DAY 7

DATE : 26/03/2020

"Betrayed it's what is felt from both side

We are left apart after a silly fight

She is ready to blame me

And I am ready to take it

Now she was a family

In my house of roses

we added her as Lilly

She decided to ruin the whole garden

Cause she thinks, She is the one wounded.

Now that last night I cried

I regreted why I didn't did as I decide

I never wanted to make friends

But why she came She said little time can be spent.

Dear best friend,

Thanks for leaving me

Thanks for blaming me

Thanks I learned never

Make friends. "

Hey there I am back again, so today I don't anything special beside meet and greet.

why people are concern loving when you are leaving , maybe we think we have enough time to meet unless we realize that time is taken for granted.

BTW about above poem it has Little history.

it is for my bestie Its not about yoongi because I said it earlier he is my childhood crush so being friends or best friend was little difficult in my case.

so I had this girl as my friend i won't take her name let's called her Lilly. so Lilly and me we met at college ,it was just not me and Lilly it actually our friend circle is actually a triangle. so me Lilly and rose our another best friend. we were all good until Lilly decides to change her Field she went to arts.

fast forward in time the day it was all broken. and the above poem was written. Actually things were little heated up from past weeks we were not talking because Lily showed gift of rose without my permission. I was angry because obviously it was our gift and it was suprise I never liked those people who ruin suprises.

so I just said are you stupid you shouldn't have showed it we were about to gift Her right. so she said what I felt like showing so I did it. I was like what the fuck then I calmed myself up and said sorry for my behavior here I have adapted the habit of saying sorry to everything littel thing.

after some week my mom and I had a great fight I was broken and sad angry all kind of Fucked emotion. so I texted her late at night we were talking ,by auto-correct my spelling went wrong so I deleted the messages and re- texted her so she made fuss that what you don't wanna share feeling now what was there inside it so I honestly said it was auto-correct mistake so I just re texted but she was like no this and that something stupid.

we didnt talked for a while so, obviously we had exams so we were busy me and rose are in same field were as Lilly has dropped out

So we decided to text in grup let's catch up its been while so here Lily decides to leave the group chat. we were like we asking seriously

after this after 2 days I got text from Rose that Lilly has tried suicide She has slit her wrist. I was hella worried I called her she didn't answered .

I was little sad because Lilly and me were more close and attached then Lilly and rose but she decides to tell this to rose but it was fine Like with who ever she was comfortable with.

so I texted her what's wrong she says something which hurted me but more made me realize how bad I was or I am. I don't know is it right to judge ourselves over someone word

so she says , you guys are same as I expected, you guys only think about yourselves, you guys always have to ruin the plan and days. that's it I remember because it's been while.

like I am confused what really went wrong then after that I decided to call Lilly to what's the really problem but she said she is busy and would text later for which I am still waiting and now dear Lily has blocked me and

and rose.

so why today this because I miss Lilly, I really do I don't know why I feel the pathetic One is here. I am always pathetic One.

you know from childhood I always asked for that one friend to be with me. Beside all love we still need a friend but in the end it's the fact that I don't have friend.

about rose I don't feel she likes me either. I think maybe I am overthinking

so here my overthinking mind and crazy me

for today only this much good night