Comfort

My dad had left an hour ago, leaving Leo and me alone. Leo and I had been together for about three months, but my parents trusted us. It's not as if they had a reason not to, but I'd heard some people complaining about how "uptight" their parents were. They were also involved in illegal activities, though. So, if their parents were "uptight", they had every reason to be. We were laying on the couch, watching a random horror movie about some girl who decided to summon demons because she was upset with life. Well, she was regretting that decision now. As the movie progressed, I found myself dozing off. The movie was interesting, but I just couldn't focus. Something felt off about tonight. My dad wasn't called to work often. Tonight, of all nights, was the worst to work, though. The wind was howling, and it was raining heavily. As much as I disliked my father, I hoped he was safe. He'd been angry throughout the day, for whatever reason. It had something to do with family drama, I knew that much. Lately, my family hasn't been very close. They haven't been distant, just more so than usual. After what my aunt did, though, I couldn't blame him. She had no right to be so callous, especially on his birthday. I sighed, thinking I had done so quietly, noticing Leo's crimson eyes looking at me. His dark hair covered one of his eyes, making him look even more adorable. Suddenly, there was a loud noise that sounded like it originated in the basement.

"Babe?"

"...Yeah?"

"Is anyone else here?"

I shook my head, deciding to whisper," No, it should be just us."

"Should? Do you have another boyfriend I should know about?"

I would've laughed had I not been frightened. There weren't many break-ins in my neighborhood, but they happened occasionally. I stared at him, feeling fear course through my veins. I wasn't a "scaredy-cat". No, I was far from that. I knew how to stand up for myself, especially when angered. The thought of someone breaking in was terrifying, though. It was to me, anyway. As dark as my thoughts were, I didn't want to harm anyone.

"Babe? Babe?"

I blinked, staring back at Leo. I hadn't even noticed he'd been shaking me, nor did I notice that I'd zoned out.

"..Sorry, I'm just slightly afraid. Do you think it's another break-in?"

He tightened his grip from under the blanket, leaning his head on my shoulder.

"If it is, they won't have an easy time getting in."

I mentally hoped Leo was right, for both of our sakes. As much as I had prepared myself for a break-in, I wasn't sure how I would actually respond. I supposed that my fear was part of my actual response since I was only human.

"It's okay," Leo whispered, petting my hair.

I nodded, silently hoping he was right. I couldn't stop the fear that coursed through me, causing me to move closer to the male behind me. The noise had ceased, yet my fear refused to leave.

"It's okay,  love. I'm here, everything will be okay."

I wanted to believe him, but his tone wasn't convincing. He didn't sound frightened,  not at all. His tone seemed more excited than scared. I hadn't known him for long, but I knew he was hiding something. I told him that I was there for him several times, and said he could tell me anything. Yet, he simply thanked me and said some somethings were best to keep to himself. I didn't understand why,  though. Was I not trustworthy enough? Even if we had only been together for three months, I felt very strongly about him.

"Babe?"

"Yeah?"

"What's wrong?"

I laughed lightly, mostly out of nervousness.

"I'm just worried."

"We'll be safe."

"Not about that."

"About what, then?"

"What are you hiding from me?"

I felt him tense, and that's when I knew I had made a mistake.

"It's better that you don't know."

I turned to face him, feeling hurt.

"What's better to not know? I care about you, no matter what you're hiding."

"Then you'll understand why I'm not telling you."

His tone was ice cold but had a hint of anger to it. I just wanted him to tell me what he was hiding, and confide in me. Why couldn't he do that?

"I just...I want you to talk to me. You never tell me about your problems, and I want to listen. I want to comfort you, be there for you. Please, let me."

His eyes held nothing but anger. There was no affection, no soft look in them. He was angry, and I understood why. Yet,  at the same time, I didn't. While it was true that we hadn't been together long, I still felt that we should've been able to tell each other anything. He pushed me away from him, sitting up. I looked at him with pleading eyes, only to meet his unforgiving, cold ones. Silence filled the room for several minutes until he finally spoke. His tone was harsh and angry.

"You have no idea what I deal with every day, you have no idea how I feel. You have no idea what I go through-"

"I wish you'd tell me."

"You don't know me! And, you most certainly don't own me."

I felt tears prick my eyes. He was right, I didn't know him. I sat up, looking at him dejectedly.

"You're right, I don't."

His eyes softened for a moment as he saw my expression," Babe, I-"

"No,  it's fine. I understand you don't want to be with me. I get it, I do. You're free to be with whoever you want."

I stood up, grabbing his coat. The storm had settled,  and now all was calm. Not for me, though. A storm had begun to rage in my heart, but I wasn't angry. I was hurt. Hurt by his tone, by the look in his eyes. Had I done something wrong? Was I not trustworthy? Worst of all, was I not enough? I didn't know, but I knew one thing: I didn't want a relationship that wasn't based on trust. I walked over to him,  smiling sadly as I handed him his coat.

"You're right...I don't know you. I thought I did, but I don't. And, I can't deal with being in the dark. I want to know all of you, even the parts of yourself that you hate, because...I care about you. I've opened myself up to you, and I know we haven't been together for all that long...but, if you can't tell me things, then we can't be together."

His expression changed from regret to hurt and shock, as well as sorrow. He spared me one last glance before walking out the door wordlessly, leaving me to my misery. I heard something 'buzz' and looked on the table to find his phone. I knew it was wrong to invade someone's privacy, so I left it alone. I figured that I'd give it to him tomorrow if I saw him. His phone began to vibrate more rapidly, indicating someone was either calling him or blowing up his phone. Curiosity killed the cat and my manners. I unlocked his phone, clicking on the notification. He had received many messages from some girl named Kaitlyn. I looked at the messages before scrolling through the older ones. Tears began to gather, again. I was right, I wasn't enough. He had been dating her as well. I looked through his other messages, finding nothing else. So, it was just her and me. At least he only used two people, though. The thing that hurt the most was that he said the three words I had wanted to hear from him. They repeated over and over in my head, taunting me.

"I love you."

My heart froze, or it felt like it did. I felt hurt, angry, and most of all, sad. I was such a fool to think someone like him actually cared for me. He only used me, but I couldn't find a way to blame him. I couldn't understand why he did it, but I didn't want to. The door suddenly opened, with him holding it open for himself.

"...I forgot my phone."

My temper flared, I felt as if he had literally stabbed me in the chest. Tears fell from my eyes as he looked at me with a sorrowful expression.

"I-"

"Take your phone."

I could tell my cold tone surprised him. I handed him the phone, glaring at him icily.

"I'm really-"

"Sorry? I don't want to hear it. I understand now, I'm not enough, I never was. I get it, I really do. Have fun with Kaitlyn, she seems to satisfy you more than I do, anyway."

He gave me one last sad look before leaving. Well, I, more or less, shut the door before he could say anything. Still, he left. I locked the door, sliding down it before letting my tears fall freely. How could he? I didn't do anything wrong, did I? Did I push him away, was I too stubborn? Did I not satisfy him? We didn't really do anything, aside from cuddle and occasionally kiss. I wasn't into the "sexual activity" other people were, it just didn't interest me. I told him towards the beginning of the relationship, and he seemed fine with it. He said he understood and felt the same way,  yet those messages had proven otherwise. I couldn't grasp why he had cheated, why he had lied.

"He's scum, he never deserved you."

I looked around for the source of the voice but found nothing to alert me that I wasn't alone. I was alone, especially now.

"On the contrary, my dear."

 "No, don't hurt me!"

I looked up at the screen, remembering that we had been watching a movie. The girl in the movie had heard a voice in her head, too. The voice was the demons, of course. It was simply trying to coax her into submitting to it. I shook my head, trying to laugh it off. Yet, I couldn't fight the adrenaline rushing through my veins. My fear had returned, but this time I wasn't afraid of a robber. I refused to go downstairs, walking quickly, but quietly, up to the living room. I laid back down on the couch, curling up under the covers. The couch was still warm from where Leo had been lying, but he wasn't there anymore. As the realization hit me, tears began to gather again. This was why I hated relationships, they made me feel so weak. They made me open up, only to be hurt again. I began to think that maybe I was weak.

"You are not weak, dear. It is your heart, it misguides you. It leads you down the wrong paths, only for you to be hurt in the end."

My pulse picked up, causing more adrenaline to pump. As scared as I was, I had to admit that the voice was right. My heart was the reason I even talked to Leo. He looked so innocent, so understanding. I felt pulled in by him, by that, and by his appearance. Yet, he was nothing like I thought. What a fool I was.

"No, dear. You are not the fool, you are smart. You're intelligent, charming, sweet. He tricked you, making you think you two had such a trusting relationship. Yet, behind your back he was off with some girl, telling her how much he loved her and wanted to be with her every second of every day."

The more I listened, the more I agreed. The voice was right, maybe not about me, but him. He had deceived me, he had played me like some kind of game.

"Indeed, he did. And, now that he's gone, he can't hurt you anymore. Yet, you're still unhappy."

As crazy as it sounded, the voice was right. I felt ridiculous for feeling sad about his absence. He had cheated, betrayed my trust when I had done nothing but treat him well. Why should I have missed him? Memories flashed through my mind, destroying everything in their path, aside from the sadness.

"Are you going to just lie there and be sad, after what he did? Don't you think he deserves to suffer?"

"What else am I to do, stalk him and anyone who associates with him?"

I knew it was crazy to respond to the voice, especially since it was inside my head. I felt so vulnerable, though. I had lost someone who meant a lot to me, and that person didn't even care.

"That's a brilliant idea, except leave him out. Seeing him will only bring you pain. Stalk this Kaitlyn girl that he claims to love so much, find out who she is. Befriend her, but not as yourself. Disguise yourself, and befriend her while avoiding him."

 It was brilliant, and at that moment, I thought it was the perfect plan. I still didn't trust the voice, but it was brilliant. I wasn't against stalking. In fact, I enjoyed it, sometimes too much.

"That's perfect."

I grinned to myself, laughing madly.

"Indeed it is child, which is why you thought of it."

I stared at the TV, not really paying attention to it. I couldn't stop thinking of what the voice had said. I hadn't thought of it, the voice had. So, why was it giving me credit? Then, it dawned on me. The voice was a monster, it only wanted to use me. Just like him.

"You have it all wrong, dear. He is the monster here, not me. I am here to help you." 

I had a hard time believing it, it seemed too outrageous. Too suspicious. Yet,  it sounded so sincere.

"How am I to know you're telling the truth?"

"Let me prove it."

Prove it? How was a voice to prove it was trustworthy when people couldn't even convince me they were?

"Let me help you."

I couldn't turn it down, I needed comfort. I needed something to keep me sane, even if it was some voice in my head. I nodded, before realizing the voice probably didn't see me nod.

"Alright, I'll give you a chance."

 "Good child."

I could practically hear the grin in the voice's tone, but it didn't set me off. It actually made me smile, somehow.

Weeks had passed now, and I felt better. With the voice's help, I found the Kaitlyn girl he had cheated on me with. I had to admit, she was cute.

"Don't become too attached, dear. She's the reason you no longer have him in your life. Well, not entirely. You were smart enough to break it off, but she is the reason he wasn't faithful."  

Once again, the voice was right. The voice was always right, anymore. I wondered how it knew so much, but I didn't question it. I was just happy to have it with me. It had became someone or something important in my life. It saw through people. When someone seemed interested in befriending me, it told me their actual reason. It warned me about the bad people, which were most people. One day, a girl my age had approached me. She was cute, innocent looking. We had a good conversation, and she had asked for my number.

"Don't do it, dear. She only wants to use you as he did, but for a different reason. She's boy crazy, as they call it. The moment she finds out you don't have any more friends, she'll leave you all alone. Just like he did."

Needless to say,  I didn't give her my number.

"Sorry, my phone's being repaired. I'll let you know when it's done, which will hopefully be by the next time I see you."

I had played it off perfectly, and we laughed it off. I knew I wouldn't see her again, and even if I did, I wouldn't say anything. I didn't need someone like her in my life. I needed someone I could trust, like the voice.

    I laughed as I gazed at my phone. I had successfully befriended Kaitlyn, and I found out a lot about her. She was actually quite sweet, but she was still with Leo. She knew me under a different name than my own, as the voice had suggested. She knew me as Lance and had told me that 'my' name was charming. She sometimes called me "Prince Lance", and flirted with me quite a lot. For someone in a relationship, she had quite the wandering eye. She knew what I looked like as well. I had dyed my hair a darker color, which surprisingly made me look very different. My skin had paled quite a bit, and I now wore contacts instead of glasses. I had changed my appearance completely, and I enjoyed who I had become. Kaitlyn did, as well. Not that she knew before, but she complimented me often.

" You are stunning, my dear. You were, to begin with, but you're even more so now."

The voice had been more affectionate lately, and I wasn't sure why. I enjoyed it, though. It made me feel special, loved.

"You are loved, by me. That's why I'm here, I couldn't stand to see you suffer, or rather feel you suffer. I knew he wasn't good for you as soon as you met him, but you were reaching out for comfort and he took advantage of that. I wanted to make my presence known, but I knew I would only scare you off. And, that was the last thing I wanted to do. I could see that you were happy with him, and he actually seemed to be faithful. Of course, it was obvious he was hiding something, but you knew he was because you're intelligent. Even I hadn't thought he was breaking your trust, behind your back."

The voice had become the one thing that helped me, just about the only thing that did, anymore. My parents didn't help me, not that they ever did. They only stressed me out, but the voice soothed my stress.

"Don't listen to them, dear. They don't know you, not as I do. You're special, and I mean that in an affectionate way. Don't let their abusive words get to you."

Ironically enough, the voice made me smile. Its tone had become kinder and more affectionate than before, and I liked that.

    "Hey,  I..need you."

"What's wrong, Kait?"

She laughed, "I love when you call me that, especially when we talk."

I smiled," I love making you happy."

I had changed my number, just in case Leo recognized it and told Kaitlyn who I really was. Based on the words we exchanged, I figured she didn't let him see them.

"I miss you, so much. Leo has been such a prick lately."

Hearing his name caused my temper to rise, but I played it off, acting as if I only knew him through her.

"Your boyfriend?"

"Yeah, that's him," She sighed.

"What's he been doing?"

"He keeps asking me to do things, and I don't want to..not anymore. And, then when I say no, he has a pissy fit and becomes angry with me. I don't know how much longer I can take it.."

"Come over, I'll make your favorite food and we can cuddle."

I could hear her smile," You're the best, Lance."

"Be careful, dear."  

That night, she came over and we did just as I had said. I comforted her, and she thanked me for being so sweet to her, unlike her bratty boyfriend. I was happy to make her feel better, it became an addiction to see her smile or even know she was smiling. The closer we became, the more I forgot the original plan. I enjoyed spending time with her and hearing her voice. She said she felt the same, which made me even happier. The voice hadn't made itself known in a while, but I knew it was there, silently watching. I had missed it, it was soothing. If it had a body and wasn't a disembodied voice, I figured it would be male.

"Don't look behind you, dear."

This time, I didn't listen. My curiosity had overcome my obedience to the voice. And, as soon as I looked back, I regretted it. Walking behind me was Leo, but he wasn't paying attention. He was too busy staring at his phone to notice me. I felt my temper flare and at the moment, I wanted to grab him by his throat and choke him until he couldn't breathe.  

"Not yet, my dear. The time will come."

I nodded, turning back around before I did anything. Just as I began to walk away, though, I heard his damned voice call my name. I turned to face him, masking my anger.

"Oh, hey there."

He smiled at me, not an ounce of regret showing in his natural blue eyes," How have you been?"

I smiled back as my blood boiled," I've been great, how have you been?"

He scowled slightly," Not bad, but my girlfriend has been such a pain."

I felt as if I was on fire, my anger was slowly becoming rage. He didn't even feel bad for cheating, it was as if he had done nothing wrong. But, I knew he had.

"How so?"

"She's been so clingy lately, telling me I should be more like this guy named Lance. I don't even know who the hell Lance is!"

I stood still, unsure of what to say. The fact that Kaitlyn had mentioned me, or rather the fake account she knew me under, made me happy.

I feigned a thoughtful expression," Maybe he's an actor or some character from a recent movie she's watched."

"Who the hell knows, she's so annoying," He scanned over me before looking into my eyes," I miss being with you. I should've never let you go."  

"That bastard."

I froze upon hearing the voice's tone, it was angry. I had never heard it become angry before, but it was terrifying. Before I knew what was happening, I saw a male with dark hair and scarlet eyes lunge at Leo, aiming for this throat. I could only watch wordlessly as the male choked Leo, causing him to attempt to shove the male off of him. That was the last thing I saw before I passed out, seeing nothing but darkness.

    Months have passed since I saw the male choke, Leo. It turns out that the male was the voice. I had to admit, I was quite attracted to the voice. Yet, at the same time, I was with Kaitlyn. She had broken up with Leo after the incident, which wasn't him being choked. She had found some girl stroking where he had been choked, with her tongue. She was hurt and broke up with him. Now, we were together. She said Leo still bothered her, apologizing and asking for her back. He even tried to guilt her into getting back together with him, but she had told him that she had found someone else. She told him that she had found someone who actually treated her right, and not like some sex toy to drop when the deed was done with. She told him that she was happy, much happier than when she was with him. I know this because she showed me the messages. I had hugged her after she showed me, telling her proud of her I was. She had smiled and hugged back, saying that she loved me. That's when I realized that I was in too deep because I had felt the same. And, I had told her exactly that, leaving out the part about being in too deep.

    "I missed you, where have you been?"

I stared at the voice, who was the male from before. He hadn't told me his name, but I didn't necessarily need to know. I just needed him.

"I'm here, dear. I'm always there, watching. You've been doing a wonderful job of fulfilling the plan, which is nearly coming to an end."

I wondered what the end of the plan was, exactly. Based on his expression, it wasn't good. I trusted him, though. I needed him. Before I knew it, he was hugging me. Or, I had hugged him. I wasn't sure which, but it didn't matter because the hug was mutual.

"You really have missed me, haven't you?"

I nuzzled his neck with my nose, closing my eyes contently," Of course I have, I need you. Just because I'm with Kaitlyn doesn't mean I don't need you. You know me better than she does, much better."

I felt him tense up slightly upon hearing me say her name but calmed down once I explained how he knew me better.

"I love you, dear."

I smiled, looking into his beautiful scarlet eyes," I love you, too."

I hugged him tighter, but not too tight. Just tight enough that he was as close to me as I wanted him.

"I want to cuddle, with you."

I could hear the smile in his tone as I held him close.

"I would love to, my dear. Holding you close to me is much more pleasing than simply talking with you."

Before I knew it, we were both on the couch, with him lying behind me. I turned to face him, moving as close as I could. I just wanted to be close to him, I needed to be close to him. He was the only one who truly knew me, who truly cared. Kaitlyn and I may have been together, but she didn't truly know me. She knew me as Lance, the sweet prince who saved her from the dragon. The dragon being Leo. The only difference was I didn't slay him, as much as I wish I could've.

"Dear?"

I looked up at him," Hmm?"

"Why are you still with Kaitlyn, when we could be together?"

The question had thrown me off, I wasn't sure what to say. Why was I still with her? Yes, I cared about her and she was cute. Yet, I didn't really open up to her. He was the only one I truly opened up to.

"I...don't know."

"Break up with her."

I felt startled, his tone was demanding. He wasn't asking me to, he was telling me to. Somehow, that send pleasant chills down my spine, causing him to laugh lightly.

"B-but I don't want to hurt her like he did, I like being there for her and-"

"You can comfort her as a friend, you don't need to be with her. What's going to happen when she wants to do things and you don't? It will be like dating him all over again, but with a female."

He was right, it wasn't smart to be with her. Plus, she made me forget the plan. I couldn't be with her anymore, I knew I couldn't fulfill her needs. I could only give her comfort and a sense of security, and one doesn't need a significant other to do that. I knew she'd want to do things, and I wouldn't.

I nodded, feeling sad," You're right," I laughed sadly," As usual."  

He smiled at me," It's okay, my dear. I will always be here, no matter what."

I smiled at him, feeling tears fall from my eyes.

"Shh, it will all be okay, my dear. Let it out."

I cried into his chest that night as he held me, whispering sweet nothings into my ear. His presence relaxed me, and I found myself falling asleep to the sound of his soothing voice.

"I am always here for you, my dear...whether you realize it or not." 

"What?! B-but Lance, I...I love you!"

"I..love you, too, but I can't satisfy your needs."

"What are you talking about? You already have, please. Please don't do this. I-I need you!"

I held back my tears, or attempted to," I know, and I'm here for you, always. I still want to be friends, but...I want you to find someone who can fulfill your needs. I will always be here to comfort you, though."

I heard her crying on the other line, and it broke my heart.

I managed to choke out the words," I'm sorry..."

"It's okay, dear. I'm here, let it out."

I looked around, finding him standing behind me.

"I'll..let you go. Text me when you want to, I'll be here be for you, always."

With that, I hung up, feeling heartbroken. Even in my heartbroken state, I could tell he was unhappy with my gentle tone towards her. Yet, he said nothing. He simply sat down behind me, wrapping his arms around me.

"I am here, my dear."

Once again, I turned to face him, crying into his chest as he held me.

"It's better this way, dear. Please remember that."

I knew he was right, he always was.

"So, Leo asked for me back, again."

Kaitlyn and I were friends again, it hadn't taken long for us to recover. That was mostly due to how close we were. We never really acted as if we were dating, in the first place. I was simply supportive of her, and she clung to me for comfort. We were more of friends than anything.

"What did you say to him?"

"I told him no, I said I was...recovering."

I scowled," I'm sorry."

She laughed, but it sounded strained," No, it's fine. You were right. I do have other needs, and you were more cuddly and sweet. We're better as friends."

As much as it hurt to hear her say it, I knew she was right.

I laughed lightly, masking my sadness," You're right, plus...it's easier this way."

"It really is."

"I need to come over, now."

"What's wrong?"

"You have some explaining to do."

"Kait, what are you-"

"Don't call me that, I'm coming over and you're explaining everything to me."

"What do you-"

She said my real name and I froze. She knew the truth, and I knew that Leo had told her.

"I...when are you coming over?"

"Now."

I heard a knock on the door and realized she was there.

"At last, the final part will be fulfilled."

I wasn't sure what he meant, but just by his tone, I knew it wasn't good. I opened the door, and she walked in, looking at me angrily. That's when she slapped me across the face, causing my head to turn to one side.

"That bitch, how dare she hurt what's so precious to me? She will know the pain she has caused to you, my dear. Do not worry."

I noticed him grin madly as he stood behind her. I tried to warn her, but nothing came out. And, before I knew it, she was lying on the ground with a knife in her chest. I could only stare at her, unsure of what to do. I looked at him, seeing him grinning madly as he looked at her.

"Finally...finally she's gone. Now, he can suffer. He'll think she's ignoring him and feel miserable. Then, he'll just kill himself upon feeling helpless. And, now...you're all mine. Two birds in one stone!"

He began to laugh madly as I stared at him, unsure of what to do.

"Come here, love."

I froze in fear, but I couldn't say no. I trusted him, and I needed him more than anything now. He was all I had. My parents were gone, and now Kaitlyn was gone. I followed his instructions, feeling broken.

"I need you."

"I know you do, my love, and I need you to need me. You're mine, and she was in the way. Now, we can truly be together."

He grinned as he held me close. I stared at him with a broken-hearted gaze, causing his smile to falter. He placed his hand on my cheek, rubbing a stray tear away.

"Don't fret, my love. You still have me, and as you said, you need me. I'm all that you have, all that you need. I am the only one who understands you or ever will. I will always be here for you, because...I love you."

His words soothed my pain and I hugged him tight," Don't ever leave me."

"I won't, dear. Don't worry, I won't."