Alexa’s POV:
When I woke up the next morning, I was in a lot of pain, Nate was still asleep, I carefully got up and went to the kitchen and grabbed my meds, I took what I was supposed to then grabbed a bottle of water, after that I headed back to the room, Nate was passed out still, he must have fallen asleep making sure I was ok. I didn’t mind that he slept next to me, I knew right now I wasn’t ready for a relationship, I had no trust and that wasn’t good, mason took every last bit of trust I had for guys and flushed it down the toilet. He ruined me and I think it’s going to take me awhile to put myself back together again, life is cruel and unfair. I sat on the bed next to Nate’s sleeping body, I grabbed my purse, reaching inside it I pulled out my journal, the one safety net I’ve had since masons abuse began, yes I know I could have left him sooner, but I didn’t I was stupid to think he’d ever change, I grabbed a pen from my purse as well and opened my journal and I poured my heart into it,
Dear Journal, I know I have skipped a day or two of writing, just so much has happened. Mason lost his shit and beat me up, throwing me down the stairs, injuring me badly, my rotator cuff got torn badly along with some minor muscles, the pain is unbearable that’s for sure, I had surgery done on my shoulder and I’m stuck in a sling for a month. I wish life wasn’t cruel or liked to punish the innocent good people. I met someone amazing though, NF aka Nate he is amazing, funny, kind, sweet, and he listens. I think I’m falling for him or developing feelings for him, it’s too scary though, I’m too afraid to love again, after the way it went down last time I don’t think I could do this again, go through that heartache and stress. I’m losing my mind with my thoughts now, it’s only been two days since I left Mason yet he keeps hitting me up and texting me.
My phone buzzes with a text, I carefully lean over Nate’s sleeping body to grab it, I see the ID Mason, and I roll my eyes and open it,
Mason- Alexa call me now! I’m tired of your games come home
Me- No Mason, we are over if you can’t get the hint or point I will call the cops and they will deal with you accordingly, don’t text me again or the next thing you know there will be cops at your door ready to arrest your abusive ass.
I don’t get another text; I’m shocked since Mason never gives up so quickly.
I think meeting Nate was a blessing, maybe it was what I needed in my life, and maybe I can finally live a life without fear. But I’m not jumping any guns yet, this isn’t going to be easy for me, I spent so much time and wasted it all on Mason, I wasted love and affection, my sanity, nearly cost me my life because I thought he could change I guess I just wished he would, I was stupid and naïve. I won’t make that mistake again, I’ll be more careful the next time I get close to a guy and fall so hard for him, I guess right now I don’t want anyone’s love or attention, I just want to be me for a bit. I won’t lie if Nate does make any advances I won’t push him away, but then I might. I can’t tell what my mind will make me do right now, it’s in a state of hurt, betrayal and no trust. Trust is something you have to earn, it took Mason awhile to get mine and he stomped all over it with his nasty ass habits, I’m unsure if I’ll make it through without nightmares and flinching when someone raises a hand to me, or if they get to close and touch me I might freak. If its Nate, I won’t, his touch is gentle and loving, it almost makes me feel safe.......I don’t think I can open up right this second and I don’t think I can love right now, Nate will earn my trust sooner than later, he’s already proven to me that I can trust him but right now I’m so afraid to admit to trusting a guy, let alone a famous one. My life has changed forever, a famous rapper slept next to me last night, when he could be with ANY girl he wants, he chose to take care of me, take an interest in me, I just hope I haven’t made another mistake. I hope to be able to confess my feelings for Nate one day, but right now it’s too soon, but I would be lying if I didn’t say I started to fall for him the night of the party, the night we met and he gave me his phone number. I guess being a fan of him was worth it, I can’t wait to see what more music he comes out with and I hope to be a part of the journey he’s taking, in time we shall see. That’s all for now journal, Love Lexi.
As I finished writing, my phone buzzed again, waking Nate up, I look down at it and don’t recognize the number, and Nate scares me by saying,
“Who is that?”
“I don’t know, its blocked.” I reply
Nate takes my phone from me; he answers it, “Alexa’s Phone.”
He puts it on speaker as a male responds, “Is Lexa there? It’s Daryl her best friend Holly’s brother.”
Nate looks at me, then hands me my phone,
“Hey Daryl what’s up?”
“I heard what happened are you okay? I know you’re going to be out of work for a month or so, also Holly wants to see you,” Daryl says.
“I’m okay, I’ll be fine. I can arrange some time for Holly if she wants to come get me, I can’t drive until my shoulder is fully healed and I’m off medication. Just tell her to call me I have my phone,” I reply.
“Okay sounds good, ill have her hit you up, feel better soon.” He says
“Thanks Dar,” I reply before we hang up.
A few moments later, Holly calls and we set up a time to go out, after we hang up I get up and go shower, struggling to undress, I hold back all the cries I want to let out, trying not to worry Nate, once I’m done showering, I have too much trouble getting the sling on without hurting myself more,
“Nate?” I call out.
“Yes?” he answers.
“Can you come help me?” I ask.
“Yes, is the door unlocked?” he asks.
“Yep!” I say.
Nate walks in as I look up, the bruises looking worse since it had been a few days, Nate helps me put my sling back on, then he does something that makes me jump, he carefully places his hand on my cheek, but once I jump he pulls his hand back, I see a flash of anger in his eyes, I know it’s not anger at me but Mason, it seems to really bother him that I flinched, I don’t know how long I will be but for now it’s not my fault, I just chose the wrong guy. 10 minutes later there’s a knock at our hotel door, Nate goes to answer it while I put on my wedges, when I walk out, Holly and Nate are talking, Nate looks over at me and smiles, oh boy that smile could kill, it makes my heart want to stop. Just everything about Nate screams I should just trust him, but all in due time I will. I grab my cell phone and purse, Nate pulled me to the side,
“Here take this,” he says handing me a credit card.
“I can’t take that Nate I have enough money, you don’t need to do this,” I reply.
“Hey, Lexa please take it, I’m treating you guys to lunch, and you to whatever you want to buy while you’re out with your friend, have fun, plus I know you need some new clothes, my treat,” Nate says as I take the card.
“Thank you Nate,” I say as he kisses me on the cheek turning my face red.
“You’re welcome, anything for you Lexa,” He replies.
After that we say our goodbyes, Holly and I leave heading for her car, I slid Nate’s card into my wallet as I get into the car and buckle up. Holly smiles at me,
“So NF? How’s that going, I was wondering where you ran off too, my brother said he offered you his extra room if things don’t work out, he really cares about you, I know he has a huge crush on you still, but I also know you aren’t ready for someone, and that you probably are falling for Nate.”
She gets in and starts her car, driving us towards the mall,
“He’s amazing Holly, how did I get so lucky? Also I know he does, I wish I would have picked him back then instead of Mason, probably would have saved myself a lot of pain and suffering, but I made my bed and I had to lie in it, now I’m out finally, I know it took me so long to get strong enough to walk away, to give up on him, and I’m sorry for putting Daryl through that shit, he was always so nice, letting me crash at his place when I needed to get away, but now I can’t trust any guy, I feel so bad but I just got my heart stomped all over and told its all my fault for what’s happened.”
Holly looks at me before saying, “Pick a song, we need to stop talking heartbreak I can see your eyes starting to tear up babe.”
I laugh, “Okay fine, Numb by Conor Maynard and Anth! That’s how I feel right now numb,” I laugh more as Holly starts laughing and hands me her phone so I can put the song on.
We sing along to the song, along with some others by them, we arrive at the mall, we get out and shop. I buy myself a few dresses, a couple pairs of jeans, a few t-shirts, a few long sleeves, a few skirts, a few pairs of shorts, socks, underwear, bras, and a sons of anarchy hoodie. After that we went out to lunch at our favorite place, River Café, after lunch we went to the beach listening to music as we walked in the water, singing along to every song we played, at one point we got this small audience that asked us to stop walking and sing some songs for them, we smiled at each other and sang as some recorded and soon our phones were blowing up with new followers on YouTube and instagram, being tagged in the videos, along with us having someone record them on our phones, we decided to do something together, we made a YouTube channel, we are calling ourselves, Covers by Holly & Lexi, we uploaded the videos to our new channel as I get a text from Nate,
Nate<3- Hey Lexa! I see you’re having a lot of fun, your voice is beautiful I’ll see you when you get home, glad to see you smiling through it all, you’re such a strong woman and I’m proud to call you my friend, I have something I would like to talk to you about when you get home.
Me- Okay! I’m actually going to Holly’s for a party tonight; would you like to be my plus one? We can talk while I get ready
Nate<3- Yes I would love to be your plus one, sure we can chat while we get ready, see you later!
Me-I’ll be home in an hour, we just have to stop so I can get an outfit for tonight
Nate<3-Okay Hun, see you then! Xoxo
I smile at Nate’s ending to his text, the xoxo was a nice touch, Holly and I head to her car and go to this dress shop, I search for the right dress and heels for tonight, finding black heels that were gorgeous along with a black dress that hugged my curves, Holly said it made me look super hot and that I would make any guy jealous and make them wish I was theirs. She always knew the best things to say, that’s why she was my bestie for life. After that she dropped me off at the hotel and headed to her house to get ready for the party tonight. I walked inside with my stuff; Nate was waiting for me in the lobby and ran over to me to help me with my bags,
“I got these, hit the button on the elevator,” he smiles at me.
I nod and hit the button waiting for the elevator to open, once it does we step inside and go up to our room, once inside I grab my stuff leaving the bathroom door cracked open as Nate begins to talk and we both get ready,
“So in about a month I go on tour again, I’ve been talking with my manager and I would love it if you came along, sang with me at a few shows, I might have also just gotten you a chance to sing alone at a club, they just need you to call them and send them some demos of your singing, that way you guys can talk songs, I might also have gotten Conor Maynard and Anth to come to see you sing there too, especially if you do a cover of theirs, they hit me up trying to get a hold of you, they love your singing,” Nate says.
I smile as I get my dress on, “Really? That’s awesome, you’re amazing Nate!”
Nate laughs, “yes really and so are you!”
We finish getting ready, I get my hair done somehow and Nate helps me back into my sling, then we head out and go to Holly’s.