The Dark Sweetest(Nightmare Edition)
A girl name Candy had met a girl name,d Sophia.
They were best of friends and they would always enjoy each other comfort and they would talk about the future but one day Sophia had become mean to Candy on the first day of middle school and they would always be so close but Candy was alone when it came to middle school years and every year after that.
Sophia becomes popular but Candy found it overrated and she was dealing with her own problems but she didn't have a friend until one day. Sophia asks Candy to come with her and she went with her due to being so distant from each other and they soon made it to the place and then she was hurt badly by the football boys and she looks at Sophia with such rage and she swears to get her revenge.
Years pass and there was no sign of Candy anywhere and so she had thought she was scar for life and so Sophia would visit her house due to greed but that was just the beginning when Sophia found out that Candy's parents were killed and hanging from the ceiling.
And so the story begins from start to finish and this might just give Candy the sweetest desire and revenge she wanted.
This is a remake of The Dark Sweetest but it the Nightmare Edition. So if you want to it out then go for it and support that but it only about four chapters.
No rape or sex, but some of the images that I describe may be a little detail toward that direction but not too much and it will be after chapter 10.
Honestly, I am not really feeling this story, I feel with a lot of work and improvement you can improve greatly on your work, I would suggest you read more novels within your genre it will help you know how to get better, we all weren't perfect from the start💕❤️Keep trying
I'm genuinely enjoying this story Author has completely understood the concept of horror. The way the author built the world really captivated me and had me on the edge of my seat. Amazing work
The basis of this story mingles eerily with the shadows in the room I’m in. The authro truly puts a lot of work into their writing. I cannot wait to see them grow as a writer and evolve Candy’s story therewith. Now, to go and hide under my blankets.
The story concept is good and revenge is always a good motivator. The MC comes through, but its hard to connect with the other characters. Writing wise it could do with a good edit. The overall story is rough, but should shine with a good edit.
I will be here to see this story make my hair stand on end, I will hope that MC overcomes all that she has suffered and gets her revenge, it will be a great revenge hehehehehehehe.
There is definetly tension. The main character is obviously struggling to get acquainted with a different lifestyle after the abuse. I'm curious how the horror aspect will evolve from now on. The writting needs some work, but the structure of the story itself is solid! Good work and keep at it!
Great so far! You're doing a great job managing the dialogue between characters! My only suggestion would be to use contractions such as "that's" and "I'd" in order to make the dialogue feel more natural. Keep it up!
I must say there's a lot of 'and' words, you must use different ways to add details to your story ! There are a couple of conjugation troubles too. The plot is interesting and violence is present. I'll be happy to read the next chapter~