Chapter 40

Pdv Mom Jozy

I had just returned to the hospital when I saw Jozy's friends excited in front of the door with their ears outstretched so I decided to do everything while being discreet. So it's Jozy who launches hostilities.

Me: tell me darling, why did you leave me without saying anything and without sending a sign of life? I say, looking him straight in the eye.

Mau: I was afraid, I couldn't accept that you can die from one moment to another. I don't want to think that and I can't imagine my life without you anymore. Do you know how it was before you arrived? He asks by holding me by the hand. It was so bland and I want you to always be told to finish.

Me: you know Maucisse. Everyone was born to die one day, very early, early, late or very late. Anyway, we're all going to go there. When you love such a deep love as ours you must be ready to suffer very atrociously. I want if misfortune happens one day, you find another one that will make you even happier. Promise, I tell me, shedding a few tears.

Mau: I will make this promise when misfortune is right at our doorstep. Today you are here and I want to take the opportunity to see you smile, cry and play the violin. Just that, it makes me happy, he says by kissing me on my forehead.

We all listened to the discussion carefully because it is a very deep moment for them. Why do these two young people love each other so much? I have no idea. But I'm really happy for my daughter to have been able to meet such great friends and someone she cares about. It is because of them that she accepted the clinical trial, I am very sure. I'm happy for her, at least her life would have been interesting in a way. At the end of the discussion, all his friends launch a "ooorh it's cute" before going home to squeeze my daughter.

PDv Mau.

Just after I had to kiss on Jozy's forehead, I see my friends appear again, those who are supposed to leave are now in the room with a hug grouped in Jozy. I look at them and smile calmly. I say to myself "what are they kids? "

Two weeks later.

Pdv Mau

Jozy has been hospitalized for three weeks now and today she is being let out. Did it work? Maybe or not, but we keep hope. After all, what more does humans have than hope to fight and continue to believe? I'm going to meet my friends at Jozy's who will go home. With his mother's permission, we organize a small happy arrival party, the girls take care of the food and we take care of the drink and some preparations.

It is now fifteen o'clock and we are heading to Jozy's house, just to be there before his arrival and thus surprise him. By car everyone.

Pdv Jozy.

This day I feel much too grateful to several things and several people. Shortly, my life stopped going to school and coming back waiting for my next death. In the space of a year, I have known great people who make me feel special, who make me want to fight for myself and for them. I am very grateful to the life, God and my friends I frequent. I'm in my bed waiting for my parents to pick me up, in the meantime I chat with strangers on the networks since no one answers me, they must be super busy with classes lately and I will be very busy too because I missed a lot of classes. But what am I grateful and joyful?? I feel happy. Even if I died today, it would be in joy because I finally got everything I wanted: love. My parents have just returned to my hospital room.

Me: ah thank you God, I am released by getting up and taking my things under the joyful gaze of my parents.

Doctor: you are full of energy yourself. Let's hope that the try works and that way you will have a lifetime in front of you, my darling, he says with a smile.

Me: let's hope I just say with a smile.

I go out immediately and go into my father's car. I can't wait to go home, find my bed, drink good hot chocolate in the morning, go to school, play the violin, just that I'm super happy. My parents join me and the old one starts almost immediately.

Dad: I hate this place, he says dryly.

Mom: really.

I just smile and look at the road. But what was the weather like, the trees along the roadside, the sun not too strong, a mixture of freshness and heat, the very blue sky covered with thick cloud. Lost in my thoughts I fell asleep.

Dad: Jozy, Jozy wake up we arrived.

I stretch a little and get out of the car, I was in such a hurry that I leave my belongings in the car to get into my house, at least put my feet in the house before going out to do what I have to do. I opened the door that I see all my friends, shouting "surprise", I was already at the end of the excitement when I heard violin sounds. From the first note I recognize the song, it's the one we performed at the contest but this time Nando gets into it with piano and it fits perfectly well, yes I played this melody but I've never been a spectator, it's a very beautiful melody, Lyna and Eve holding the violin hard against their chests as if they were making Stupid challenges or contests but I think they want to show me their attachment, Nando who is transported by the piano and Mau who comes out of I don't know where with a microphone, but what is he crazy? He begins to sing on melodies, his voice is so soft, he sings saying:

I looked for you, I was aiming for the moon,

You knew me when my heart was bitter,

When love left my chest,

I walked on a path full of mist.

I was not born in fortune,

My only wealth: my friends and family,

I made my fortune in comedy and writing,

And you will be eternal in my posthumous projects.

Opinions and criticisms will not be unanimous,

Yet committing suicide is so easy.

I pretended to the world, loving or facing them,

But in the mirror, reality catches up with me, I am only a child.

Is it better to remain anonymous?

I don't know who loves me or who loves me anymore.

But I'll know it well over time.

I don't invent these words for you,

You are my moon and I only see you.

You are my moon and you warm me up.

My past is nothing more than a field of ruin,

I advance with injury and bitterness,

Far from my childhood neighborhood, in exile,

I imagine that one day its inhabitants will get by, amin.

The end may be like in the movies,

And in the scripts, mine or not you will be my heroine.

I'm on the way despite all the pitfalls,

In the house, in the middle there is my sister who draws me.

If I hadn't met you, there won't be all this joy that drives me,

My life will be bland and with no feeling,

Then I won't hope one day to find the mother of my children.

Too much harm in my soul,

If I am expelled, I become a ghost,

Too much love in my person,

Be silent, I love you Jozy.

I burst into tears, I look him in the eyes and he looks me in the eyes while continuing to sing to tell me that each of his words was for me and that it was very sincere. He ends his song by saying: "Let's keep living", I couldn't hold back, I leave all my emotions and I let my tears shed, Nando, Eve and Lyna play their last note in unison and they all go to me for a grouped hug, I can see a smile on my parents' faces before closing my eyes. I feel so good.