Red Waste #3

I had lost track of the days. I'm exhausted. Hunting golden wheel spiders, I hit lv4.

Every time I ate, I restored a little hp. Somehow, I got enough nutrition to survive, though I can feel the scurvy set in.

Wherever I was, the sun was fucking massive. It dominated the entire sky. I felt like a homeless man being cooked alive on a Los Angelos sidewalk, and let me tell you. They were delicious.

Look, it was an accident, okay? I didn't eat him on purpose.

I learned a few things in the meantime. First, there isn't a day/night cycle, and this planet doesn't spin very much. I had just wandered between the day/night regions.

That means the planet isn't very vast. So where could the rest of the morons have gone? I stared at my feet.

Oh no.

These fuckers all went underground. I've been burning to death up here alone.

I have 50 gold pieces and five ribbons of silk, and I need to buy/sell shit. I burrowed like a naked mole rat with my bare hands for about an hour.

Fuck this noise. I stared at the bleeding stubs that were once fingers and decided to try something else. But wait, didn't that Greatwurm dig real fast? Where was it?

I scoured the red waste for another hour before I found it again. This time, I dodged the exclamation mark, evaded the Greatwurm's jaws, and lassoed a silk rope onto its horns when it tried to go back down.

"Alright, if I fuck up, I let go, then try to get away," I screamed like I was too dumb to breathe. The rope went taut, and I was sucked into the underworld.

I fucking knew it. The subterranean world was filled with Greatwurm tunnels. My body hurt like when I got beaten up by the cheerleading squad for hiding in their changing room. But, before you ask, yes, it was worth it.

Moving on, I crawled in the darkness for a while, not knowing if I was stepping in soil, sand, or Wurm shit.

A gear clicked in my head, and I realized soil was Wurm shit.

The Omnidirectional tunnels had sprawled endlessly, so I left behind a silk trail, like that guy who went to kill the Minotaur. He used magical string in the labyrinth, I think.

What's that smell? Was it cooked human food? I dashed around madly, sniffing like a bloodhound.

Eventually, I found a small alcove with a light source. That was the fire. I cautiously crept up from behind, spying like I once did on those cheerleaders.

"Alright, Craig, what have we got left to eat tomorrow?" A prepubescent voice shrieked at an operatic tenor.

"At this point, each other."