Internship x Test

I stood in front a five story building in suburban Tokyo, and took a deep breath, before walking in.

Almost immediately, I smelled a deeply unpleasant stink.

I looked at the source, a blue skinned girl, rushing into the bathroom by the lobby, clutching her eyes in pain.

My first thought was, who puts a bathroom by the fucking office lobby?

That's a genius idea!

A bathroom by the entrance that people can use, easy to access, and openly available! Moreover, the other bathrooms elsewhere can then be your own private utopia!

After all, a man's bathroom is his very own personal sanctuary, free of worries, bills, nagging wives and crying children, and no self respecting man allows another to encroach up it.

Truly, Nighteye is a man of vision!

Hehe! I laughed to myself at the double entendre.

I followed the hallway to the elevator, clicking the button to call it over.

As the elevator doors opened, a huge insect slammed into my face.

"Ouch!" I cried.

"Sorry!" The insect said, offering a helping hand.

It was Centipeder!

"It's okay. I shouldn't have stood with my nose to the door." I said jokingly.

"Hah!" He chuckled in an odd insectoid clicking, "You must be Shikimori Haru, the new intern. I saw your match. One vs nine. That was amazing!"

"Centipeder-san!" Bubble girl called out from the bathroom.

"I must go now. Sir is waiting for you upstairs. Go quickly now. He doesn't like tardiness." He said, pointing at the lift.

I entered the lift and rode it up to the main office. Walking over, I knocked on the door, and waited.

"What happened bubble girl? If you blew another stink bubble into your eyes then wash before coming here!" Came a voice from the other side.

"Um, actually, I came here about the internship?" I said, opening the door.

"Aha! The boy with the big words. And yes. About the internship, here, catch this." He said, throwing one of his signature seals at me with blinding speed.

I immediately stopped it in place, and grabbed it in the air, much to Nighteye's delight.

"Good! But how about this?" He said, throwing three of his seals at once from different angles.

How is this this even humanly possible? Each of these seals are insanely heavy for their size, and he's still throwing these at speeds befitting someone with a muscle augmentation quirk.

That's some anime logic bullshit. Two days in a row! How lucky!

Of course, as before, I caught them off their course mid air.

"Alright. Here, give me the form, I'll stamp it." He said, extending a hand.

As I went to hand over the form, suddenly he threw ten seals at me, bouncing them off the walls, striking at me from behind.

Again! How the fuck is he throwing these seals with that much power? And how did he bounce them of the fucking wall? These are made of metal, aren't they? Do the laws of physics mean nothing to you, glasses man?

Thankfully, I had anticipated this and instantly activated remote control of the seals even as they left his hand, which I now used to slow them down and stopped them all in place, simultaneously handing him the form with the smoothest fucking slide and an ice cold expression.

"Better than I expected." He said, as he pulled out another seal to stamp my form, only to notice that it had already been stamped.

"Much better than I expected. You noticed?" He asked.

"Of course." I said, "Why would you give me ink lined seals if you didn't want me to stamp the form myself?"

"Hahahhaahahaha!" He began to laugh out loud for some unknown reason.

Everyone is bonkers in this godforsaken world, aren't they?

Meanwhile, Nighteye wiped a tear from his eye, before continuing.

"Good. You're drafted. Any questions?"

"Just one. How many of those seals are you packing?"

"More than enough." He answered.

"Now, Mirio is waiting outside. Follow him and patrol around the neighborhood, for a start."

I nodded and left the room, and miraculously, there he was.

Mirio Togata. Future One for All candidate and generally cool guy.

Did Nighteye plan this from the start?

Because Mirio sure wasn't here when I entered the office and I couldn't have been in there for more than two minutes, and I'm damn sure he wasn't in the vicinity of the office when I last checked. After all, I have a range of over 30 km!

Was he slinking about in the ground or something?

I used Laplace Junior to find out.

Apparently he was!

Note to self - Next time use red reality to check the ground too.

Hell, I am using red reality to check everything from now on!

Giving the whole city and every surrounding biosphere a thorough check, I looked back at Mirio, who was waving a hand in front of my face.

"Ground control to Haru! Are you there?" He said.

"Yes." I replied, "Just a bit surprised. So, we're patrolling the neighborhood?"

"Yes!" He said, walking to the elevator, gesturing me to follow.

"Patrolling is a very important aspect of being a hero. Being on the lookout for crime, distress of even helping old ladies cross the street. All of it matters when it comes to being a hero and maintaining an image of safety to the people. Because when they see you out there, they'll think, ' There's a hero here. I'm safe now.'. Just our presence itself is a deterrent to crime!"

"Uhuh? But are there even any villains around here? After all, no villain would want to hang around anywhere in walking distance of a hero agency right?" I asked.

"You'd be surprised! Lot's of dumb villains around these days. Though they're mostly harmless.

It's the smart ones, the ones that hide in the shadows of society, that you have to really worry about." He explained.

"Is that so?" I said, "Are there any of those around here though?"

"There are a couple. There's a drug operation on the south side of the city, a chain of illegal brothels in the western slums, and then there's the local yakuza outposts." He said.

Fucking finally!

"Say, about these yakuza outposts, is there anything odd about them?" I pushed.

"Hmm?" He intoned curiously before answering, "Nothing much. Though there is this yakuza war going on between the remnants of the Abegawa Tenchuu Kai and the newly established yakuza group, Shie Hasseikai. Though, calling it a war wouldn't be right. It's more of a scuffle.

The Abegawa Tenchuu Kai aren't much of a group anymore. Their top brass was murdered by a vigilante a couple years back, so now they're in a sort of decline. Why are you asking about this? It's not like we're going to fight them." He said.

"Why not?" I asked.

"Well, the Abegawa Tenchuu Kai are almost disbanded and as for the Shie Hasseikai, remember what I told you about the smart villains?" He said.

I nodded.

"The young leader of the Hasseikai is one of them. He's good at hiding his involvement in the crimes committed by the mooks he sends to do the dirty jobs. They are desperateky loyal to their boss and might as well be mutes. And that's if they are even caught in the first place.

Sir has been running an investigation on them ever since they expanded their reach to this city. But in all this time, Sir hasn't found a single shred of evidence or clue to any of their activities. That's just how good they are at covering their tracks."

Mirio answered solemnly, before waving happily at a passersby.

"I see. Then how about using the police to do it?" I suggested.

"To do what?" Mirio asked.

"Pin some false charges on the leader, drag him out for an interrogation and then convict him on trumped up charges. Then using his bail as a hangman's noose on the Hasseikai to get them to cooperate with the investigation. You just told me that they are desperately loyal, right? Won't they surrender to save their leader?" I replied.

At once Mirio grabbed me by the arm, dragging me into a nearby alley.

Pinning me to a wall, he looked me in the eyes, tinged with anger and disappointment.

"We are heroes. We don't use dirty tactics like them. When we move, we move with righteousness, in pursuit of justice. We do not pervert the course of justice with false accusations!" He cried.

"Why not? Most other heroes do that. The police does that. Politicians do that. Why shouldn't you? It's the most efficient method to rid the world of evil. Don't you want to stop them? Every day we don't move against them gives them another opportunity to harm innocents. Is that what you want? More innocent people getting hurt? For what? Your morals? Principles? Are your principles worth more than the lives of the people?"

He thought for a moment, grinding his teeth in doubt.

"No. We do it this way because it's the right thing to do. Even if it gives the villains more opportunities to hurt people. Because all I have to do is save them before they can be harmed!" He said.

"That's a good answer!" I said, surprising him.

"What?" He asked.

"I was just testing you. Goodness! Didn't you see my speech in the sports festival? Of course, I wouldn't suggest such a thing!" I said.

He chopped me on the head, smiling.

"How dare you test me? Aren't you supposed to be the kouhai here?" He asked playfully.

"Hehehe. What can I say, I just like messing with people!" I said, rubbing my head.

"Although, I do have a plan to bring down the Hasseikai, if you were wondering." I said, dropping the bombshell.

"Wait what?!" He asked.

"Why else do you think I chose an agency over two hours from my house?" I said.

"Because you admired Sir's work?"

"That I do. But it's not the whole reason. I have some information that could get you a legitimate in on the Hasseikai's headquarters."

"Are you serious?" Mirio asked.

"Completely." I answered.

"Then we should get this Sir right away!" He said, retracing our steps back to the agency.