"Recuperated"

Starting off pretty bad. I hopped out of my bed. I still felt frail. I had thrown up a lot, and I mean a lot. I had lost around fifteen to twenty pounds. But I didn't want to eat, I didn't have an appetite anymore. I just want to curl up in a little ball and stay warm and alone forever.

Which would be outstanding. So I stayed there alone for hours on end then when the sun was shining orange through my window marking sunset. Nothing else happened. It was just a boring wintry day. I'm recuperated at this point, I think, except because I'm twenty pounds lighter.

A doctor came and visited me. "You're free to go." He handed me some clothes and closed the door. I put them on and walked out of the room and into the bathroom. I looked like a ghost. I could tell I had lost a lot of weight. Walking out of the hospital, I tried not to get many strange looks at wearing a T-shirt made m look weird because I looked obviously malnourished.

So I folded my arms and walked like that. I successfully walked back home in the middle of the night. I didn't have my key, so I knocked on the door. Mom opened it and greeted me with a face of shock, then a warm hug. "I'm glad you're out of the hospital." Mom pulled from the hug. "We have a cake here for you." I smiled, but I kind of didn't want to eat.

I still don't have an appetite for what happened. Even though I'm massively, hungry I'm afraid I'll just puke it up again like I've done with all the other food. I walked in and took off my shoes and socks at the door, sliding around. I went straight up to my bedroom. It was cleaner than ever and perfectly neat.

Why? I don't know. I bet it's because they went snooping through my room. I dismissed the thought and just flopped onto my bed and opened up my phone, which had been sitting there charging since I had been in the hospital. They could've just given me my phone instead of just letting it sit there while I was wallowing in despair.

I saw about five text messages from Sapphire. They all said "Are you okay?" In capital letters. I responded, "I was in the hospital so I guess the answer is no?" Sapphire face timed me, I picked up. "Are you okay?" She asked immediately. "Yeah, I'm.. fine," "You don't look "fine". Have you eaten anything in the past couple of days? Have you even slept?"

She asked me. "Yeah, I'm fine. Everything's been fine." "No, it hasn't I can hear it in your voice see it in your eyes you're hurting right now and I really want to help, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to.." "Thanks for being so supportive.. but I don't know if I really want to tell you right now..." I responded with the truth for the first time since she called me.

I looked at her. I had been avoiding looking at her face camera. She looked to be in bed, or had just woken up. "But look at you. Have you even gotten a wink of sleep?" I asked her worriedly, "I mean no... But you were in the hospital, and my chronic insomnia has been there for so long I can't even count the years anymore, so no big deal."

I sat there silent both of us were. "Truth is, I threw up a lot, that's why I look so sick and I was kind of hurt." I said, looking directly at the camera so she knew I was being serious and looking her in the eyes. "Make sure you eat plenty, then. Get well soon." "Sure sweet dreams." I ended the call and plopped on my bed, that was ten times more comfortable than a hospital bed. I still can't sleep.

My mind was running wild with pain and sadness so I rolled over and got out of my bed. I think we have some sleeping pills somewhere, anti-insomnia. I strolled to the bathroom and grabbed pill bottles from the cabinet and looked at the back of each one. One of them said "anti-insomnia" Perfect.

So I looked at the supplement amount and took two. I fell onto my bed and was knocked completely out.