chapter 7: hope at the end

She looked up and felt betrayed by God. She had vowed in her heart to go back to church and dedicate her life to serving God. She did not even know what to feel anymore. A lot had happened in her life yet all these happened in only one semester. Things beyond her capabilities and strength, beyond recognition and explanation. She wondered why life had chosen her as a bad example to the incoming generations. She was sure that her story would be read by generations after her. She was not eh only one to fall in love in college neither was she the first one to have sex in college yet, life had been so cruel to her for making normal decisions. She is a young woman full of vigor and energy. There is nothing absurd about her experimenting life. However, falling in love with the wrong person time and again, then getting pregnant and losing it before she could get her life together was more than she could bear.

She felt filthy and unclean. She admired the other girls who were still pure and innocent. She wished she could buy her innocence back. She wished she could listen to advise that the nullified. Her mother called her. She did not have the physical energy to talk to her. Neither did she have the moral and physiological energy to talk to her mother. What was she going to tell her? Why is she in the hospital? things were beyond her control. The hospital bill was piling up and she had to create a plan as soon as possible. Her friend picked up the call while they were in the hospital. She explained to wangeci`s mother that range cannot take the call because she is asleep.

She started developing resentment for men. She started loathing the male doctors and nurses. She thought all men are the same. She was feeling better now. However, the hospital bill had piled up to an unimaginable amount. it was more than her initial school fees for the semester. She remembered that her villagers had to pull up more resources together for her to get her forts year school fees. How the hospital bill was more than a semester's school fees. She saw her life crumbling again. Even if she was to sell all her belongings she could not raise half the amount. Her hope was only to God. She started praying to God asking for a way out. She did not know how God was to do it. All she knew was that a miracle was needed

Early on a Friday morning, the day she was being released from the hospital, two gentlemen came straight to her bed. The two gentlemen were sharply dressed and good-looking. She had not looked at their faces but had already decided that she wants nothing to do with them. Shock and disbelief fell on her face when she looked at their faces. The two men she resents and loathes with all her heart were standing straight facing her. Kevin and brain were on her bed. She felt an unwelcoming atmosphere. She felt like shouting but did not have the strength. Tears and self-pity overwhelmed her anger and all she did was crying. But no she said to herself. "I am a strong woman I cannot let them see my tears anymore". "We have come to see you," Kevin said. She did not even words to answer him. Anger and bitterness overtook her she wanted to shout but she did not have the energy nor the voice to do it. Thus she kept quiet and looked at them like two ghosts. "We heard what happened to you and we are sorry," brain said. She could feel hypocrisy in their voices. However, the miracle she was expecting had already happened.

The doctors had signed her release papers because Kevin and brain had paid all the hospital bills. Thus, she was free to go home. She went home without uttering a word to Kevin and brain. They were the genesis of her mystery. They were the reason she felt dirty and unworthy. They not only took away her innocence, but also her humanity and love for men. She could not stand men in all her circles. Life at home was quite different. She could not stand seeing her roommate going to class every day while she slept all day and waited for the next semester. Life was now meaningless. However, she has her whole life to live. And one semester is a very small portion of her life. Surely, the future was looking foggy. However, she still had a chance to shape her life in any direction she wants. she willingly went to therapy and started viewing life positively. Ideally, her perception of men had changed and she was now willing to face life positively. She went back to church but she could only stay at the back and listen. She could now confidently talk to Kevin and Brian without harboring pain or resentment in her heart.

Her experience is replicated by most girls in universities and colleges worldwide. Therapy and counseling are the only things that could help them. while most of them do not get therapy, they end up in worse situations than wangeci. Teen pregnancy is a factor affecting over 30% of all women worldwide while 40% of them get unsafe abortions and miscarriages.