Five times.
And by the sixth, I was dry and kind of questioning the meaning of life.
And just after that, instead of going to bed, I had to spend thirty minutes in the bathroom, dispensing all the chocolate milk I'd ever consumed.
'Shit.'
Shit indeed.
Technically the wedding day was over after midnight, so I guess my luck had run out.
"Ouch, ow, ow!" Oh, it hurt.
It hurt bad.
And it burned too.
I could feel my intestines, and I could also not feel them at the same time….
Indescribable.
'I'm never drinking again…'
Suffice to say, just questioning the meaning of life wasn't enough. I had to question the meaning of the universe.
***
Argh!
Who knew waking up could be such a pain?
My head hurt.
My stomach hurt.
And my crotch also hurt.
I was basically bare, and so was Marg. She was under the blanket but I could pretty much see everything.