Forgotten Inside The Closet

^-^

"Let's just eat breakfast. I'm hungry. The photos may be good but my stomach doesn't care."

She pulled the chair, sat down, and poured herself another cup of coffee.

Andrei did the same, and the breakfast was spent with the usual exchange of talks about their common friends or some random people from their circle.

It's been a while since she had a casual talk with Andrei.

After hearing about what people they knew back then are doing now, he commented, "I feel old now."

"I don't. I feel like I got stuck somewhere between the age of twenty-three and twenty-four."

"With what you are doing, I won't be surprised if you do. You are still acting like you are in your early twenties, having no idea of what you want in life."

"That's rich coming from you," she clicked her tongue, feeling attacked. "Acting high and mighty. Tell me have you already figured out your life?" She rolled her eyes as she splattered a thick amount of butter in her toast.

Andrei scoffed. Not knowing what to say to what she said. They both knew he had no idea what he was doing with his life.

From what people can see, they could easily assume he does. He was able to establish a successful business with his partner without the influence of his family name.

He was able to prove to his mother that enrolling in Furniture Design at the university wasn't a mistake and a waste of tuition fees. He was able to apply what he learned to his business.

In spite of all the assumptions his mother made about what would happen if he didn't listen to her, he was proud of proving her wrong and pursuing his own interests on his own.

His mother made a bold prediction on how he would fail miserably with his chosen career. But he persevered and made all the naysayers shut their mouths.

His furniture line was so successful he was able to start a company, and now they are venturing into home design and other things.

The business was so successful that he brought his company to Asia. They opened their first store in Singapore.

They originally intended to open their first store outside of Europe in the Philippines, but he changed his mind as he was still afraid of his mother.

Thus, he decided that their first store should be in Singapore, and once they had established their company there, they could open a store in the Philippines.

That was three years ago. The Singapore branch was a success, but instead of putting the store in the Philippines as he originally planned, he had the next store in Asia in Korea.

Their Scandinavian minimalist furniture line sold out in the first week of their opening.

After the success of their second store in Korea, he promised himself that this time, he would truly put up the next store in the Philippines.

That was a year ago. Still no store in the Philippines.

Every time he comes home, even though he has already successfully made a name for himself, he still feels small in the presence of his mother.

He wasn't sure if he already had his shit sort out after all these years. The only thing he could do as replied to Laurie's question was to scoff and roll his eyes - a very mature thing to do.

"As I expected." she clicked her tongue.

"I guess, we are still as fucked up as ever," he said, conceding.

"Speak for yourself. Don't lump me with your shit."

"Huh!? Excuse me -- who do you think you are? Seriously?"

"Excuse you --" she raised her eyebrow in disgust, "The difference between us was that I don't pretend that I had my life in order."

A mocking tone accompanied his question. "And that made you better?"

"I am not. And I never claimed otherwise. I made all the shitty decisions I had in the past, well aware that I would regret them somewhere along the way, but then, I still did them because it might not have been a good idea at the time - prolly until now - but boy, it was so much fun!"

Andrei shook his head slowly at her, "How does it work for you?"

"Hmm, not something I would be proud of. However, I never live my life so that others can be proud of me."

He scoffed sarcastically with her answer, yet, at the back of his mind, he was a bit envious that through the years, Laurie was able to be true to herself.

He can't say the same thing to him.

When he was in the fourth grade of elementary school, he realized he was different from other boys his age. He has since retreated into hiding.

He hid how he likes his seatmate in the school. His young self knew he couldn't speak about that at his all-boys school.

He can't tell that secret crush to his mother.

It was something that is unacceptable.

Not considering the fact that his mother was a devout Catholic and his father was then a Lieutenant general.

He has no one to tell his secret, which is hidden deep at the bottom of his closet. Until when he was a sophomore in high school and a boy named Eric asked if he could borrow his pen.

Things changed drastically then.

He found new courage to hold the other boy's hand under the blanket when they shared a tent with two other boys for boy scout camping.

His life shifted in a different direction when the other boy returned his grip. A teenager Andrei, fell asleep in a cramped tent with a huge goofy smile on his face.

"My offer still stands. If you want to sit down with your mother to tell her what happened in Hong Kong, just let me know. I'll go with you," she threw him a smile.

He felt like crying after being pulled out of his thoughts. Because all these years, the teenager Andrei remained buried deep inside the closet. He never let him out.

He pretended that the young Andrei didn't exist.