chapter 31

Twenty  missed calls and thirty five text messages. That's what my phone displayed.  16 missed calls from Dylan and Sierra. Four from the witch I called my mother.  I didn't even bother to check the messages or call back anyone.

My eyes were still puffy and red, my hair looked like an abandoned bird's nest. Overall I looked like I jumped off the hot mess express and landed face first in a wall of  teenage hormones that make you emotional for no reason. 

Because honestly. Why the fuck was I hurt that Hunter and Marrisa were kissing it just didn't make sense. He's not mine. And I knew this, I reminded myself over and over, it was one of the reasons I tried not to get attached. So why?. 

Because you're in love with him you dumb bitch, crazy head over heels for that man and you don't even know why.

  I  threw myself back into a sleeping position and repeatedly hit my head on the pillow. I hate when I am right. I hate when the bitch that lives in my head is right, 

I  took my pills and finally relaxed and got myself ready to take my brother to the park. I had heard him come back with Dylan earlier. Dylan tried to get me outside my room to talk but let it go when I told him I'd talk to him tomorrow, JJ had been a little harder to convince but let it go when I told him I'd take him to the park after I had a nap. 

My nap consisted of two hours of crying and mentally shouting at myself for falling in love with Hunter Daniels. 

I pulled my  grey sweatpants and a white T-shirt out of my closet, threw them on, tied my  hair on top of my head in a messy bun and grabbed a pair of shades to hide the redness of my eyes. 

I stared at myself in the mirror disappointed at the person staring back at me.

Pathetic.  My brain snarled at me but I was all out tonight to even react anymore. 

I grabbed my car keys and traipsed to my brother's room. He was sitting on his bed, eyes focused on a Ben ten episode. 

I allowed myself to smile at my baby brother, because no matter what happened, no matter what changed, JJ was my constant and I loved him as much as he loved me, he'd never leave me.

"Hey grab your sweater, " I instructed as he rushed to switch off the television, I didn't want him falling sick. 

The park was perfect, there were a few people around, except for the little boy that Hunter was playing with and a few other heads, it was pretty much empty compared to the usual number we find here, the weather was chilly kind of sombre but I didn't mind it, I told myself that the weather must be sad for me because of how sad I am and the silliness of the thought made me feel better. 

After a while I noticed the little boy JJ was with had left and he was talking to a pretty blonde girl. She looked familiar but I couldn't quite place her so I gave up. 

I walked towards the two deciding it's time we go get something to eat before we went back home and a small smile crept on my face when I noticed my brother blushing, he had been  demonstrating something with his robot and the little girl had laughed and clapped her hands my brother stopped what he was doing and just watched her laugh for a minute. Even in my depressed state I had to admit it was cute seeing my brother notice a girl.

" Hey guys, how are you?" I asked with the brightest smile I could master and she gave me a toothy grin back, she's cherry 

" Am fine miss, are you JJ's sister, he was telling me about his robot Lonsman," she replied

" Yes I am princess, well JJ and I are about to leave, where are your parents? JJ and I could walk you back to them" 

"Am here with my big brother and ziezie," she smiled 

"Well.... where's your big brother princess?" I asked squatting down to her level. 

" Right here," Dylan spoke from behind me and I turned around to see Sierra standing next to him, oh no, not right now. 

"Lia that's my baby sister Harley, I mentioned her to you," he said and I wanted to punch his stupid beautiful face, I knew why he was here, these fools wanted to corner me. 

"You didn't mention how pretty she was," I gave him a tight smile and softened it when  I looked at Harley, she seemed a little confused.

"I go to school with your big brother, he's my friend," I explained and she lifted her head asif understanding what I was saying. 

"Well...." I started my sentence, ready to bid my goodbye and disappear before they pressed me for answers I didn't really have but Dylan cut me off.

"How about we all go for some ice cream? Let's take my car," Dylan rushed out his statement and started pulling  me to his car before I could escape and the kids followed in Glee. 

"Dylan I can take my car and meet you guys there," I complained as we got closer to the car 

"Why when we can all  go in one? You know what they say, the more the merrier." He spoke and I rolled my eyes

"Because you'd have to drive me back here to pick up my car, that would just be a total waste of time," I tried to reason and he sighed realising I wasn't going to conform to his request. 

"Please follow us to the mall," he added more gently, communicating something else, and I got it, he wanted  to talk, I nodded and let JJ ride with them while I followed behind 

We got to the mall and the kids wandered off to play arcade games as soon as we got them ice cream, leaving me trapped with Sierra and Dylan in a booth  staring at me like I'm about to explode.

"Just talk already, stop looking at me like that," I spoke and they snapped out of it. Sierra reached forward and touched my arm. 

" How are you feeling Lia? Talking about it might help," she spoke and I tried to hold it in but I couldn't, I don't know if it was the softness of her voice  but I was back to a crying mess and they both hurried to either side of me, holding me and rubbing my back ever so gently. It's times like this that I am really grateful for the two of them. 

"I really don't know what hurts most, him kissing Marrisa or the fact that I have no right to even care, but Everytime I close my eyes it's all I think of, " I sobbed. 

" It hurts so much, she's a manipulative conniving bitch that hurt him once and can hurt him again but in the end she's the one he wants, she's the one he craves, everything that made me feel special with him, he felt with her, all this while I've been lying to myself that maybe someday they'll be a possibility of him looking at me like I look at him." 

" Why did he have to lead me on Dylan, why would he show so much  and then go around and do this." I cried so hard, glad that we were at the end of the small cafe with no one around. 

"Shhh baby, it's okay, it's okay, he's not worth it," Dylan cooed 

" Yah Lia, and it's a stupid crush, you'll get over it ," Sierra added trying to convince me. 

"You guys don't get it." I let out a little louder than I wanted. 

" Am in love with that boy, so fucking heads over heels in love with him, the I want to run away with you and start a new life type of love, I cant even close my eyes for a minute without his face invading my thoughts." I let out. 

" Wow Lia, who's the lucky guy?" A voice spoke from behind and we all turned, our eyes wide in surprise. 

Ashton and Hunter stood next to each other, Ashton with a curious smile and Hunter a pissed off Expression. How much did they hear?

"Well...go on spill, woman there's no secrets in this friend group," Ashton added and the three of us looked at each other trying to come up with something.

"Ron..," Dylan blurted,

"She's in love with Ron," he added and Sierra nodded vigorously trying to make it look more convincing.

Ashton nodded and sat at the other end of the booth with Hunter.

"Nice, when do we meet him? I've been practicing my big brother death glare," Ashton replied and for a minute I almost smiled. 

"You're not my brother Ashton," I said, my voice  dry and hoarse, I sounded like I died and rose a week later just to reply to Ashton, but the humor was still there.

"He doesn't have to know that," he spoke and wiggled his eyebrows making Sierra laugh. Ah this is the last thing I need, a cute couple reminding me of how lonely and loveless I actually am. 

" So Lia, how come you've never mentioned him, is he at our school, our grade?" I almost choked on saliva when he asked. Why was he being so interrogative?

"Uhmm no, he's not at our school, he's at uhmm..."

"Windsor, he's at Windsor," Sierra filled in, noticing I was stuck. 

"Windsor aye, rich kids huh," he spoke weirdly. What the hell is wrong with Ashton? I could seriously slap him right now. 

"You're a rich kid Ashton, shut up," Dylan spoke irritated too by Ashton's endless questions 

"Yeah whatever Dylan, you haven't answered my question though Lia. How come you've never mentioned him," 

" Goddamn Ash we're on and off okay, I just happened to realise am in love with him today, ...it's complicated, we're complicated." I speak, surprising myself at how convincing I sounded. 

Maybe I'm not that bad an actor after all. Yeah right. Sarcasm. 

"Wow sorry Lia , I didn't think it was complicated. For a moment I thought you and my boy here were about to hit it off." He spoke,  I choked and Hunter hit the back of his head. 

"Ouch, the fuck," Ash winced 

"Well you thought wrong," Hunter told Ashton but he's eyes were fixed on me. He sounded a little sad. Damn, so was I.

Lucky for us the kids chose that very moment to wobble back in with huge grins on their faces. Why are they so happy? 

"Well, JJ and I have to go, he has to help me buy something before we head home" I stood. 

"No I don't," came his confused reply and I gave his hand a hard squeez signalling him to go along with me.

"Owww I remember now, bye guys," he spoke and we quickly walked out of there. I honestly can buy this boy the world if he asked for it right now.

We walked back to where we left my car then drove home. JJ noticed my mood so he didn't bother trying to make conversation. He was really one of those kids whose brain was too grown up for his sake but I guess it comes in handy sometimes.

We walked into the house and immediately my nose was hit by the smell of food. 

"Welcome home guys, Lia I tried your phone but you weren't answering," my mom spoke. 

"We're back kids, we brought presents," Finn added and I swear I almost let out a loud groan. At this point karma could have just punched me in the face or hit me with a bus, that would have made more sense.