Thirty-Five

"What would you like to drink, Jeongwoo Hyung?" Mingyu asked as he got up from his seat at the table around which S.T.A.Y was having a meeting.

"Coffee's fine." I replied and gave him a smile. "Thanks"

"No problem. Jaehyeon Hyung?" Mingyu looked at Jaehyeon who was sitting beside me.

"Something sweet." Jaehyeon replied.

"Okay." Mingyu nodded and listed out all four of our requests before leaving the meeting room to go to the vending machine.

I sighed and massaged my temples. I had a nasty headache.

"Jeongwoo, are you okay?" Hanseol enquired.

"Mm. It's just a headache. It'll go away." I dismissed his concern and sat forward, looking at the paper before me that I had scribbled on. "This is coming together nicely though."

"I'm liking the concept too." Jaehyeon smiled and stretched. "We shoot the MV at the beach, for the title track. We should have another evening like that one at Thailand."

"Uwah… That feels so long ago!" Yeojun drawled.

"Mm. That was fun." Hanseol nodded. "If only we could get longer this time. It would be nice to camp out."

Silence fell as all of us seemed to lapse into thought following that statement of his. Somehow, it had gotten all of us to ponder over it.

"Oh!" Yeojun stood up suddenly. "Let's have a camp!"

I laughed. "Hanseol-ah, you might just have led us somewhere with that."

"A camp would be amazing." Jaehyeon agreed. "We can shoot the MV while we're there. Let's say… a week or two's stay there? And we can have our own beach adventures series with tasks and missions along with camp-like fun. If we're planning a summer release, this will be perfect."

The concept that we were going for was related to the ocean. We were thinking along the lines of sailors fighting the current to survive and overcoming the struggles on deck. That was just a general idea though. Even while discussing with the team, we had decided to keep it flexible. Five young men living by the sea would work too. We had just wanted to keep the ocean with us for this one. We owed that entirely to Thailand. "The name that Mingyu had suggested would be nice then, for the album. That English name. What was it?" I looked at Jaehyeon.

"All hands on deck?" He asked.

"Yes. That one. The beach adventure series can also be called 'All Hands on Deck'. First, we'll release the album itself and the MV. A week after that, we can release the series at maybe one episode per week. Tasks, missions, bloopers and even the preparations for the MV shooting. The behind-the-scenes stuff too. The idea is 'All Hands on Deck'. That means teamwork. The whole thing will fit in together nicely."

"Sounds like a plan to me." Hanseol smiled.

Just then, Mingyu entered the room carrying all our drinks rather precariously. He noticed out triumphant faces as he handed us our drinks and asked. "What did I miss?"

"We finalised the plan of action for our next album." Yeojun beamed.

"What? Already? Without me?" He asked, aghast.

"Sit down. We'll tell you." Yeojun motioned to Mingyu's chair. When we were half-way through explaining it all to Mingyu, my phone started ringing. I was reluctant to even look at who was calling because Changmin had been trying to reach me through the past 2 days. He had been calling and messaging me so much that any notification sound on my phone or my ringtone simply made me want to cry. It was ironic how I was loathing the idea of going back to our normal routine but now I wasn't even talking to him at all. I wanted to talk to him though. It was painful for me to do this. However, if I did answer his call, what would I say? What explanation would we give each other? If we could just pretend that the kiss did not happen and go back to how we used to be, it would have been better.

But he wanted to talk about it.

He would not want to pretend that he did not kiss me. He would not pretend that I did not reciprocate. Honestly, even I did not want to pretend. The fact was that something did happen between the two of us that evening and if we did choose to ignore it, it would be a huge insult to each other, our relationship and our history. It wasn't just a kiss in the passing because we had both gotten swept up in the pace of the dance. The way we danced closely probably had a lot to do with why we couldn't hold back but that kiss was purely on us. He was aware of that too. He said that he kissed me for the same reason I kissed him back. I kissed him back because I wanted to.

There was no way we could talk about that and come to a conclusion that would not hurt the both of us or threaten everything we had worked hard for.

I checked my ringing phone anyway, if at least to see 'Hyung' pop up on the screen but the name that was there this time was not his. It was Baekjae Sunbae.

"Excuse me. I need to take this call." I said and got up from my seat.

"Must be Changmin Sunbae." Yeojun chuckled.

Hearing that made my heart clench. The others knew nothing about what had happened and I couldn't possibly tell them either.

Outside the meeting room, I hesitated to pick up the call. It could even be Changmin calling from Baekjae Sunbae's phone because I wasn't answering his calls. But, then again, what if it wasn't?

Swallowing my doubts, I answered the call. "Hello?"

"Ah. Jeongwoo. I was just about to cut the call. I'm glad that you answered." Baekjae Sunbae's pleasant voice came through and I immediately felt all the tension leave my body. At the same time though, there was this small feeling of disappointment.

What was I really hoping for?

"Ah. Sorry. I had to step out of the meeting room."

"Are you in a meeting? You did not have to answer then."

"No. I can talk now." I said. "What is it, Sunbae?"

"Well, today's our last day here. You can't really say 'last day' because we're already at the airport but... we'll reach Korea tomorrow in the morning."

"I thought you were supposed to be back tonight."

"We pushed it to a later flight." Baekjae Sunbae explained. "I called to fix the program for tomorrow. The premier's at 06:00 pm and there's dinner afterwards. I can meet you at 04:30 pm, if you're free by then because 04:00 am have to come to office in the afternoon for work anyway. Does that sound okay for you?"

What do I do?

04:00 am was going to be in the building and I was supposed to meet Baekjae Sunbae but how could I just go and meet Baekjae Sunbae like that? There was always the possibility of running into Changmin but more than that, it might not sit well with him that I responded to and even went out with Baekjae Sunbae when I wasn't even reading the messages that he was sending me. I wouldn't have even gotten close to Baekjae Sunbae had it not been for Changmin. How could I possibly meet up with Baekjae Sunbae and keep a straight face about the whole thing? Changmin might pop up in conversations too. What would I do then? I wasn't so confident about being able to maintain the front of nothing having gone wrong between us. What if Changmin decided to show up there? What was I supposed to do? And if I was being frank, I did not want to meet anyone from 04:00 am who was not Changmin.

But Baekjae Sunbae…

"Jeongwoo?" Baekjae Sunbae called when I did not respond.

"Yes. Is… Is anyone else coming?"

"No. It's just you and I." He replied. "I can bring only one person with me."

"I see." He was already aware that I had cleared up my schedule for this weeks ago. I couldn't possibly say that something had come up. Besides, forgetting the fact that he was a member of 04:00 am, he was my role model and friend. I had been looking forward to it too. How could I back out now? "04:30 pm? I might be in a meeting. We have one scheduled till then but it might extend into a few more minutes."

"That's alright. Text me where you might be around that time. I'll go to where you are." He said.

"I'll do that then." I could not back out now. "How was Japan?"

"The event went off really well. It did tire us out though. Right now, four out of the seven of us are asleep. I'll probably sleep on the plane. The event itself was a huge success though."

"That's good to hear. You're probably just waiting to get home now, huh?"

"We are. This is hardly anything compared to our world tour but we're waiting to get home. What about you? How's your new album progressing?"

"Rather smoothly. We'll be beginning work on our songs soon."

"Is that so? All the best with that. Continue your good work. You were in a meeting, right? I'll let you get back to it. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Yes. Thank you. Have a safe trip." I said, hung up and just stood there for a minute longer.

I couldn't back out. I needed to prepare myself for this.

Taking a minute more to calm myself down and ensuring that I would be able to behave like my usual self in front of S.T.A.Y, I returned to the meeting room.