Chapter 21: Not A Lucid Dream

I tapped my finger on my desk and exhale from my mouth. My heart racing fast since the morning because today, it's not like the other day. My heart racing, smile drawn on my face, and I can't think of anyone but her. She already stole my heart for the past 3 months.

"Ms. Gabriella?" Oh right. I'm in the middle of something important. After my meeting with my mentor, he gives me advice to keep going and do my best. Maybe I should meet with Sarah after this.

If Kwang In was here, I told him to witness this. "Ms. Gabriela," I straightened my body. "Can you tell us why we included?" Mr. Ramdan asked.

"Good… morning ladies and gentleman." I cleared my throat. "I called all of you wanted to tell something important because I want to… makes some changes for this company. In front of you, there's a contract page, read carefully and don't talk. If you don't understand, you can use a sticky note in front of you to write your questions."

They flip the page in sync and read. I'm doing this because I should test their patient. Some of them already use their sticky notes and some of them flipping the page fast, then signed without reading. This is my idea from the beginning, honestly.

I keep thinking about what I said several days ago to her. I'm not expect everything was fine. This is insane! I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. Shit, this memory again.

I accidentally bump my fist onto the table. As I opened my eyes, all of them looked at me. Shit. "I-I'm sorry, please continue." Ah… that one close call.

Flashback on

I hold her body, then pushed her. "H-hold on!" No, I can't do this. Rose blinked her eyes and raised her eyebrows.

"I… like you as a woman. Not as someone who only wants your innocent." I took a deep breath and that words not actually true. I do like her, but I don't want to have any relationship at the moment. Everything I said in my mouth will become a major risk for us.

I can't cover lies for the rest of my life. It will open when it is. "Why? Everyone who closed to me will end up sleep with me. Why you reject?"

She felt frustrated. I can imagine how her rough life was. "B-because…" come on, think! You are an author. You wrote romantic words in your books, but now I've got eaten by my own words. "I… love you?" I raised my eyebrow.

"You… love me?"

Oh shit. Okay… you should find a reason as soon as possible and ending this awkwardness. "L-listen," don't get thrilled yet, my darling. "I… don't know it's a love, or else, but please, give me a time to make sure I did not hurt your feeling."

What was that!? Did I just confess everything to her?! She exhales, then looks at me. "You right, Lobak. I'm sorry I just…"

Shit. I pulled her closer, then embrace her. Honestly, it is not bad to having her on my side. She's kind, caring, and my type. I know we have a terrible start, but… I'm not sure about my feeling yet. I pushed her.

"I mean it, Rosemary Salsabila. I think I'm in love with you." She staring into my eyes with tears on her. "Y-you can call me douche, asshole, jackass or something bad nickname on me, but I'm terrible at lying!" Whatever. What happened to me next, let her decide. Besides, we're not a child anymore.

"Honestly, at the first I met you, I thought you are the worst person I've ever met." What? "What I witnessed today, I'm sure you just… a victim like me." She pulled my nape. We share the same air now, and… our lips stick together.

She stole my first kiss. My heart beats fast. We kissed until we were out of breath. I put my hand on my left chest and I can feel something inside my stomach. What people called this feeling?

I can see her face began to red. Does she like me too? Our heart beats in sync. She pushed me and put her hand on my shoulder. "What do we do now?" she asked.

I looked into her eyes and something was… strange. My face smiling without my notice. I don't know what we should do next.

Flashback off

I spun my phone as if it's a fidget spinner. Someone said that spinning that thing will reduce your addiction. What if I call it's a bullshit claim? I spin my phone for hours and I've got bored. Argh! This boredom chilling me to the bone.

I leaned my back and keep daydreaming about her. I forgot to ask about her number, social media, and whatever I want to ask about her. We're dating.

I heard a knocking door, and Delinda gets inside my room with a straight face. I should face her no matter what. She's my past. I stand up and buttoned my suit. "Have a seat. I want to talk about your pension."

No one will reject my call if someone talked about money. She takes a seat on the couch in the middle of this room. She's not my employee anymore. I'm unbuttoned my suit and sit in front of her. "You trimmed?"

I'm nodding my head. It's a new page. I handing her a brown envelope. "Please count your money." Delinda shook her head and took a deep breath.

"You never lied," she said with no expression. We standing up and walking to the door. As I opened her a door. She slaps my face twice, then goes.

She hasn't changed. Delinda is still my Lily. I took a deep breath and exhale it slowly. Somehow, I still wonder what was our relationship before? I picked my phone and smiled. Maybe I should open my heart to her, but what if she's come back to me?

I gripped my phone and shook my head. "Let's we think about it later, shall we?" Right. Maybe I should think about it later.

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I looked at her as she approached me with her mom. "So, you are my daughter's girlfriend, huh?!" I grabbed her bag and followed them get inside of their house.

"My name is…" she cut my words by slamming the door in front of me. Shit. I think she already hates my presence. Rose tapped my shoulder.

"I'm sorry. She's not in the good mood for meeting people today."

Rose pleased me to seat on the chair. What a peaceful environment. "Can I ask for… a day off?" She asked.

"I wanted to help you to cleaning the house." She furrowed her brow. "I-I mean, I want to get to know you more. Is that okay with you?" I raised my eyebrow.

She nodding her head and hummed. "What about your work? You need to…" I pulled her closer and staring into her eyes.

"I-It's fine, don't worry. Call me if you need anything or… help. I'm good at cleaning." We walked to where I parked my car. Shit, my heart beating so fast.

"Don't drink too much! You can only drink one glass!" I'm nodding my head. "Don't forget to drink your meds. I already split them into day and night."

She's cute that way. I took a deep breath and get into my car, then start my engine. Dear Rosemary Salsabila, can you be my first and last kiss? I rolled down my car window. "Hey," she looks at me. "I will miss you." I stepped on my gas before she answered.

God damn, what's wrong with me? I took a deep breath and looks at my back. I hope it's only a dream. If it's a dream, I don't want to wake up.

TBC