Which way was it again?

I once drowned when I was twelve. The feeling was not pleasant but- I still remembered the fright in mother's eyes. And that was in the middle of the summer vacation too. So, the whole thing was filmed. After all, we were on a family vacation. And when I saw the whole thing later with my cousin- I knew, this stuff was anything but pleasant. 

Meaning, I knew exactly what I was doing.

That didn't mean I shook any less. I was shivering both with the cold and fright. What if she never wakes up?

What if- she- dies?

Needless to say, though I tried to act calm, I was not calm and I was panicking way more than I ever thought. 'Calm- stay calm.' It was not working. 

I put in adequate pressure and even tried to give her mouth to mouth. If she died now, then what was the point in all that?

I also tried to use my holy magic, but so far nothing worked. I kept up the CPR but- it wasn't working. One hand just wasn't enough for it to be effective.