CHAPTER 063: Platform fighter Tuesday, pt. 4

The weak river bass, cooked whole, looked closer to a flounder. It was garnished with glowing ginger and golden scallions, which gave the dish such an aromatic scent that two of the freshman fighters couldn't help but charge in.

The first, named Incredible Pork, suffered from advanced hybridization. His face resembled a boar's, and his body was covered in a thick hide. This, coupled with his corpulent form, meant that most attacks bounced helplessly off him.

Since such a power wasn't effective in stealing lunch boxes, this fighter instead charged directly ahead. He hoped to gore young Li Bao, and gobble the food immediately after.

The second, named Zeke the Freak, was lithe with lanky limbs. His ribs poked through his chest, and even Li Bao had thicker biceps. But, the way this freak could stretch and contort himself spelled doom for any who entered his grappling range.

Li Bao taunted in between bites of fish, always making sure the pig-faced man's charge separated him from the grappler.

"Oh, yum! This is so good! You don't know what you are missing here."

SNORT! "Stay still, and I'll know soon enough!"

"No way. Besides, you can't seem to turn so good; I think this is goodbye."

Li Bao sidestepped to reveal the edge of the platform directly behind him. Incredible Pork tried to stop, but his inertia was too great!

"Ugh! If I can't eat that, neither can you!"

He reached back and gripped Zeke's arm as he went over the edge. However, like an eel, it slipped right through his grasp. The cracking of his dislocated wrist popping back echoed into Li Bao's ears.

"So you do have bones, after all. I could have sworn you were trying to steal some from my meal."

"Oh, I'll take that meal! The God of Elasticity says good things will happen if I do."

"Why call yourself a freak, if you are blessed?"

"Come closer, I'll tell you."

"No thanks," Li Bao said while continuing to retreat. From his side, the fourth fighter approached.

"Don't tell me you want to steal my lunch too?"

"Ha! Keep your food to yourself. I, Mister Perfect Genes, shall be taking your title of 'Wonderkid' today!"

He was a topless man with blue eyes, blonde hair, and a physique like John Rambo's. He wore finely tailored jeans, and expensive combat boots.

"Oh, I accept your challenge... But to make it fair, shouldn't we eliminate the third wheel first?"

"I see your point... Okay," Mister Perfect Genes exclaimed, before pouncing on Zeke. Like a python, Zeke constricted around him. But, when he tried to put the pressure on, he found he could not.

"Ha! My genes have created a body too perfect to submit to a mere arm bar!"

"I've got all four of your limbs locked, stupid! Where did you learn to count?"

"Why don't you teach me then," he said while punching the freak in his face.

"How many fists was that? I always lose count after 30."

Under the storm of blows, Zeke could not hold on. He passed out, and was unceremoniously thrown from the platform.

"Now, let us settle things! Here and now, we will find out which country has the most perfect boy!"

"Aren't you a little too rugged to still be calling yourself a boy?"

"I am 16, the same age as you! And if a boy later becomes a man, then this body is more suitable. Not like the twink-ish frame you sport!"

"I don't even know what that means, but I've finished my lunch. Let's go!"

He casually tossed the empty bento box over his shoulder, hoping to distract from the chopsticks still in his hand. As Mister Perfect Genes approached, Li Bao thrust it forward like an ice pick towards the hero's throat.

Perfect Genes, in response, punched the chopstick. It shattered into countless splinters under the sledgehammer-like force of his fist.

Li Bao backed away, throwing his second chopstick as cover.

"He wasn't lying about having a perfect body. Luckily, whatever group is behind him didn't invest much in the brains department. Good thing, otherwise I'd have to go demon mode..."

Perfect Genes unleashed a barrage of fists, ranging from quick jabs to rampaging haymakers. Li Bao, by contrast, kept things quick and agile.

He weaved around the bigger fighter, occasionally throwing a frog punch to an exposed joint in the process. Since they did not hurt much individually, Perfect Genes remained focus on attacking.

Finally, a stray blow managed to connect. It sent Li Bao hurtling towards the edge of the platform but, as he flew away, the Wonderkid delivered a ferocious kick to the knee.

To his surprise, Perfect Genes found himself collapsing as a result of this kick. His knee cracked the concrete when it landed, but the dull throbbing pain that generated was the least of his problems. Suddenly, all at once, the many places struck by Li Bao locked up.

"UGH! Come on! Not now!"

Indeed, now was a bad time to be frozen. Li Bao was only barely hanging onto the platform, and it'd take a simple stomp to knock him off.

Try as he might, however, the American could not get back up to capitalize on this advantage. He could only watch helplessly as Li Bao recovered.

"What wizardry is this!?!"

"Calm down, it's just basic pressure points. I'd be more worried about this incoming landing, if I were you."

With a shove, Li Bao pushed the frozen Perfect Genes off the platform to the ground below.

DING! DING! DING!

"What an exciting match! And I'm grateful there's only one more before lunch!"

"Indeed, I was ready to fight that kid if he didn't finish it sooner. Bringing such good food on the field, without sharing, should be illegal."

"You are the hero, why not suggest that to whomever is organizing this whole thing?"

"HA! You think my clout is that good? Go ahead and announce the next match already, I'm starving!"

"Yes! In the circular corner, Red Cap!"

The dwarf appeared on his platform, mumbling in anticipation.

"Oh boy, papa is gonna dye you dark red tonight! Just you... Wait!"

The other three fighters were

1.) Skele-tonne, a metal skeleton with the ability to manipulate its own weight.

2.) Swiss Army Scarecrow, a hag construct filled with malicious surprises in its hay.

3.) Marble Master, a kid who controlled a large marble lion from the safety of his corner platform.

"This is a rip-off! Where's the blood!?! Where's the gore!?! I want to fight other people! Somebody trade matches, quick."

Since his request was impossible to fulfill, Red Cap won his match while issuing a constant sigh throughout. After getting teleported away, and cleaning all the motor oil and bone meal off, he finally cheered up.

"Oh well, maybe I can mooch off that kid again. It'll beat whatever else is going on, at least..."