11
And the lessons ended. I said to Taehyung that I want to go home alone. And he accepted. I feel like every second my heart beats for him. I still can't understand what's the point of leaving me without you ?! I comfort myself that maybe you had a reason. But I want to know why. Jimin why are you depriving me of you? At least if you told me where it was! Are you alive? Are you breathing without me at least! But I can't take it ... Something too big in my chest is preventing me from breathing like my lungs want to burst. Without you, I feel like I'm stuck on you ...A lot of people pass by. I don't know any of them. We are like two strangers with you now. What have I done to deserve your absence and I was left without you? Now I'm tired of thinking. When I start to think, I only remember those two hours that I was waiting for you without you ... My thoughts were disrupted by the huge hug behind me. I let go of the hands wrapped around me and see who it was. This was Kai. He showed me that big smile. I didn't feel like smiling, that's why I continued on my way. Now he started calling out to me. I do not want to talk to him either, but now it will be a shame. I waited for him to catch up to me. The moment he arrived he caught me in the interrogation rain.
Kai: Cheonsa, dear? Are you OK?
Cheonsa: Do you think I am?
Kai: What happened to you?
Cheonsa: Gone. A few sentences of voice recording, necklaces, rings piled up for me and left. Do you know what I think? How I love him, why I love him. I think about I can forget him or not. It's hard, Kai. I can not stand it. My soul is collapsing, I don't even feel my body. Tell me Kai how am I going to hold on without it?
He hugged me tightly.
Kai: I'm sure he had the reason. Everything will pass, don't worry! You will be happy again ...
Cheonsa: Even I don't know if I want to be or not happy with him from now.
Kai: Okay, it's time for you to get distracted! Come on, we go! I'll take you to a place you love very much!
Cheonsa: Where?
Kai: Let me tell it to your ear?
Cheonsa: Ok.
He came closer to my ear.
Kai: It's...SURPRISE!
Cheonsa: Don't shout!
I started crying.
Kai: Oh, ok, ok, ok... Sorry! Can we go now?
Cheonsa: O-o-k...
He took me to his car. His car is blue and that's my favourite colour. And he started driving. I closed my eyes. Again those scenes. I fell asleep while thinking about this and that.
-After 20 minutes-
I opened my eyes with the melody of a song. Ah! It's one of my favourite songs! Do you know this?
So Special
Oneulttara balgeoreumi neomu gabyeowo i feel so fine
Oneul ibeun osdo neomu mame deuneun geol i feel lookt good
Gilgeori modeun ideuri nareul bojanha
Eomeona jom changpihangeol so shy shy
Ajigeorinikka ajik an doenikka
Geureon mareun naege haji marajwo dont say no no!
Nan jogeum dalla dareul aedeulgwa nareul bigyohajin mara jwo
Nan teukbyeolhanikka
Nan jeongmal dalla dalla dalla so special girl
Nal bomyeon hello hello hello so special girl
Meoributeo balkkeutkkajida nae neukkimgwa feeling now
Can nobody body body
Dont stop it stop it stop it now
Ajik eoridago bujeonghaji mara jigeum
Ne moseubi joha neoga jeil areumdawo yah
Neoui kkumeul keuge kkwo saenggakboda gakkawo
Don't live for the day lett live for the hourt yah
The sky it not the limit baby itt the view
Byeoldeul saie neoga boyeo shining bright by the moon
Apman bogo kkoccgilman georeo doraboji malgo
Hadeon daero hamyeon dwae Till your dream comet true
Gilgeori modeun ideuri nareul bojanha
Eomeona jom changpihangeol so shy shy
Ajik eorinikka ajik an doenikka
Geureon mareun naege haji marajwo dont say no no!
Nan jogeum dalla dareul aedeulgwa nareul bigyohajin mara jwo
Nan teukbyeolhanikka
Nan jeongmal dalla dalla dalla so special girl
Nal bomyeon hello hello hello so special girl
Meoributeo balkkeutkkajida nae neukkimgwa feeling now
Can nobody body body
Dont stop it stop it stop it now
Wouwouwouwouwo nobody nobody can't stop me
Wouwouwou wowo lett fun together fun together
Wouwouwouwouwo nobody nobody can't stop me
Wouwouwou wowo lett fun together fun together
Bigyo haji mara we are one a kind
Making money flex on them tteogipbuteo dalla
Naui taedoneun yeojeonhago byeonhaji anha
Naega taekhan gilman georeo garatajin anha
Neureoganeun naui fandom we up!
All night we dancing keep up!
Keojyeoganeun mudae wi neun naui noriteo
Haeuniwa dot in the building Turn your speakert up
Nan jeongmal dalla dalla dalla so special girl
Nal bomyeon hello hello hello so special girl
Meoributeo balkkeutkkajida nae neukkimgwa feeling now
Can nobody body body
Dont stop it stop it stop it now
We always listened to this song with Kai. We loved this song very much. I still love it, but I haven't been listening since Kai left. I started singing in a half sleepy way. He started singing with me. I feel happy. As if all my pain and sorrow were gone. We became # 1 after singing this song at the song contest in elementary school. That day had been the happiest day of my life. I came to an upright position on my floor and played the song again. He had opened the song from his phone, anyway. I put it on repeat. I was dancing in the car while we were driving on the road. Because the top of the car is open, passersby may think me crazy. I don't care. Then it occurred to me that I hugged Jimin the day we won the competition. I turned off the song. I turned my head towards the window and started crying. I was leaving my eyes on their own. Why does he upset me even when I'm happiest? We could be singing this song with you right now Jimin! But what have you done? You left me without you!
Kai: Little Angel? Why did you turn off? You were dancing and singing so happily?
Cheonsa: I have him in all of my memories. I am not able to be happy, Kai. Remember, the day we won the competition, I hugged Jimin so tightly. I remembered it right now. God damn it, I have him in all my memories!
Kai: Ok, then would you like to listen to another song?
Cheonsa: Can I open "Hometown Smile"?
Kai: Ok.
So I put on "Hometown Smile". I started crying but Kai didn't tell anything.
-After 10 minutes-
He stopped.
Kai: We came!
Cheonsa: The Fortress Wall of Seoul, or literally the Seoul City Wall is a series of made of stone, wood and other materials, built to protect the city of against invaders. The wall was first built in 1396 to defend and show the boundaries of the city. The wall stretches 18.6 km along the ridge of Seoul's four inner mountains. At present, a 12-km section of the wall is designated as Historic Site No. 10 and is protected accordingly, along with the gates, water gates, and signal fire mounds. The northern, eastern, and southern sections of Mt.Nam walls have undergone extensive restoration work, having sustained damage or been entirely destroyed during Japanese imperial rule. I've been here 42 times since I could remember. I'm tired of seeing the same places.
Kai: I just thought you would relax a little bit. Shall we go somewhere else?
Cheonsa: No, I am Ok.
I got out of the car and started walking. Kai was coming out of the car at the same time as me and coming after me. I sat down on a bench. I put on my earphones and started listening to that sound I was missing again. Even though I am worse than crying every time, I miss his voice, what should I do? I started looking at the people around. Suddenly someone caught my eye. Same height, same stance. Could it be him?
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Who do you think Cheonsa saw? Write on comments!
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P.S.: ์ฌ๋ผ์ ๋ฐฉํ์๋ ๋จ!
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