She keeps shifting finding a comfortable position before squinting her eyes at the brightness of the room.

It's still early in morning.

She had no plans ending up here but she had been coming down from an exceptional high when she felt herself being picked up, with her mind hazy she failed to notice the man following her.

She had no choice other than willingly being led to his house. She would have to suffer whatever asinine conversation the man is willing to have with her.

Gin is sitting on a chair across from her. He is been looking at her and Mei Xiang hates it. If he wasn't her mediator, she would have already killed him. Gin isn't saying anything, Mei Xiang hates when he does that. God knows what he is thinking, what conclusions he came to. He judging her.

"Is everything okay Mika?"

Mika....her name. When was the last time she heard that name. She had forgotten it. The only memory she had of her family was that name. Years of being in this field, she had assumed many names, many personalities. She had long forgotten her name.

Somehow when Gin asks it's feels so much worse. What a stupid question to ask. Nobody is alright, it's humanely impossible.

Gin knows this.

He is not stupid.......well most of the times he is not.

It's just a way to get what he wants to know.

Gin can probably tell that Mei Xiang is high and has been recently, with how her fingers are twitching. Her erratic breathing, her dilated irises. The way her eyes are unfocused.

She could go on.

Mei Xiang is sure that Gin knows all the signs that his acquaintance is not alright. They have known each other for many years.

So Mei Xiang just decides to answer,

"I am fine."

She is tired and knows the direction where this conversation will be going.

Gin sighs and rolls his eyes. He stands and gets something from the kitchen. Gin returns, gives Mei Xiang a glass leaving a short kiss on her lips before sitting down.

Mei Xiang scoffs, feeling a small victory that she had stopped the so called interrogation.

"I haven't seen you in weeks," Gin raises his hands and crosses it, "The air isn't as it was."

Mei Xiang sobers up at this.

"And when I do see you," Gin sighs, he seems to do that whenever he and Mei Xiang find themselves in a room together, "You disappear from the party."

"Maybe it was intentional," Mei Xiang drawls.

Gin looks at Mei Xiang, a flash of annoyance graces his handsome face.

"I worry about you," Gin says, "constantly."

"I didn't ask you to," Mei Xiang knows this is harsh. She and Gin have known each other since they were children, before all of this, when she was Mika. She knows Gin feels responsible for what happened. He blames himself for being late, maybe that's why he didn't stop her usage of drugs because he thought it was a way for her to cope. He wasn't wrong, but he isn't correct either.

"My people have told me that you have been seeing someone."

Of course, if anyone knew about Su Nian it had to be Gin.

"What are you thinking? You might be discovered," Gin tries again.

She knows, her dealings with Su Nian was dangerous. He was an official while they were drug dealers. However she couldn't stop herself, was it her fault? Getting addicted to a married man although she knows at the end the one who will be left is her?

"Whatever I do does not concern you." Mei Xiang is not in a mood for this. She knows Su Nian's operation led to one of her suppliers getting caught. She was looking for a new supplier when she ran into Su Nian at the party. She was trying to find the contact but in the end it all turned out to be a waste of time.

Well.....not entirely....if she closes her eyes she can still feel Su Nian's lips on her. The predatory bite that drew blood from her lips. Su Nian's eyes as she rode him.

Su Nian's.......

Su Nian.

Mei Xiang shakes her head to rid her of the memories of that night but it fails terribly.

Gin continues talking,

"You have been leaving your mark in every brothel room. A signature that can lead to your arrest."

Mei Xiang gives Gin a smile, it is not returned.

Mei Xiang knows she is getting careless. Su Nian is investigating the drug road, she is one of the people traveling on that road. Su Nian has been getting close and Mei Xiang knows she has to stop him.

Suddenly there is a smoking pipe on the table. Gin must have placed it. Mei Xiang didn't see him placing it. It's the same smoking pipe.

"Isn't this yours?" Gin asks. "My people have been collecting this from every brothel room you spent with Su Nian. Once would have been understandable but six times?! Are you giving him evidence?!"

Mei Xiang shivers and looks down. This is scaring her, Gin is scaring her. She is reminded of the past. The screams echo in her ears and she finds herself unable to breath. She faintly feels someone shaking her shoulders, calling out her name.

"...ka," what was that. More scream echoes and she whimpers, "Mika!!" Gin snaps her out and she looks at him, her eyes red, filled with unshed tears. She can see the look of shock on Gin's face before guilt replaces it. He holds her against his chest, muttering softly in her ears," I am sorry. I am sorry Mika"

Mei Xiang shivers and tries to remove herself from the embrace. It feels suffocating. She feels caged. It's not a good feeling however she forces her body to relax and she finds herself melting into the warmth. This is usually what happens when she is coming down from a nightmare but she wasn't dreaming, she could see that day vividly. Her mind can be scattered and fragmented and sometimes he misses parts but that day. That day. She remembers it very clearly. She wishes to forget.

She thinks of Su Nian. He always tries to look inconspicuous and fails miserably. She had always wondered how his wife doesn't know of his affair with her. The man can't act. He is not good at pretending or lying....

He is so open and honest.....

Maybe it's because she is a liar and an actor that she can point those who are lying. She is very good at detecting lies and deceit.

Gin is good at reading people. Gin is good at reading her. He knows what's in her heart. Mei Xiang thinks it's because he knew her when she was Mika. Because he was there during her down spiral. He didn't stop her, he had encouraged it.

Mei Xiang feels herself being carried and put down on a bed. Gin's bed. Mei Xiang knows that it's only temporary before Gin takes control of her life. Gin likes being in control, he likes knowing everything. Mei Xiang is like that herself. She likes being in control, she likes knowing that someone's life in her hands. Maybe that's the reason why being with Su Nian feels sinful, because she controls him. She controls his guilt. There have been many 'Su Nians' in her life. Men who just want to take from her and not giving anything back to her.

Mei Xiang knows that she is vulnerable. She knows that Gin knows that. Knows that even though she controls Su Nian guilt, she unknowingly gave him her heart. She has no reason to believe that this isn't the reason why she can't ever say no.

Because Su Nian is different.

It feels different with him.

This wanting.....

This urge.....

She probably means nothing to Su Nian.

She is playing a dangerous game and she knows it. She is treading dangerous waters, one that if she is not careful in, she is going to drown.

Su Nian doesn't know about her habits.

He can never know

With the knowing comes the leaving.

She isn't proud of who she was.

Who she is.

She wonders who between Su Nian and her is the siren. Who is luring who?

*********************************

Su Nian was late.

Mei Xiang had been waiting for him in the dark room of the brothel. A smoking pipe in her hand. She will wait for a while before she leaves.

The light from the smoking pipe is dimming when she hears footsteps. A dangerous light appears in Mei Xiang before dispersing when she hears the familiar sequence of knocking. When she opens the door, sure enough there he is.

Su Nian.

Her heart calms down. Su Nian gives her an apologetic smile before closing the door behind him.

"You are late," Mei Xiang states.

"Sorry....it just.....it's just my wife."

Mei Xiang chest tightens. She silences him with a kiss. She doesn't want to know about Su Nian's wife

She doesn't want to think about those things.

She doesn't want to think at all.

Her mind has been jumbled up these few days.

Maybe it's because of Gin.

What he said to her.

She feels unworthy....unclean, dirty

Her hand makes its way on Su Nian's neck giving it a gentle squeeze. She needs to be control. She needs to escape from her thoughts, Su Nian's moans sounds like a song. A song just for her. A song that allows her to see colours. She doesn't know what she is doing but she can't stop.

She has fallen into a trap.

Lured in.

Caught.

Thrown into torturous sea on a collision course with disappointments and betrayal.

Mei Xiang squeezes Su Nian's neck with a little bit more. The shivering body underneath her anchors her from her thoughts. The pulse underneath her palms gives her a little power, squeeze hard enough and the man under her will be no more.

She can't trust this man.

No matter how lovely he is.

Even the devil was once an angel.

There are colours in her eyes, but she is drowning.

But she will not go down alone, if she is falling Su Nian has to drown right along with her.

She has sewn a web of lust and lies just for Su Nian.

Oh Siren sing, she thinks, Sing to me

Sing to me and let's see whose song wins.

In this deadly game, Mei Xiang knows that there can only be one victor.