Chapter Sixty

Lia

I could feel his pain through the way he held me so tight. I hate to remember that aspect of my life. I nearly committed suicide to end it all, my life disgusted me and I cried every night when Uncle Jimmy left my room. I couldn't take the abuse anymore and I always felt so dirty inside and wondered what my foster parents would say if they found out that Uncle Jimmy was raping me almost every night since I turned sixteen, of course, they may not even call it rape, they could say I wanted it and seduced him. Uncle Jimmy was handsome, I think I saw him as fine enough and I liked him, he was my favorite uncle and he was good to me, I think.

Then, he raped me and warned me never to say anything about it to his sister or her husband else he'd kill me and bury me in the woods without anyone knowing and my parents will forget about me quickly because I'm not their birth child so they will easily adopt another child. I was scared to death because he was psychotic enough to carry out those threats. I shut my mouth and he continued sneaking into my room till I had to summon the courage to run away without thinking about what lay ahead of me.

Running away wasn't the easiest thing to do but I had to do it instead of killing myself, I felt that committing suicide was a dick move but I was scared to leave too because I knew that these people were the only people I had in my entire life and facing the life out there alone without anybody to run to or to help me was going to be very difficult for me.

I never told anyone this part of my life except Suzy and her mum then Kevin who was just quietly listening to me as I bare my soul to him.

"What happened to you when you ran away from there? Kevin asked still holding me on his lap. I was deep in thought and almost forgot that I was telling him something.

"I ran to Suzy, she was my best friend and I told her everything that I was going through. Her mum helped me a lot, she was the mother I never had." I said quietly and remembered how Suzy's mum hid me for months till my foster parents got tired of searching for me.

"Have you seen your foster parents again since then?" he asked then I looked at him and smiled.

"Yeah sure, when I was nineteen, I visited and told them I was sorry for running away and I couldn't stay with them anymore because I already had a job and an apartment, and it was doing just fine on my own. I was dating Elvis during that period and he helped a lot by paying for my apartment and funding my education. The money I got from my work was just for my upkeep and other stuff." I said to him smiling. He was sad, I know that and I wanted to take away that sadness then I tickled him playfully and kissed his forehead.

"I'm so sorry you had to go through such childhood sugar bear...it must have been tough, I can imagine how hard life has been on you," he whispered as he kissed my neck softly.

"What about you? How was your childhood like?" I asked smiling. I imagined him to have had a very lovely childhood and I found it weird because he never mentioned his parents and didn't have any of them visiting neither did he call them, well they never called either.

"Well, my childhood was not like that of regular kids, my parents were workaholics, saw them once in a while but we lived together. So I grew up mostly with the maid and her daughter then Alex who was my best friend till I left for college and I never went back home, just pay them a few visits to see if they are still alive and all that shit," he said and shrugged his shoulders like it doesn't matter anyway.

"Wow..and they don't call at least to hear your voice?" I asked. I was surprised to know that his parents were still very much alive.

"They never cared about me from the very first day, I don't think they would now. Even if they tried to, it's too late because I don't give a fuck about how they feel about me," he said. I knew he said this out of pain. It hurts to have parents but you are still equivalent to an orphan.

"When I was eleven, I heard my mum and dad arguing...I didn't know what the argument was about but I came closer..kind of eavesdropping on their conversation then I heard my dad telling my mum how he warned her against keeping me and now she couldn't even find the time to look after me because all she cares about is her work," he said then I hugged him. We stayed like that for some minutes before I looked at his eyes. They were sad and I could see how vulnerable he was at the moment. He was broken inside, just like me. I think this is the one thing we share in common and it's why we are the way we are right now.

"I'm here baby," I said trying to comfort him and also myself. I think we had each other's backs and we could just give ourselves the love that we weren't able to receive when we were little.

"Do you want kids?" he asked bringing me out of my thoughts.

"Oh...I haven't thought about having kids, it's not something I've spent time to think of, and what about you?" I asked as I used my fingers to trace circles on his hand.

"Well, I don't think I want kids but even if I'll have it won't be now, maybe later in life. Not now," he said. We also shared the same mentality of not wanting kids. Maybe it's because of what we went through as kids, the trauma, and all that shaped our choices.

"Are you on birth control?" he asked immediately as if he just remembered something.

"You asked very early Mister, you, my dear is about to be a dad because I'm pregnant," I said.

"Tell me you are joking sugar bear," he said and turned my face slightly to look at his face.

"I was just kidding," I said laughing. His facial expression was to die for, I couldn't stop laughing at him.

"I'm sorry, I didn't think of it at first, guess I was so carried away by your beautiful body. So are you on pills or anything?" he said.

"Yeah...sure. I'm very careful about that you know." I said laughing then he joined me to laugh before we started kissing and making out on the sofa, definitely going to sleep after having a mind-blowing orgasm.

He was mine and I was his, we suited each other so well and seemed to understand each other so much maybe because our lives were alike in a way.