Chapter 9

"Oh, Gawd," Aron studied the bloodstains on MRJ's shirt. "Is that?"

"Yeah," MRJ sounded upset. "Sam's blood."

"I think I'm gonna puke-"

"Been there."

"You should have taken the Rolex."

"Oh, fuck you, man,"

"Sorry," Aron held his head. "I wanted to cheer you up."

"With that?!"

"Yeah, my bad,"

"He was my friend, dude," MRJ raised his voice. "My friend!"

"Okay, calm down. You'll alert our undead neighbors!"

"Argh," MRJ groaned. "Talking to a brick wall is a better option than getting anything through your noggin'!"

"Right," Aron sighed. "What's the situation outside?"

"Pretty fucked up," MRJ shook his head. "Everyone's shuffling about on the streets! Oh, wait­–Robin next door is safe, I guess?"

"Huh," Aron rubbed his chin. "Good thing we made the guide when we did."

"The guide!" MRJ said. "Yes, back to my question. How did you know?!"

"About the apocalypse?"

"Yes!"

"I didn't,"

"What do you mean?!"

"I didn't know it was gonna happen today,"

"You are not making any sense! And don't tell me that dumb anime got you woke!"

"Hey!" Aron scowled and shook his head. "Moving on to the matter at hand."

"But-"

"I'll talk. Soon, I promise."

"Okay," MRJ agreed reluctantly.

"Okay," Aron sighed. "The guide."

"What about it?"

"We made it. Now's the time we use it."

"Are you serious? I thought it was a joke!"

"Surviving an apocalypse is never a joke," Aron rolled his eyes. "First–we gotta change our names."

"Change our names? For real?!"

"Yes," he nodded. "I have decided to go by Aron Joestar from now on."

"Wow, that was quick," MRJ murmured. "A name...? Oh man, I can't think of any."

"…"

"Okay, okay," MRJ rubbed his chin. "M–Ma-"

"Mama?"

"No!" MRJ shook his head. "Martin! Yes, Martin!"

"I can see why it was a tough decision," Aron spoke sarcastically.

"How about Martin with a Y?"

"Yartin?"

"No, dumbass! Martyn. M-A-R-T-Y-N."

"Ooh, exotic!" Aron faked excitement.

"You didn't sound this pleased with the last one."

"Whatever," Aron shrugged. "It's uh… doable."

"Yeah, boiii," Martyn beamed. "Should I change my username too?"

"Are you for real, right now? It's a freaking apocalypse!" Aron shook his head. "And we shall be referring to the zombies as Zeroheads from now on."

"Right," Martyn sighed.

"Okay, step one says to defend our current location," Aron read the guide.

"Yeah, locking the doors, boarding up the windows," Martyn said. "I've locked the front door already."

"Is the backdoor bolted?"

"Uh, no clue," Martyn took off toward the back of the house.

"Hey," Aron called after him. "Take the baseball bat–just in case!"

"Okay!"

Aron went back to reading the guide and wondered what to use on the windows. All of a sudden, he heard a clunk as something rolled across the upstairs floor. The sound was accompanied by a heavy creak. Aron sighed heavily before proceeding to the stairs.

Martyn reached the back of the house to notice the backdoor wide open.

"Oh no," his heart began to race.

He looked around as he took out his cell phone and called Aron.

"Why are you calling me-"

"Shh, we might have company!" Martyn rasped over the phone. "Someone's in the house, I think. I found this the only safe way to tell you."

"Good call," Aron chuckled.

"Seriously?!" Martyn rolled his eyes. "Just get over here and help me find them!"

"About that," Aron said. "I think I found the intruder."

"Huh, where?"

"Upstairs–I'm staring right at her!"

"Shit, hold on!"

Martyn ran up the stairs as fast as he could. He found Aron at the top, signaling him furiously to slow down.

The Zerohead was facing the guest room door. She gnawed at the doorknob furiously. Her clothes were tattered. She appeared human at first glance except for her guttural growls.

Martyn slowly proceeded toward the Zerohead with his bat raised, but Aron stopped him.

"What are you doing?" he whispered to Martyn.

"What do you think, smart guy?! I'm eliminating the threat,"

"No, wait–not yet!"

"Huh?"

"The Primary Zerohead Research!" Aron shook the book in front of him. "Remember?"

"Are you fucking serious?!"

The zombie grunted as she banged her head on the door, but Aron didn't flinch. He nodded at Martyn.

"Okay–do whatever you want," Martyn gave up.

"Here's the plan," Aron held up an empty cup of noodles. "You stand ready with the bat while I try and distract her."

"That's not gonna be much of a distraction," Martyn looked unsure.

"That's the point,"

"Okay, ready when you are,"

"Help me only when I ask you to."

"Roger that," Martyn rolled his eyes.

Aron turned back to the Zerohead. He took a couple of steps forward, and taking a deep breath, he chucked the empty cup against the wall to their right.

"Raargh!"

The zombie reacted almost immediately and turned toward the noise. She stared at the empty cup for a few seconds and then turned back to the door. The duo breathed a sigh of relief. Aron turned around to signal Martyn. But to Martyn's horror, the Zerohead looked behind her. She had spotted them.

She let out a shriek and rushed toward Aron with open arms. Aron quickly ducked as she reached out to grab him.

Aron signaled Martyn to back off and remain still. Martyn opened his mouth to yell at him but then decided against it. Aron turned the doorknob and opened the door.

"C'mon, you crazy lady!" Aron taunted. "Is that all you've got?"

"Aargh!" the Zerohead growled in response and made a dash for Aron.

Aron gave the zombie a hard kick in the stomach. The Zerohead's mouth opened in surprise as she fell on her back. She quickly got back on her feet; his kick hadn't done her much harm.

"Oof!" Aron got his breath knocked out of him.

The Zerohead lunged at him, and the two fell to the floor.

"Okay," Aron grunted. "Now!"

The Zerohead had Aron pinned down with her weight. She brought her face down on Aron's neck to bite him. Aron did his best to hold the Zerohead back.

"Bro?!" Aron called nervously.